Bisexuality and Pansexuality, a Dirty Word

Talk about anything and everything.

Bisexuality and Pansexuality, a Dirty Word

Unread postby Aunty Eva » 7 January 2019, 09:05

Warning, This post is a bit of a Rant

Lately, in the news, there have been several celebrities coming out as Bisexual. This is fantastic exposure for the B in LGBT, however, it seems that high exposure media refuse to use the word Bisexual as if it is a dirty word and instead say "Celebrity comes out as LGBT". 

I am a 31-year-old proud Bisexual man, when I see posts like this it makes me sad and angry. What is wrong with Bisexuality that it is treated like something taboo that is to be swept under the carpet. Are bisexuals, Pansexuals, and any other non-binary sexuality unaccepted by our culture. 

Let's look at the meaning of Bisexual and Pansexual: 

Bisexuality: 

"Bisexuality is the romantic attraction, sexual attraction, or sexual behavior toward both males and females, or romantic or sexual attraction to people of any sex or gender identity but not all"

Pansexuality: 

"Pansexuality is the romantic attraction, sexual attraction, or sexual behavior toward to people regardless of sex or gender identity"

I cannot see anything in these descriptions that would make Bisexuality or Pansexuality sound crude or unsafe for public use.  Bisexuality as a word doesn't contain anything that could be easily confused for something else that is crude or offensive. Bisexuality and Pansexuality is not something that should be censored. 

Love based on someone's personality and character rather than their gender or what they have between their legs is, in my opinion, pure love. I am proud to be Bisexual and have the ability to fall in love with anyone regardless of their gender. 

The media, News Channels, Papers, and website should stop censoring Bisexuality and as a community of LGBTQ+ members, we should be actively encouraging equality and diversity across media.  I am not LGBT, I did not come out as LGBT, I don't identify as LGBT. I'm Bisexual, I am a member of the LGBT Community but I have my own identity. 
Aunty Eva
 
Posts: 33
+1s received: 16
Joined: 30 December 2018, 01:26
Country: United Kingdom (gb)

Re: Bisexuality and Pansexuality, a Dirty Word

Unread postby PopTart » 7 January 2019, 11:42

I'm going to be honest and say, i dont really pay the pansexual tag a great deal of attention, i know some people who identify as pansexual might be upset by that but if I'm being honest, it's no different to bisexual in my estimation.

As to bisexuality in media, there has been a bisexual dating program aired here in the UK called the Bi life, i haven't seen it, but i think it demonstrates that there is some representation in media and perhaps, certain content providers might have differing ways of dealing the whole issue of sexuality.

Honestly I'm of the opinion that having so many labels, tags, and boxes for the full range of human sexuality is in and of itself, divisive and perhaps we'd all be better off if we just acknowledge that were all sexual beings and the details should only really matter, if those sexual desires are harmful, then a distinction is worth making, otherwise, what does it really matter?!
User avatar
PopTart
 
Posts: 2393
+1s received: 1947
Joined: 12 December 2017, 11:15
Country: United Kingdom (gb)

Re: Bisexuality and Pansexuality, a Dirty Word

Unread postby Aunty Eva » 7 January 2019, 11:47

PopTart

Your points are valid, I would fit comfortably into the Pansexual description but feel more comfortable labeling myself bisexual. The point I was making here is when someone identifies as Bisexual, why label them something else. Surely it is their right to label themselves how they feel comfortable. Therefore, in the media that I am quoting i.e. The Sun. Why do they say "so and so have come out as LGBT" and refuse to use the label they have chosen.

When a celeb comes out as Gay, Lesbian or Trans, the media usually says "So and So is proud to be Gay/Lesbian/Trans" but with Bi and Pan it's like they decided that those are not to be said.

Just my rant, my opinion. But from what I found, it's a common feeling among the Bi/Pan community.
Aunty Eva
 
Posts: 33
+1s received: 16
Joined: 30 December 2018, 01:26
Country: United Kingdom (gb)

Re: Bisexuality and Pansexuality, a Dirty Word

Unread postby PopTart » 7 January 2019, 11:55

Well, The Sun :P

I would hardly consider the sun to be particularly tactful in its handling of just about anything :rofl:

It wouldn't surprise me to learn if certain media outlets play it safe, if the individual doing the piece isn't all too familiar with the correct terminology. Using LGBT is a pretty safe, pc, way of getting the point across, especially when you consider the target audience who may also not be very versed in specifics.

Was it meant to offend, to draw a line between acceptable of not acceptable?

I'm not sure I could say.

Do you feel that as a bisexual person, you dont get the right amount of recognition of your lifestyle choice?
User avatar
PopTart
 
Posts: 2393
+1s received: 1947
Joined: 12 December 2017, 11:15
Country: United Kingdom (gb)

Re: Bisexuality and Pansexuality, a Dirty Word

Unread postby Aunty Eva » 7 January 2019, 12:03

PopTart

I wouldn't say that as such, but Bisexuality is usually seen as a stepping stone to being gay. This type of media doesn't help alleviate this message. Yes, it's a fact that some people come out as bi, then later realise that they are more comfortable identifying as gay once they find themselves. This itself doesn't negate from the truth that there are bisexuals who are bi for life not just "Bi now Gay Later" which is a term I have had thrown at me on several occasions.

This is one of the very reasons when starting as a drag queen, I decided my character would also be Bi. She promotes equality and diversity and is openly bisexual. She promotes bisexuality and tried to educate people on the subject. I find it is a sort of ignorance or lack of understanding.
Aunty Eva
 
Posts: 33
+1s received: 16
Joined: 30 December 2018, 01:26
Country: United Kingdom (gb)

Re: Bisexuality and Pansexuality, a Dirty Word

Unread postby PopTart » 7 January 2019, 16:59

I totally understand your sentiment.

I should imagine it can quite frustrating, when, even amongst the LGBT community, your choice might be scoffed at and reduced to something, that it's not.

But I do tend to think and especially in the UK, most people don't really give a toss anymore, who is sleeping with who :shrug:

It's not the salacious media topic it once was, homosexuality across the spectrum, has become more normalised and I suspect, part of the reasons people don't bother so much to find out the specifics, are largely because most people just accept it.

I guess it can be annoying feeling lumped in with a broader group that doesn't neccasarily fit with ones own personal sexual identity.

Honestly, I kinda like that people don't make a big deal about it anymore. Sure it still gets mentioned, but nowhere in the way it might have in the past.
User avatar
PopTart
 
Posts: 2393
+1s received: 1947
Joined: 12 December 2017, 11:15
Country: United Kingdom (gb)

Re: Bisexuality and Pansexuality, a Dirty Word

Unread postby Brenden » 7 January 2019, 17:51

ImageImageImage
User avatar
Brenden
Administrator
 
Posts: 6193
+1s received: 1094
Joined: 20 December 2012, 20:12
Location: Lanarkshire, Scotland
Country: United Kingdom (gb)

Re: Bisexuality and Pansexuality, a Dirty Word

Unread postby GearFetTwinkRomance » 7 January 2019, 18:40

Heard about "The Sun", it must be of the quality about like "BILD" over here, and "Weekly World News" in the US. I've not known bisexuality was devalued that much in random media though.

Myself I have always regarded bisexuality as a sexual orientation, the way heterosexuality, homosexuality, asexuality and so on comes. I even thought, they are more fortunate, alike pansexuals, because there's twice the chance of meeting their special one. Although I don't know, how bisexual people feel about it, the idea made me envy them at times.

It's somehow strange, but even in some homosexual forums and queer news places I frequently visit, there are people that don't acknowledge bisexuality, or, reduce it to some "minor being gay"-thing, as has been said, a stepping stone toward a coming-out being gay, homosexual. Trying to argue with these people often seems hopeless, they seem to reject the thought of sexual orientation to include more as the binary, old fashioned system would allow. Maybe it's just narrow minds, I dunno, but some are really persistent on that. They just imply, that bisexuals are homosexuals that can't admit to it. :shake:
So trying to explain different, sometimes will make one stand like a traitor. Opinions can be locked in place a lot. :shrug:
There are other people, that want to proclaim, everyone is bisexual. Also wrong in this. I dunno why people can not see it the spectrum way, there's a vast space for all kinds of different combinations and constellations of traits and things. And it can be individual, as to what self definition a person would tend.

Although Kinsey and his scale might not have been the best to document the whole variety of sexuality in humans, I think, he showed pretty well, that bisexuality would fit more people's feelings about their sexuality, than it does "pure" homosexuals or heterosexuals. He didn't include pansexuals, I guess, yet he had an X-category for people that don't sexually identify, or may identify as asexuals and/or any other variety.
If ya want to hang with me, let's go windsurfing!
User avatar
GearFetTwinkRomance
 
Posts: 627
+1s received: 235
Joined: 8 January 2018, 10:08
Location: Seashore Baltic "dolphin bay"
Country: Germany (de)

Re: Bisexuality and Pansexuality, a Dirty Word

Unread postby mxguy01 » 8 January 2019, 00:04



My first reaction was "oh but she's a woman" as in saying who's gay then? LoL Sometimes I'm so dense about female side.
---
I love to travel but hate to arrive -- Albert Einstein
---
The only thing worse than an Did Not Finish (DNF) is an Did Not Start (DNS). ~~ Me
---
It is better to light one small candle than to curse the darkness. ~~ Chinese fortune cookie
User avatar
mxguy01
 
Posts: 3475
+1s received: 1644
Joined: 23 October 2017, 23:12
Location: NorCal
Country: United States (us)

Re: Bisexuality and Pansexuality, a Dirty Word

Unread postby Vertical » 8 January 2019, 23:46

Aunty Eva wrote:it seems that high exposure media refuse to use the word Bisexual as if it is a dirty word and instead say "Celebrity comes out as LGBT".

The phenomenon of ‘bisexuality’ (‘heterosexuality’ plus ‘homosexuality’) ruins the popular narrative of ‘heterosexuality’ and ‘homosexuality’ as mutually exclusive phenomena and thus dethrones the ‘heterosexual’ masters who accept homosexuality at most in the form of gay lap dogs.

For more information read the 110 pages of Kenji Yoshino’s The Epistemic Contract of Bisexual Erasure which is available online.

Also google “Why does Google block the word bisexual?”

"Pansexuality is the romantic attraction, sexual attraction, or sexual behavior toward to people regardless of sex or gender identity"

(1) I reject this arbitrarily constricting definition. Using the Ancient Greek adjective πᾶν (all, every) in liaison with sexuality means all forms of sexuality. But few people are tolerant enough to tolerate all forms of sexuality, and probably no one wants to practise them all.

(2) Nevertheless the term is popular as an alternative to ‘bisexuality’ because it lacks the irritant ‘bi’ which suggests duality instead of unity.

(3) And it is even more popular in trans circles that have hijacked this term with the meaning mentioned above, excluding all other ‘deviants’ from a place in the sun.
Vertical
 
Posts: 14
+1s received: 7
Joined: 24 November 2018, 22:28

Re: Bisexuality and Pansexuality, a Dirty Word

Unread postby Frigid » 9 January 2019, 21:13

I don't personally know anyone who is openly bisexual; they either identify as straight or gay. What I do find peculiar is that among the people I care to know about, they're all accepting of homosexuality but openly doubt the validity of bisexuality - often reducing it to "they're just greedy" or "they don't really know what they want".
User avatar
Frigid
 
Posts: 1383
+1s received: 118
Joined: 20 December 2012, 20:23

Re: Bisexuality and Pansexuality, a Dirty Word

Unread postby PopTart » 9 January 2019, 21:38

I've often felt that the vast majority of people who don't like bisexuals, either to date or be in a relationship with, is because they see someone they can never fully fulfill in some capacity, man or woman, there is always going to be something bisexual people want that, that someone can't provide themselves.

I'm not saying thats right to think, but I've always noticed that underlying sentiment when those conversations get started.

That or abit of envy.
User avatar
PopTart
 
Posts: 2393
+1s received: 1947
Joined: 12 December 2017, 11:15
Country: United Kingdom (gb)


Recently active
Users browsing this forum: acpro, Brasileiro, Brenden, CommonCrawl [Bot], dicksonllee, Ecruton, JoxxqyHor, Linkdex [Bot], poolerboy0077, Predatorjules, Samuel Babbitt, Toddo and 64 guests