Do you think people are born gay?

It is interesting that this is a very old thread that has had recently come back to life...

Yeauxleaux wrote:...

I really don't think it's important though. People want to prove so bad that being gay is inborn to counter the religious fundies. It doesn't matter, because even if being gay was a choice, it's still something so trivial and victimless that there's no real moral argument against it. Anti-gay sentiment would be no more legitimate even if it was a "lifestyle choice".

I pretty much agree with this sentiment. Imagine you fell in love with someone of a much different age than yours, or someone whose height was much smaller or taller than you? If people looked down on you because of such situations, would you feel t he need to prove a genetic or some such reasoning to justify why you chose something that made some people uncomfortable, or would you simply tell them directly (or indirectly) to fuck off? I think the latter would be most people's reaction...

I find it very difficult to believe there is some gay gene that explains it all? Why, because there is so much variety even amongst just gay men. We are not all cut fro the same cloth. In my own case, I recall my first desire for another male was when I was only 4.5 years old. My cousin who had a bad relationship with his dad, was sent to stay with my grandparents just to get him away from his dad. His paternal grandparents and an uncle (younger than his dad), came to drop him off. I was so turned on by his uncle who was covered from head to toe with a lot of body hair. I wanted so badly to touch every part of his body. I had no interest in seeing his cock and balls, just his hairy body. Why I have no idea. I wasn't molested by a hairy person prior to that, and I don't think anybody is proposing a hirsute attraction gene. Still that was my earliest same sex attraction. I also remember a peeing down an outdoor staircase with a bunch of neighbor boys (all brothers from a large family). I felt absolutely no attraction. We were simply goofing off. I also remember peeing next to my grandpa in his shop -- he had no restroom in his shop... Again, I felt nothing at all.

Emotionally, I recall loving spending time with grandpa. He would carry me on his back until he got too sick (cancer) to do so. I also cried so hard when my cousin (that I mentioned earlier staying with us) had to leave to go home. (He stayed for about 6 months.) Then when my grandpa died when I was 7.5 years of age. (They withheld from me that he was dying as grandma felt that young children should be protected from things such as death and dying. I was devastated.

Now I don't want to imply that same sex attraction is due to some "mistake" due to having less than the ideal perfect family (two parents both loving you), anymore than I would want to imply that straight maleness is due to lacking of love from a female (ie mother) in one's early years. Yet for me, my whole life is wanting a man's love and for that love to be with a man who is in my household every day. I had no problem with the idea of marrying a woman and having children, but I knew I wanted at least one son. Yet I knew when he would turn 18 and need to leave the nest to become his own man, I would have been devastated again with this feeling of extreme loss. Unfortunately, in my 20's I found out I was extremely infertile. The idea of marrying a woman who I couldn't impregnate was such a reminder of what a failure I was as a man being defective in the fertility part of manhood...

Sexually, I'm also different than most same-sex attracted men. I want him to be a man - not some imitation of a woman. Still, I want him to have the loyalty and faithfulness that we stereotypically associate with women. I also have this weird fantasy of impregnating such a man, and creating life with him. It isn't that I want him to have a sex change or treat him like a woman. I simply want to create life with another man. A creation the lives past our own lives.

Emotionally I'm very strongly a "homo-romantic". Physically, I'm very attracted to some men's bodies -- hairy, muscular, nice ass, nice face, etc. I don't crave cock. If I care about cock it is because of the man its attached to. (That is why I cannot relate at all to guys who "claim" to be straight, yet crave cock -- never the man it is attached to. Some of them will only have sex with she-males or any such person with a cock who can pass as a woman. Sometimes they themselves like to cross dress and have such sex as they cannot fathom two regular males having sex together. That is so weird to me. I cannot fathom if there is such a "gay" gene(s), that I would have anything in common genetically with such guys.

PS: I have to stretch to find someone gay in my family tree. I once found something like a 3rd cousin twice removed who is gay. Contrast that to my partner who has a gay half-brother, a lesbian niece, and growing up had lots of same-sex activity with his cousins and even his uncles and grandpa. All this was on his mother's side. Note, if you were ever to meet my partner, you would be hard pressed to believe he was gay as he is so masculine acting.

I think it’s a bit of nature vs. nurture… kinda like mental illness. Not calling gay a mental illness but not everything is black and white. Either way it doesn’t matter. If you want to be with a concerning adult, go ahead, you do you.

I'm not sure it's really as simple as "blame it on the gay gene" therefore ...

However, it's clear we, as humans, like to understand and we ask why to all sorts of questions that don't have easy answers. Yes, absolutely, some of this springs from a desire to say something to this or that group, but yeah, does it really matter in terms of social policy?

I personally am not keen on a government telling people who they can and cannot love and build a relationship with as long as all parties provide consent. But as long as we give "special rights" to a man and woman because they have a special document ... No, I think for the rights not to be special, they should be applicable to as many people as possible, but that's a different issue than simply understanding what things effect ones sexual orientation.

NobodySpecial wrote:It is interesting that this is a very old thread that has had recently come back to life...

some body been digging too deep and found dead post.

and this my first time to reply this post. I think it is caused many factor.
1. genes which control some hormones production, for example me has no body hair except on PP. i see many guys has very furry feet.
me, i have no hair
2. baby development in mommy womb, my family isn't rich so my mom can't see whether i am male or female. maybe she expecting me to be girl so she keep communicate during my development in womb as a girl. and its explained that in my family we are 5 siblings and only one girl in family
3. environment during child growth, family and friend treatment also what we see and watch
4. experience, maybe some has sexual abuse or experience that build core memory.
5. preference, before i know anything sexual interest. maybe before i start schooling i always like to see handsome guy

I think that gays are never born. They become gay over the course of their lives because of various factors. I fully support gay people and think everyone deserves to love and be loved.

I’ve been studying health and biology for about 10 years, I was diagnosed with autism as a child and it became an obsession to know what made me the way I was .

I came out of the closet 3 years ago to my family members and close friends. I’ve been studying factors that determine sexual orientation as well.

Along the way I’ve come across some very interesting research. I’m curious of everyone’s opinion.

Exposure to the toxin mercury from environmental pollution is clinically proven to turn heterosexual birds homosexual . It disrupts their endocrine system and causes changes in testosterone and estrogen in their bodies resulting in the change in sexual orientation.

https://www.nature.com/articles/news.2010.641

https://miami.cbslocal.com/2011/03/01/i ... -ibis/?amp

This is the first time in documented history a conclusive environmental cause of homosexuality has been found in any species .

Due to environmental pollution we are all being exposed to this toxin the same way the birds were . Pollution goes up into the air and comes back down with the rain onto our crops, into our soil and into our water. It’s in all of the food we eat, even high levels in all of the baby food …

 https://www.usatoday.com/story/opinion/ ... 506277001/

https://www.cnn.com/2021/02/04/health/b ... index.html

There are no studies to date regarding this topic in humans. But it is proven that mercury has the same affects on the hormones and the nervous system that it does on birds.

I’m curious everyone’s opinion on this especially those with a background in biology or science.

I struggle on a daily basis with many symptoms that can be attributed to mercury toxicity like anxiety, irritability, depression , fatigue, hormone problems etc . There have been many links between autism and mercury, I’m wondering if it plays a part in me being gay as well.

Of course I do. Baby, I was....

Yes no question, people are born gay. Had nothing to do with environmental factors as one said. Your born who you are. Granted people may choose to try it out. They may even like both. But you don't just wake up one morning and decide hey I want to suck a guys cucumber and be rear ended with that cucumber by that hot guy.
I'm 51. I've talked with hundreds of guys throughout my years to people in the bars and clubs and friends parties etc. and never have I heard any of them say I just became gay...No you just woke up after years of pretending you liked the opposite sex because a father or mother or grandparent pushed it on you to date. You obviously don't have a choice when your a child but ask the parents I bet they saw it before you even knew it. When your out of high school is when you start really growing up.

I think sexuality changes for some people little by little through out peoples lives. Do I think people are born gay? Maybe? Does it matter? No not really.

I have always been I think but it has just taken sooo long for me to realise and accept it (the only benefit of lockdown for me)

I used to wank off to girls I thought were good looking but saw them with dicks (this was before transgenders were a thing) and as time went on I liked men. I prefer more camp men (i dont mean graham nortons but just less manly men if that makes sense) so I guess that is a product of that

The funny thing about everything I post in here is I will end up with a burly boyfriend which isnt what I ever expected lol

Yes I really do. Trust me I tried to control it and did not go down well

I know I have been bisexual my whole life. Started messing around with another boy when I was 12. Dated girls in highschool. I choose now to be with guys only.

Homosexuality exists to annoy parents and conservatives. People don’t actually like the same sex. That’s just silly. It’s all elaborate trolling.

Yup, were the world's first trolls.

I reckon sexuality is determined at the early stages of Puberty. I had ZERO attraction to anyone until I reached 11 when I started to develop infatuations for men.