Coming Out to My Parents

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Coming Out to My Parents

Unread postby squiresj0924 » 13 July 2020, 10:49

I’ve been seeing my boyfriend now since March 5th, things are going very well, and I feel like it’s time to possibly come out to my parents or, at least, my mother. The part is I’m not sure how to do it. Since I got my divorce, I moved back in with them to save money and regroup myself, but I’m planning on moving in with my boyfriend in January. I don’t want to come out to either of them too soon and end up getting kicked out prematurely. Btw, my parents are very conservative and I have a feeling they won’t see me the same as they do now not knowing. Anything y’all can offer to help, I’ll greatly appreciate!
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Re: Coming Out to My Parents

Unread postby Ander1969 » 13 July 2020, 14:39

Why not wait until you are ready to move in with him? That way you won't end up on the street. I know some parents will not accept it and make your life a living hell, so maybe do it when you are set to leave.
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Re: Coming Out to My Parents

Unread postby Valso » 14 July 2020, 04:54

Anderr1969 is right - wait till you move with him.

But let me also tell you how I decided NOT TO come out to my mom or any of our relatives by mother's line. I already knew my sister was a supporter but I had no idea about my mom, so I did it smart - since our TV provider has TimeShift as a service I asked them to give me on a flash drive news reportages about the Pride in our country, anything they could find from their DB backups. Then I attached the flash drive to my mom's set top box and let the reportages run one by one, pretending I was watching TV. Long story short, judging by her reaction to the "fags, wanting to make us all gay" (her words, after seeing Pride 2015 reportages from the old news), I decided NOT TO come out to her. Later the same year it turned out all of our cousins and other relatives by my mother's line are the same short-sighted narrow-minded bigots, so I made sure none of them knows I was on Facebook - when they asked me for FB, I said I didn't have FB account. Thus, 9 years later pretty much the whole world (figuratively speaking, ofc) knows I'm bi, except for my mom and these relatives of ours. And I'm being very careful when talking (on FB) to people who know my mom and eventually may tell her about me.

It's your choice whether or not to come out to yours but ultimately you gotta decide whether you wanna end up like the children of these 85% christians or keep it secret forever. For myself I chose to keep it quiet and live the dual life I've lived since I was 15 (when I fell in love with another boy for the first time).
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Re: Coming Out to My Parents

Unread postby weedan » 30 July 2020, 17:06

Only you know how she might react, but as others have said why not wait till your ready to move in with him. When asked where your going just tell them your moving in with your boyfriend..
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Re: Coming Out to My Parents

Unread postby Dave67 » 1 August 2020, 04:21

First let me say congrats on doing what you want to do and live as you wish.
I agree I would wait to tell them after you move in with him and then if you feel the need, tell them. You never know how people will react and you might be surprised. When I told people I was bi and possibly just gay when I got divorced 20 yrs ago some were shocked but a lot were not surprised at all and suspected it. Nobody disowned me for it but I never told my Family except for a sister thats gay and as far as I know she hasn't told anyone but I think they might suspect it.

Just do what feels right for you, once you open that box it cannot be closed. Would be fun I think to make them wonder when they see you are living with a man and don't have a GF. Tell them there is only one bedroom when you move out. Kidding, just do what you think is best is the best advice I can give.
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