The New New Seven Wonders of the World

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The New New Seven Wonders of the World

Unread postby Eryx » 10 March 2020, 03:06

So, at first there were seven wonders of the world, beautiful or symbolic construction done by humans and representations of how far the human mind can go. Those were:

1. The Great Pyramid of Giza

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2. Hanging Gardens of Babylon

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3. Statue of Zeus at Olympia

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4. The Temple of Artemis

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5. The Mausoleum at Halicarnassus

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6. The Colossus of Rhodes

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7. Lighthouse of Alexandria

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Then, people figured those were too old, so they came up with newer lists to acknowledge other monuments.

1. Catacombs of Kom el Shoqafa l

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2. Colosseum

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3. Great Wall of China

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4. Hagia Sophia

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5. The Leaning Tower of Pisa

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6. The Porcelain Tower of Nanjing

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7. Stonehenge

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Disputed:

1. Cairo Citadel

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2. Cluny Abbey

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3. Ely Cathedral

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4. Taj Mahal

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In 2000, they came out with the newer seven wonders of the world.

1. Great Wall of China

2. Petra

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3. Colosseum

4. Chichen Itza

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5. Machu Picchu

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6. Taj Mahal

7. Christ the Redeemer

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Now, let's pick our own seven wonders of the world! Any monument or structure that still hasn't been featured can be suggested. The most liked posts will tell us who the winners are!
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Re: The New New Seven Wonders of the World

Unread postby Nebulous » 10 March 2020, 06:29

All of those are impressive. I’ve never seen any of them in person. I have seen the Golden Gate Bridge and the Space Needle (in San Francisco and Seattle) but I wouldn’t consider either a “wonder of the world” or anything.
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Re: The New New Seven Wonders of the World

Unread postby Jryski » 10 March 2020, 12:58

I would’ve loved to see the hanging gardens of babylon.
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Re: The New New Seven Wonders of the World

Unread postby Magic J » 10 March 2020, 20:39

Behold! The Seven Wonders of the World!

1. King Tut's Wah Wah Hut. Location: Glasgow, Scotland

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Legendary gig place, with easily the least sticky floors of any venue in the land and a cool staircase with the names
of all the band's who've performed there. If you haven't played King Tut's, then you're nothing, son. Frequent haunt of
a certain someone, which makes it even cooler.

Highlights: Be sure to sample the local tipple, Tennants Lager. Best imbibed in large quanitities.


2. Statue of the Duke of Wellington. Location: Glasgow, Scotland

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A big bronze statue of the Duke of Wellington. It has a cone on it's head. It was designed that way. Legend says that
should the cone ever be removed, a terrible darkness shall descend, and great lamentations heard throughout the land.

Highlights: Visit on Saturday night to have a chance to spot one of the elusive Defenders of the Cone, locked in constant
battle with the villanous City Council, who's hi-vis henchmen strive to remove the cone and bring about the Terrible
Darkness for their own twisted ends.


3. The Finneston Crane. Location: Glasgow, Scotland

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A big fucking crane. Seriously it's huge.

Highlights: This is the biggest crane you've ever seen. Best seen from across the river in the the derelict
post-industrial wastelands of Govan/Ibrox.


4. 24-Hour Greggs. Location: Glasgow, Scotland

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A gift from our friends from Northumbria, the 24-hour Greggs is the finest Greggs on the face of the planet, serving
pastry and congealed grease at all hours, and providing sustenance for all, from the jakeyist jakey to the junkiest junky.
Rumour has it that Gregg, the man himself, has been spotted here on several occassions.

Highlights: Haut cuisine, dress appropriately. The sausage roll/steak bake combo is best consumed post-Bucky-induced-vomit.


5. Big Stone Vagina. Location: Glasgow, Scotland.

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As described. Stands outside the School of Archaeology.

Highlights: Go through the stone vagina. You know you want to.


6. Squinty Bridge. Location: Glasgow, Scotland.

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A bridge that's squinty.

Highlights: The squint.


7. Glasgow School of Art. Location: Glasgow, Scotland.

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Designed in the Art Neuveau style by Charles Rennie Makintosh, this exquisite building is primarily know for its impressive
frontage and for being on fire a lot.

Highlight: You've missed the fires. The hoardings around the ruins might have some funny graffiti, though, so do have a
look.

Honorable Mention - "Boris Johnson is a Fanny No. 2: Spraypaint on Concrete". Location: Glasgow, Scotland.

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Marvel at this daring, but subtle piece by an unknown artist, which Roberta Smith of the New York Times has described as "simply stunning". Admire the masterful flourishes and calm control the artist has over the spray can, and note the cheeky misspelling; an insight into the rebellious soul of this astute illustrator and satirist. Building upon their past works, such as the lauded "Boris Johnson is a Fanny No. 1: Spraypaint on Concrete", the artist can be seen here to have grown and matured: the work emphasising complex themes such as the ubiquitousness of human folly, and darker notes on the irredeemability of man.

Highlights: The "fanny" part is particularly hilarious.
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Re: The New New Seven Wonders of the World

Unread postby Derek » 11 March 2020, 01:35

I don't want to shit on Brazil but that statue is fucking ugly.
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Re: The New New Seven Wonders of the World

Unread postby poolerboy0077 » 11 March 2020, 04:37

The Hanging Gardens of Babylon looks like something Trump would have designed.
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Re: The New New Seven Wonders of the World

Unread postby Eryx » 11 March 2020, 06:33

Derek wrote:I don't want to shit on Brazil but that statue is fucking ugly.
I'm not really fond of it either, but it works well enough with the rest of the scenery. Definitely could be better, though.

If I could name something here as a World Wonder, I'd probably pick the Municipal Theater in Rio over the Christ Redeemer statue.

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Re: The New New Seven Wonders of the World

Unread postby poolerboy0077 » 11 March 2020, 16:22

Classical and neoclassical architecture is so much more attractive than most modern garbage—and better built. I couldn’t help but laugh when I heard that the marble panels on the Grand Arch were falling.
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Re: The New New Seven Wonders of the World

Unread postby Brenden » 11 March 2020, 16:25

Magic J wrote:Highlight: You've missed the fires.

But no worry, it's a regular event!
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Re: The New New Seven Wonders of the World

Unread postby Brenden » 11 March 2020, 16:26

Eryx wrote:
Derek wrote:I don't want to shit on Brazil but that statue is fucking ugly.
I'm not really fond of it either, but it works well enough with the rest of the scenery. Definitely could be better, though.

If I could name something here as a World Wonder, I'd probably pick the Municipal Theater in Rio over the Christ Redeemer statue.

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This building is all over the place. :blargh: It's like they tried to shove some element of every architectural style and period they thought might look okay together onto what is ostensibly the shape of an opera house.
ImageImageImageImage
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Re: The New New Seven Wonders of the World

Unread postby poolerboy0077 » 11 March 2020, 16:37

Brenden wrote:This building is all over the place. :blargh:

It’s modeled on Eclecticism. I don’t see it as a bad thing. It’s just taking elements that work for various styles and merging them together, like if you took Timothée Chalamet’s suaveness, Justin Bieber’s nose, Troye Sivan’s waist, Connor Jessup’s skin and Simon’s ass and merged them all into one super twink. :gaping:
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Re: The New New Seven Wonders of the World

Unread postby Capt._Trips » 11 March 2020, 23:14

I think the palm islands in Dubai are a good candidate. Far from perfect but ambitious for sure.
Palm-Jumeirah-Dubai-United-Arab-Emirates-International-2005.jpg


Also st Peter's Basilica in Vatican city. ( all of Vatican city should be concidered tbh)
st-peter-basilica-vatican-city-rome.jpg


Angkor wat in Cambodia is another good candidate.
5104226627001_5434711148001_5413965430001-vs.jpg


I could come up with plenty i think worthy for some reasons. The Hoover dam in Nevada, the Statue of Liberty, Leshan Giant Buddha in china, St. Basil cathedral in Moscow, the carved temples in Ethiopia. All are worthy for some reason or another.
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Re: The New New Seven Wonders of the World

Unread postby Capt._Trips » 12 March 2020, 03:21

I hope to see other peoples opinions on what us as people have done.
Not just a stone vagina. .lol.
What are you guys favorites/ least favorites of the original or updated list? Let's discuss this...... Maybe
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Re: The New New Seven Wonders of the World

Unread postby poolerboy0077 » 12 March 2020, 03:43

So no one is going to mention the world’s oldest In-n-Out? Wow. Just wow.
Blow: "Nowadays even Liam can release an album of his screechy vocals and it'll probably go #1..."
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Re: The New New Seven Wonders of the World

Unread postby Magic J » 31 March 2020, 22:53

As a heritage worker, I cannot abide my above shitty list of nonsense being the most liked. So, I shall compile a more serious list. It's unashamedly partial and a product of my own personal taste, though, there's too much to consider if I wanted to choose a defining seven. I would've chosen Stonehenge and the Pyramids of Giza for the list, but they're already featured. Which is a shame, because the Pyramids are kewl. Also, Stonehenge is within, like, a whole archaeological complex with several different large architectural features, including a Neolithic settlement and loads of grave mounds. Check it out, it's cool.

1. Lomekwi, Kenya

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An unassuming hill that's the site of an excavation which recovered the oldest stone tools yet recorded. They were made by hominids (probably Australopithecus) around 3 million years ago, predating anatomically modern humans by a few million years. Discovered relatively recently: I was still taught that Oldowan and Omo industries (2.5 million years ago, probably homo erectus) were the most ancient when I was an undergrad. The first developments in human technology don't even lie in the homo genus. Neat, huh?

Technically not a structure, just a pile of chipped stone. There might have been a nice shady tree there. I'm putting it in anyway, 'cause it's interesting. If you don't find chipped stone tools interesting, then miss me. :P

2. Gobekli Tepe, Turkey

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In use around 10,000 years ago. Features the world's oldest discovered megalithic architecture. Theorised to be some sort of "temple" or ritual complex. The megaliths are set up and carved to represent stylised humans, and are also covered in depictions of wild animals. Could have been a place where some sort of shamanic belief system was practiced, from a time where the boundary between human and animal had likely not been solidified in human consciousness.

3. Eridu, Iraq

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Another archaeological site. One of the oldest settlements that can be designated a "city", and the originator of the city-state model of power in Mesopotamia. Said to be the home of the water god Enki, who's temple was built there, and a city constructed in a time before the Great Flood was sent by the gods to destroy humanity. Originally located in a swamp, it seems that the temple was surrounded by water, and so perhaps seen as a liminal place between the human world and the abzu, the primeval sea which existed before creation. Water is a bid deal in ancient Mesopotamian religion. The place flooded a lot.

4. City of Ur and Ziggurat of Ur, Iraq

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About 2,000 BC. This one's a bit more of a looker. Really big step pyramid from the Neo-Sumerian period. Dedicated to the worship of Ur's god, Nahna. In this period of Mesopotamian history, several city states warred for dominance, and each had their patron god. Early example of city planning. Likely that it was (unlike the Pyramids of Giza :P) built by slaves, so also an early example of one of humanity's most odious manifestations. The OT Bible mentions Ur as the birthplace of Abraham. The Ziggurat was partially reconstructed by Saddam Hussein in the 1980's.

5. Dome of the Rock, Jerusalem

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Islamic temple built around 700 CE. Constructed on the site of the Temple of Jerusalem, which had been destroyed and rebuilt several times prior. The Romans had built a temple there, too. Point is, we're still fighting over this place for some reason, and that's slightly wondrous, isn't it?

6. Skara Brae, U.K.

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A well preserved Neolithic settlement on the Island of Orkney, in use around 3,000-2,500 BCE. Stone built, it survived the centuries before being unearthed by a storm in the 19th century. We tend to imagine ancient humans as being quite mysterious and ritualistic, but the stone beds, cupboards, and chairs better allow us to imagine the more mundane and domestic.

7. Tian Tan Buddha, Hong Kong

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Purely because I've been there and it was impressive. Built in the 90's. Really big Buddha (though apparently, not the biggest). Highlights from my visit include seeing Buddhist monks sitting at Starbucks and chain smoking. The sacred/profane juxtaposition was amusing to me, I suppose.

Honorable Mention: International Space Station, Planet Earth (orbit)

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Don't know much about it. But it's a big, really complicated building... in space! :awesome: When it comes to the ISS, we generally stop fighting one another, so that's good.

Damn, this might be the ugliest list of human wonders ever compiled. The Big Buddha and the Dome are quite pretty, though. :P
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Re: The New New Seven Wonders of the World

Unread postby Capt._Trips » 1 April 2020, 00:41

I was gonna mention the international space station. No one seemed to have any interest in this topic though. More interest about in and out's and rock vaginas.
There are so many amazing man made wonders of the world.

I dont think my nominations were shittie at all. I was trying to nominate more modern places and places that haven't been nominated in the past.
Last edited by Capt._Trips on 1 April 2020, 02:09, edited 1 time in total.
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"We are star dust. We are golden" joni mitchell

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Re: The New New Seven Wonders of the World

Unread postby erti » 1 April 2020, 00:54

Capt._Trips wrote:I was gonna mention the international space station. No one seemed to have any interest in this topic though. More interest about in and out's and rock vaginas.
There are so many amazing man made wonders of the world.


The international space station has a YouTube channel I believe and it shows how and what they do when they eat sleep and shit lmao. Those videos are interesting.
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Re: The New New Seven Wonders of the World

Unread postby Magic J » 1 April 2020, 11:40

Capt._Trips wrote:I dont think my nominations were shittie at all. I was trying to nominate more modern places and places that haven't been nominated in the past.

Oh no, I didn't mean that at all! I was referring to my own joke list that I had posted earlier, not yours.
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Re: The New New Seven Wonders of the World

Unread postby Eryx » 1 April 2020, 19:56

I loved the ISS suggestion!
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Re: The New New Seven Wonders of the World

Unread postby poolerboy0077 » 1 April 2020, 22:30

Update:

Christ the Redeemer is being swapped out for Hunter the Penis-Eater

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Bow to your new god.
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