I have no luck on grindr

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I have no luck on grindr

Unread postby Saeorl123 » 4 November 2019, 19:50

It seems that to get anywhere on grindr, you have to be a slim lil twink, a muscular mountain man or old. No room for average joe.
I never get lucky with twinks on grindr as I look young for my age (Don't want daddies or old) and I have an average body. It's not slim or muscly, but not exactly fat either.
All I get are old people trying to hook up with me :(
I frequently get ignored or blocked by twinks as no one seems to have any manners or respect on grindr.
I don't know how else to find twinks in Canada :D
Also here in Canada no one seems to give a shit that I'm British with an accent. That turned heads daily when I visited USA.
Anyone have any tips on where I can find twinks in Canada? :awesome:
I'm working out daily and following a strict diet to become somebody that twinks will look at.
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Re: I have no luck on grindr

Unread postby Marmaduke » 4 November 2019, 21:11

Your overt lack of confidence and seething resentment are acutely unattractive. You should maybe work on those qualities. Also, you seem like the sort of guy that would open with “hey” and wonder why people didn’t reply. Conversational freshness is a winner. Be engaging.
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Re: I have no luck on grindr

Unread postby mxguy01 » 5 November 2019, 02:07

Yeah buddy, us old guys have it easy. LoL. Seriously all those twinks with daddy issues lining up, it's just horrible to deal with. Suggestion, visit the gym, form a plan, one that doesn't involve bitch'n might make you more desirable.
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Re: I have no luck on grindr

Unread postby Eryx » 5 November 2019, 03:58

Eh, maybe there's more you need to change to have better luck in the future...
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Re: I have no luck on grindr

Unread postby Saeorl123 » 5 November 2019, 14:23

Eryx wrote:Eh, maybe there's more you need to change to have better luck in the future...


I doubt it. I have a fun, bubbly personality and everyone who has met me all enjoy my company, and everyone compliments my youthful appearance.

Outside of grindr back in the UK and in the USA twinks seem much more interested in me. This seems grindr specific.

It's just my body isn't grindr twink material. Yet.
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Re: I have no luck on grindr

Unread postby Saeorl123 » 5 November 2019, 14:27

Marmaduke wrote:Your overt lack of confidence and seething resentment are acutely unattractive. You should maybe work on those qualities. Also, you seem like the sort of guy that would open with “hey” and wonder why people didn’t reply. Conversational freshness is a winner. Be engaging.


I get that, but how can someone know I have a lack of confidence from a pic?

I used to open with "hey" to start the convo. These days I say various things like "hey nice pics, you're cute!" Or "hey you're cute, what type of guys do you like?" Or "Hey what are you looking for on here?"

Once my response was "not you" because you know, grindr
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Re: I have no luck on grindr

Unread postby Marmaduke » 5 November 2019, 14:37

Saeorl123 wrote:
Marmaduke wrote:Your overt lack of confidence and seething resentment are acutely unattractive. You should maybe work on those qualities. Also, you seem like the sort of guy that would open with “hey” and wonder why people didn’t reply. Conversational freshness is a winner. Be engaging.


I get that, but how can someone know I have a lack of confidence from a pic?

I used to open with "hey" to start the convo. These days I say various things like "hey nice pics, you're cute!" Or "hey you're cute, what type of guys do you like?" Or "Hey what are you looking for on here?"

Once my response was "not you" because you know, grindr

Confidence, or a lack thereof, is easiest to spot in pics. The little trick angles and low lighting you’re probably using and probably thinking are masking it are actually what’s highlighting it.

Conversationally, those are all awful, boring, shallow conversational openers. If you’re not going to make any effort in approaching people, what makes you think you can expect them to pick up the slack of a conversation they didn’t ask for and give you the opportunity to catch their interest?

Don’t open with compliments, you might mean well, but it reads as desperate.

Don’t open with asking people what sort of guys they like, if it’s not you then maybe don’t remind them of that immediately and give yourself half a chance.

Don’t open with “what are you looking for?” because it’s lazy and transparent. We all know that what you’re really asking is “wanna fuck?” And we all know that’s not how to start a conversation.

Your problems aren’t Grindrs fault, they aren’t the fault of the people you’re talking to, they’re yours. If the impression you give others is anything like the impression you’ve given here, then it’s of you as a shallow, conversationally-stunted sex pest who just wants to fuck guys younger than him. Nobody wants to talk to that guy. Try harder.
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Re: I have no luck on grindr

Unread postby Marmaduke » 5 November 2019, 14:40

Let’s get a meaningful insight on what you’re doing. Post your profile, let’s see the pic you’re using, what you’ve written about yourself, what your profile looks like. That’s more than half the battle.
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Re: I have no luck on grindr

Unread postby Saeorl123 » 5 November 2019, 14:53

Marmaduke wrote:
Saeorl123 wrote:
Marmaduke wrote:Your overt lack of confidence and seething resentment are acutely unattractive. You should maybe work on those qualities. Also, you seem like the sort of guy that would open with “hey” and wonder why people didn’t reply. Conversational freshness is a winner. Be engaging.


I get that, but how can someone know I have a lack of confidence from a pic?

I used to open with "hey" to start the convo. These days I say various things like "hey nice pics, you're cute!" Or "hey you're cute, what type of guys do you like?" Or "Hey what are you looking for on here?"

Once my response was "not you" because you know, grindr

Confidence, or a lack thereof, is easiest to spot in pics. The little trick angles and low lighting you’re probably using and probably thinking are masking it are actually what’s highlighting it.

Conversationally, those are all awful, boring, shallow conversational openers. If you’re not going to make any effort in approaching people, what makes you think you can expect them to pick up the slack of a conversation they didn’t ask for and give you the opportunity to catch their interest?

Don’t open with compliments, you might mean well, but it reads as desperate.

Don’t open with asking people what sort of guys they like, if it’s not you then maybe don’t remind them of that immediately and give yourself half a chance.

Don’t open with “what are you looking for?” because it’s lazy and transparent. We all know that what you’re really asking is “wanna fuck?” And we all know that’s not how to start a conversation.

Your problems aren’t Grindrs fault, they aren’t the fault of the people you’re talking to, they’re yours. If the impression you give others is anything like the impression you’ve given here, then it’s of you as a shallow, conversationally-stunted sex pest who just wants to fuck guys younger than him. Nobody wants to talk to that guy. Try harder.


Wow. I've never been referred to as shallow or a sex pest before. Looks like I'm done with this site.
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Re: I have no luck on grindr

Unread postby Marmaduke » 5 November 2019, 15:49

Saeorl123 wrote:
Marmaduke wrote:
Saeorl123 wrote:
Marmaduke wrote:Your overt lack of confidence and seething resentment are acutely unattractive. You should maybe work on those qualities. Also, you seem like the sort of guy that would open with “hey” and wonder why people didn’t reply. Conversational freshness is a winner. Be engaging.


I get that, but how can someone know I have a lack of confidence from a pic?

I used to open with "hey" to start the convo. These days I say various things like "hey nice pics, you're cute!" Or "hey you're cute, what type of guys do you like?" Or "Hey what are you looking for on here?"

Once my response was "not you" because you know, grindr

Confidence, or a lack thereof, is easiest to spot in pics. The little trick angles and low lighting you’re probably using and probably thinking are masking it are actually what’s highlighting it.

Conversationally, those are all awful, boring, shallow conversational openers. If you’re not going to make any effort in approaching people, what makes you think you can expect them to pick up the slack of a conversation they didn’t ask for and give you the opportunity to catch their interest?

Don’t open with compliments, you might mean well, but it reads as desperate.

Don’t open with asking people what sort of guys they like, if it’s not you then maybe don’t remind them of that immediately and give yourself half a chance.

Don’t open with “what are you looking for?” because it’s lazy and transparent. We all know that what you’re really asking is “wanna fuck?” And we all know that’s not how to start a conversation.

Your problems aren’t Grindrs fault, they aren’t the fault of the people you’re talking to, they’re yours. If the impression you give others is anything like the impression you’ve given here, then it’s of you as a shallow, conversationally-stunted sex pest who just wants to fuck guys younger than him. Nobody wants to talk to that guy. Try harder.


Wow. I've never been referred to as shallow or a sex pest before. Looks like I'm done with this site.

Well, not to your face anyway.

Bye mate.
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Re: I have no luck on grindr

Unread postby Saeorl123 » 5 November 2019, 16:37

Marmaduke wrote:
Saeorl123 wrote:
Marmaduke wrote:
Saeorl123 wrote:
Marmaduke wrote:Your overt lack of confidence and seething resentment are acutely unattractive. You should maybe work on those qualities. Also, you seem like the sort of guy that would open with “hey” and wonder why people didn’t reply. Conversational freshness is a winner. Be engaging.


I get that, but how can someone know I have a lack of confidence from a pic?

I used to open with "hey" to start the convo. These days I say various things like "hey nice pics, you're cute!" Or "hey you're cute, what type of guys do you like?" Or "Hey what are you looking for on here?"

Once my response was "not you" because you know, grindr

Confidence, or a lack thereof, is easiest to spot in pics. The little trick angles and low lighting you’re probably using and probably thinking are masking it are actually what’s highlighting it.

Conversationally, those are all awful, boring, shallow conversational openers. If you’re not going to make any effort in approaching people, what makes you think you can expect them to pick up the slack of a conversation they didn’t ask for and give you the opportunity to catch their interest?

Don’t open with compliments, you might mean well, but it reads as desperate.

Don’t open with asking people what sort of guys they like, if it’s not you then maybe don’t remind them of that immediately and give yourself half a chance.

Don’t open with “what are you looking for?” because it’s lazy and transparent. We all know that what you’re really asking is “wanna fuck?” And we all know that’s not how to start a conversation.

Your problems aren’t Grindrs fault, they aren’t the fault of the people you’re talking to, they’re yours. If the impression you give others is anything like the impression you’ve given here, then it’s of you as a shallow, conversationally-stunted sex pest who just wants to fuck guys younger than him. Nobody wants to talk to that guy. Try harder.


Wow. I've never been referred to as shallow or a sex pest before. Looks like I'm done with this site.

Well, not to your face anyway.

Bye mate.


Fuck off.
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Re: I have no luck on grindr

Unread postby Marmaduke » 5 November 2019, 16:40

Saeorl123 wrote:
Marmaduke wrote:
Saeorl123 wrote:
Marmaduke wrote:
Saeorl123 wrote:
Marmaduke wrote:Your overt lack of confidence and seething resentment are acutely unattractive. You should maybe work on those qualities. Also, you seem like the sort of guy that would open with “hey” and wonder why people didn’t reply. Conversational freshness is a winner. Be engaging.


I get that, but how can someone know I have a lack of confidence from a pic?

I used to open with "hey" to start the convo. These days I say various things like "hey nice pics, you're cute!" Or "hey you're cute, what type of guys do you like?" Or "Hey what are you looking for on here?"

Once my response was "not you" because you know, grindr

Confidence, or a lack thereof, is easiest to spot in pics. The little trick angles and low lighting you’re probably using and probably thinking are masking it are actually what’s highlighting it.

Conversationally, those are all awful, boring, shallow conversational openers. If you’re not going to make any effort in approaching people, what makes you think you can expect them to pick up the slack of a conversation they didn’t ask for and give you the opportunity to catch their interest?

Don’t open with compliments, you might mean well, but it reads as desperate.

Don’t open with asking people what sort of guys they like, if it’s not you then maybe don’t remind them of that immediately and give yourself half a chance.

Don’t open with “what are you looking for?” because it’s lazy and transparent. We all know that what you’re really asking is “wanna fuck?” And we all know that’s not how to start a conversation.

Your problems aren’t Grindrs fault, they aren’t the fault of the people you’re talking to, they’re yours. If the impression you give others is anything like the impression you’ve given here, then it’s of you as a shallow, conversationally-stunted sex pest who just wants to fuck guys younger than him. Nobody wants to talk to that guy. Try harder.


Wow. I've never been referred to as shallow or a sex pest before. Looks like I'm done with this site.

Well, not to your face anyway.

Bye mate.


Fuck off.

No, what’s happened here mate is you’ve misunderstood. When you say you’re leaving, it’s you that fucks off.

You seem to find yourself quite the unpopular chap in whichever text-based conversational medium you turn your hand to. Perhaps take some time for a bit of honest self-reflection?
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Re: I have no luck on grindr

Unread postby Saeorl123 » 5 November 2019, 17:00

How about stop being an ignorant cunt and stop analysing people you've never met, and offer advice on a thread asking for advice rather than ridiculing them and saying "try harder". You're replies to this thread are useless and don't help anyone.

Furthermore I have no issues with any text based medium except right here and now, with you. I've never had the misfortune to come across such a twat before in my entire life.

And just an fyi, I received an email notification, that's why I came back. And gave you a reply you deserve.

Another fyi. It is not shallow to join a hook up app to hook up. I clearly state in my profile I'm after friends, fwb, hook ups and a relationship. Most just want sex. The only shallow thing I can think of is my preference to twinks only. I have to work out, reassess my diet and radically change my approach from polite and friendly just to get a response and yet I'm the shallow one? Fucking idiot.

Additionally, when I ask what type of guys do you like, and what are you looking for, I am literally being friendly and striking a conversation. Not a sex maniac. I am also showing an interest in what they want and also when they say shitty comments like not u lol, I say polite things like no worries have yourself a great day. Friendliness is just something above your shitty little brain I guess.

Finally, I have no trouble with any other app, site or in person. I've just been told I'm literally too happy and friendly for the sex obsessed arrogant dicks on grindr. I'm assuming you're on it then.

Have a good day :)
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Re: I have no luck on grindr

Unread postby Marmaduke » 5 November 2019, 17:10

I gave you advice. If you want to rationalise yourself into ignoring it, you’re welcome to do so. But nothing will change and your issue will persist. Without change, you’re not going to make any progress whatsoever. I’m baffled that you think you might.

You are doing things because you would perceive them a specific way. I’ve identified that others are likely to perceive it differently, especially within the very defined social context of Grindr. You can try a little harder and actually engage with people on terms more engaging than banal platitudes, or you can keep on with them and keep striking out.

You’ve said yourself, you have an issue. It takes a properly conceited individual to assume that an issue is caused by everyone else and not something that they can address themselves.

You’re upset because you’ve been addressed with a degree of condescension. That’s valid, you’re supposed to be upset when someone talks to you as if you were stupid. But you do come across as a bit stupid.
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Re: I have no luck on grindr

Unread postby Eryx » 5 November 2019, 20:36

If the problem is only on Grindr, I'd just drop Grindr :shrug:
For most places, there's a lot of alternatives.

I don't think people really care that much about your body, though. There's always interest in different bodies. I think it's kind of strange that you have to advertise your fun, bubbly personality all the time. Shouldn't that just come off of you? I have a rough idea of what my personality traits are in public settings, but it's not something I announce to people. Anyway...

Good luck, I guess? To be perfectly honest, I don't see any change happening either. Maybe working out will help with finding more hookups (it definitely did for me), but I'm not sure if it's the kind of attention you might be looking for.
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Re: I have no luck on grindr

Unread postby Saeorl123 » 5 November 2019, 20:55

Eryx wrote:If the problem is only on Grindr, I'd just drop Grindr :shrug:
For most places, there's a lot of alternatives.

I don't think people really care that much about your body, though. There's always interest in different bodies. I think it's kind of strange that you have to advertise your fun, bubbly personality all the time. Shouldn't that just come off of you? I have a rough idea of what my personality traits are in public settings, but it's not something I announce to people. Anyway...

Good luck, I guess? To be perfectly honest, I don't see any change happening either. Maybe working out will help with finding more hookups (it definitely did for me), but I'm not sure if it's the kind of attention you might be looking for.


Personally I don't think it's strange to explain what I'm like in person to people who only see text :)

Many, many people announce what type of personality they have when they introduce themselves.

I find it kinda strange how toxic this site is. I came here happy, looking for advice in this thread and in general looking to make new friends.

Instead I end up depressed and wishing I never bothered. I get ridiculed by everyone. I've never experienced this before, it's weird.
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Re: I have no luck on grindr

Unread postby Saeorl123 » 5 November 2019, 20:57

mxguy01 wrote:Yeah buddy, us old guys have it easy. LoL. Seriously all those twinks with daddy issues lining up, it's just horrible to deal with. Suggestion, visit the gym, form a plan, one that doesn't involve bitch'n might make you more desirable.


So apparently speaking up and asking for advice is bitching. What planet is this site from lmao
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Re: I have no luck on grindr

Unread postby Marmaduke » 5 November 2019, 21:11

Saeorl123 wrote:
mxguy01 wrote:Yeah buddy, us old guys have it easy. LoL. Seriously all those twinks with daddy issues lining up, it's just horrible to deal with. Suggestion, visit the gym, form a plan, one that doesn't involve bitch'n might make you more desirable.


So apparently speaking up and asking for advice is bitching. What planet is this site from lmao

You need to go away mate. You’ve been given advice and you’re treating it as if you’ve been attacked. You make references that many people have told you things about yourself, or behave in similar ways to you, or paid you endless compliments on your charm or appearance. Who are these people? Genuinely. Because if it’s a few friends and family, you need to do one and come back with some impartial input. It’ll be similar to what you’ve gotten here. Because we’re not attacking you based on you dating behaviour, you just walked in and expected us to solve your issues on your terms. We don’t care about you either way. Why would we? We don’t know you. All we know about you is what you’ve laid out about yourself in this thread, and it’s not a flattering picture.

You’re full of resentment because you want to fuck twinks but you’re not their type. We get it. You can sit here and tell us it’s not a sexual thing, but it obviously is. You introduced the issue as a failure to “get lucky” and the word twink is a word of exclusively sexual meaning. It’s a it’s an exclusively homosexual identifier of a sexualised demographic. You, in all but the same breath, completely dismiss out of hand the idea of you giving older guys a chance and yet expect guys younger than you to do the same and seemingly cannot wrap your head around why they might not want to. It’s bizarre.

Your language is fixated to the point of it being blindingly obvious that you’re only interested in the pursuit of twinks, to the point of obsession. This and just your general communication and inability to be critical of yourself or open to differing opinion makes me think you fall somewhere on the autism spectrum, and if you do then I apologise. Had you identified it, the advice you received would’ve been different. But you didn’t. And you’ve presented yourself horribly in either case.
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Re: I have no luck on grindr

Unread postby Marmaduke » 5 November 2019, 21:13

Just out of curiosity, what sort of advice did you imagine you would receive? Can we trouble you for an example of a piece of advice that you would have found acceptable?
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Re: I have no luck on grindr

Unread postby Saeorl123 » 6 November 2019, 00:21

Marmaduke wrote:
Saeorl123 wrote:
mxguy01 wrote:Yeah buddy, us old guys have it easy. LoL. Seriously all those twinks with daddy issues lining up, it's just horrible to deal with. Suggestion, visit the gym, form a plan, one that doesn't involve bitch'n might make you more desirable.


So apparently speaking up and asking for advice is bitching. What planet is this site from lmao

You need to go away mate. You’ve been given advice and you’re treating it as if you’ve been attacked. You make references that many people have told you things about yourself, or behave in similar ways to you, or paid you endless compliments on your charm or appearance. Who are these people? Genuinely. Because if it’s a few friends and family, you need to do one and come back with some impartial input. It’ll be similar to what you’ve gotten here. Because we’re not attacking you based on you dating behaviour, you just walked in and expected us to solve your issues on your terms. We don’t care about you either way. Why would we? We don’t know you. All we know about you is what you’ve laid out about yourself in this thread, and it’s not a flattering picture.

You’re full of resentment because you want to fuck twinks but you’re not their type. We get it. You can sit here and tell us it’s not a sexual thing, but it obviously is. You introduced the issue as a failure to “get lucky” and the word twink is a word of exclusively sexual meaning. It’s a it’s an exclusively homosexual identifier of a sexualised demographic. You, in all but the same breath, completely dismiss out of hand the idea of you giving older guys a chance and yet expect guys younger than you to do the same and seemingly cannot wrap your head around why they might not want to. It’s bizarre.

Your language is fixated to the point of it being blindingly obvious that you’re only interested in the pursuit of twinks, to the point of obsession. This and just your general communication and inability to be critical of yourself or open to differing opinion makes me think you fall somewhere on the autism spectrum, and if you do then I apologise. Had you identified it, the advice you received would’ve been different. But you didn’t. And you’ve presented yourself horribly in either case.


Please stop harassing me :(
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