I am new to all this

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I am new to all this

Unread postby Lurker101 » 23 January 2022, 21:29

Hi all,

I haven't done an intro so I guess this will be it although this will be short

I am coming up to 40 and I have finally realised I am getting old! But I am in reasonable shape (lockdown aside) and I am about to go back to the office full time so my extra flab will drop off. Although I have always had a big bum....

Anyway

I really just want to meet up with someone and date etc. Im not saying this is me after my first gay sex (altho i am up for that) but i would like to meet someone who will share my saturday night takeaway and watch sci fi crap with me

Basically I am open to anything...i would like to meet someone but if not i will just do sex

Hope to hear from someone and message me and Ill give you my number
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Re: I am new to all this

Unread postby PopTart » 24 January 2022, 06:27

I'm not saying you won't hear from someone and you did well, not to fall afoul of the forums rules about personal details being posted. :thumbsup:

But... this isn't really a site catered towards dating and hook ups.

You will probably get more success, with a site or app, that is meant for that kind of thing.

Please feel free to stick around and chat, threads and conversations can be slow, but that makes it easy to dip, in and out of the site.
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Re: I am new to all this

Unread postby pozzie » 25 January 2022, 21:53

Welcome to the forum, and like PopTart says, we come here to hang out and chat (more like a coffeehouse than a cruisy bar). Enjoy! :)
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Re: I am new to all this

Unread postby Lurker101 » 29 January 2022, 00:24

That message was posted after too much to drink!

I am just happy to talk and listen to other peoples stories tbh

Although one thing I will ask is how do you know someone is gay? I know sometimes you get a feeling but I am curious how you all tell!
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Re: I am new to all this

Unread postby Lurker101 » 29 January 2022, 01:23

PopTart I just wrote out a long message over pm but it didn't send..will try one more time
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Re: I am new to all this

Unread postby pozzie » 29 January 2022, 01:24

Are you asking about someone else or yourself?

At some point, we just know who we are. Many spent years fighting against it: trying to be what were supposed to be. Then we move towards acceptance.

As for others, there's lots of buzz about "gaydar" - the ability to look at someone and say, "Oh yeah, he's one of us." Some are better at spotting others. But honestly, it's like looking at someone and saying "Oh yeah, he's a tory." We pick up on cues that might be right. Or they might be way off.

The only sure fire way to know if someone else is gay is to talk with him/her/them about it. They get to define who they are and what labels feel most comfortable to them. At least that's my approach to others.

That's a quick and easy answer to start the discussion. Please feel free to share a bit more about what you're trying to figure out and we'll see if we can help. Okay?

(Careful - you don't get PM right at the start on this forum)
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Re: I am new to all this

Unread postby Jzone » 29 January 2022, 01:27

Lurker101 wrote:Although one thing I will ask is how do you know someone is gay? I know sometimes you get a feeling but I am curious how you all tell!

If you find his cock in your mouth, your cock in his mouth, his cock in you ass, your cock in his ass — he is definitely gay. Other than that, it is all a matter of degrees.
just an everyday boy — doing everyday things
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Re: I am new to all this

Unread postby PopTart » 29 January 2022, 10:24

It's like spider sense. Only for gay people.

Some times it's an intuition, a certain lingering eye contact, which isn't always someone being gay, but it's that suggesting of potentiality. We can find it in alot of things and the more practiced one gets and picking up on subtle cues, the better one gets at being right when you see them.

Then there are the instances where someone us out and out gay, maybe they mince, maybe they talk vociferously about their dating habits or speak in a totally gay way :gay:

It likely all seems very daunting at first, but you'll figure it out.
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Re: I am new to all this

Unread postby steven73 » 7 February 2022, 03:33

Lurker101 wrote:Hi all,

I haven't done an intro so I guess this will be it although this will be short

I am coming up to 40 and I have finally realised I am getting old! But I am in reasonable shape (lockdown aside) and I am about to go back to the office full time so my extra flab will drop off. Although I have always had a big bum....

Anyway

I really just want to meet up with someone and date etc. Im not saying this is me after my first gay sex (altho i am up for that) but i would like to meet someone who will share my saturday night takeaway and watch sci fi crap with me

Basically I am open to anything...i would like to meet someone but if not i will just do sex

Hope to hear from someone and message me and Ill give you my number




Big bum :lol: well mine is probably average size, its my belly that needs to decrease lol
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Re: I am new to all this

Unread postby Lurker101 » 8 February 2022, 23:31

Steven73...I think my belly needs to be cut down too lol
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Re: I am new to all this

Unread postby steven73 » 8 February 2022, 23:49

Hahahaa don’t worry about it you just have to enjoy life, I like my food too much aswell as dining out and good wine
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Re: I am new to all this

Unread postby Lurker101 » 8 February 2022, 23:53

Yeah I am in complete agreement with that! I do like the finer things in life a bit too much though!
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Re: I am new to all this

Unread postby steven73 » 9 February 2022, 00:17

Mind you I can’t stand skinny guys, my partner is nicely proportioned and I always prefer guys with a bit of a bum rather than flat and skinny
They can make for nice pillows 🤣
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Re: I am new to all this

Unread postby Lurker101 » 9 February 2022, 23:28

I will think of that next time I feel a bit self conscience - I make a good pillow lol
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Re: I am new to all this

Unread postby steven73 » 10 February 2022, 04:24

Lurker101 wrote:I will think of that next time I feel a bit self conscience - I make a good pillow lol


Yep trust me, not all gay guys are shallow although unfortunately alot are if im honest, ultimately you have to be comfortable with yourself we have been together 4 years and cant see fault in each other besides what are the chances of getting those 6 pack bods you see on so many guys, its pointless even trying
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Re: I am new to all this

Unread postby Lurker101 » 11 February 2022, 23:06

I am kicking myself a bit as I was talking to someone over text over a saturday (my drinking day) and the guy seemed like a nice guy but I scared him off

I just like spending time by myself a lot so I am not open to anything

Anyway I do believe in the whole it is planned out idea..lol at how I haven't had the best of it but you believe what you believe...
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Re: I am new to all this

Unread postby steven73 » 11 February 2022, 23:27

Saturday is my drinking day aswell lol, its difficult to take the first step when it comes to dating sometimes sometimes its also quite hard to open up to ppl, i also liked spending time by myself but in the end lonliness was getting to me so i actively sought a partner
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Re: I am new to all this

Unread postby Lurker101 » 11 February 2022, 23:38

Being honest I use the booze to give me confidence to chat on here. It is like a double edged sword where if I wasnt drinking then I wouldn't be on here but then I am a drunk idiot...honestly I just feel like a wreck where I don't know what to do

And yeah I like my own company but I am at the stage where I do want to meet someone

I am starting a new job soon - there are a couple of gay pubs around work so I will head there but I just don't know how to get what I want...I am shy and confused so come off as a knob (I have a shaved head and can have an angry look) but I am a nice guy if you know me. I just drive people off

I just don't know what to do tbh
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Re: I am new to all this

Unread postby Lurker101 » 11 February 2022, 23:51

And adding to that the funny thing is I have my own place and a fairly good disposible income. I always assumed I would go down the "normal" road of marriage but nope as I dont like women outside of friendship - fannys just do it for me (sorry being rude)

I have an old friend who had a gay bloke she worked with who had bad anxiety problems and I asked for his number under the cover of that issue. She didnt give it to me and I couldn't bring myself to say to her I want it to ask about the whole coming out stuff and all that. Funnily enough she is great and would be shocked but 100% supportive

Damn I am just ranting now - I guess this is what the forum is about. I just want to be honest - I want to be me
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Re: I am new to all this

Unread postby steven73 » 12 February 2022, 00:28

Nah not ranting you have to be honest obviously.
There are advantages of living alone you can do what you want, when you want, make as much mess in your own place, fart in bed etc lol.

The coming out part is super hard, especially at work, it took me forever to be comfortable with that now its not a problem, if anyone asks me i just tell them, it was too difficult to keep living a lie and pretending.
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