this forum & the unpleasantness here

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this forum & the unpleasantness here

Unread postby star_trek_geek » 1 February 2020, 01:13

I've noticed there are some members (not all) who just seem to love bullying others or posting sarcastic comments to make fun of people having genuine problems in their lives.

I thought this forum was a little different to most when I signed up, especially as it's about a minority community where one would expect us all to support each other. However, I'm starting to realise it might not be as different as I'd thought.

These seems quite accurate of the internet in general, and I guess this forum is no exception:

https://markmanson.net/internet
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Re: this forum & the unpleasantness here

Unread postby Capt._Trips » 1 February 2020, 01:29

Just a heads up if you click on user names it will bring up there profile and an option to add freind or add foe. If you add as a foe you wont see there post's.
Dont let some keep you from here.
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Re: this forum & the unpleasantness here

Unread postby Derek » 1 February 2020, 01:45

lol get fucked nerds, I'm top bully around these parts and you better not forget it
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Re: this forum & the unpleasantness here

Unread postby Jzone » 1 February 2020, 02:47

I think I completely understand your concern on this post. You seem to be a particularly sensitive person, based on some of your other comments. Human nature is complex, and often disappointing. There is much of value on this forum, and to benefit from this it is best to have somewhat of a thick skin. There is an intrinsic level of bullshit to most online communities. This forum is far better than most, in my experience.

Your options are to view and ignore what you call the "sarcastic comments" of some members, or to block the members who you identify as bullies. It's pretty simple. You can also identify certain individuals as "friends" and only view posts of friends, but this would be a high-maintenance option, with the risk of missing good posts from members not identified as "friends".

I encourage you to give it a shot. Stick with it and know that the opinions of any member here is just that — one person's thoughts, based on their own experience and motivations. You can also private message anyone who seems to resonate with your own concerns and see where that conversation goes. You have nothing to lose in that.
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Re: this forum & the unpleasantness here

Unread postby Magic J » 1 February 2020, 15:53

star_trek_geek wrote:I've noticed there are some members (not all) who just seem to love bullying others or posting sarcastic comments to make fun of people having genuine problems in their lives.

Try to ignore Derek. The thing is, he's been hurt so bad that he's just not capable of interacting with any level of sincerity anymore. He deserves pity over scorn.

We've been trying to help him for ages, but to no avail. It's sad. Maybe you could get through to him, if you're persistent. He just needs some love. :P

But yeah, I see your point. As always, there will be people you get on with, and people you won't. As Jzone says, try to tell yourself that what they're saying is merely their own little opinion, and try not to let them get you down. There's a general aversion to earnestness or people perceived as taking themselves a bit too seriously, as with many forums, which might not be to everyone's taste.

Only drop in occasionally, but I suppose the light moderation and sass is actually one of the reasons I like the forum. Good craic to be had here. Sarcasm is basically the default setting for some members, myself probably included. I use irony for the power of good, though, since I'm absolutely lovely.
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Re: this forum & the unpleasantness here

Unread postby star_trek_geek » 1 February 2020, 19:59

Magic J wrote:He just needs some love. :P


There are plenty of bullies around, there's nothing unique or cute about it, and being one of them isn't the best way to receive love. It's the best way to isolate ones self & be put at risk of people doing the same thing back.


Magic J wrote:Sarcasm is basically the default setting for some members,


There's a difference between irony & sarcasm- ironic comments are intended as a funny remark, sarcasm is intended for the commenter to laugh at the poster's expense.

There are people here who could do the same thing back to him, in a far funnier & more effective way, that would hurt him even more.
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PostThis post was deleted by star_trek_geek on 1 February 2020, 20:01.

Re: this forum & the unpleasantness here

Unread postby Magic J » 1 February 2020, 20:38

star_trek_geek wrote:There are people here who could do the same thing back to him, in a far funnier & more effective way, that would hurt him even more.

He's a 4th Level Gay specialising in shade. His powers are beyond your ken, and he cannot be harmed.
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Re: this forum & the unpleasantness here

Unread postby Derek » 2 February 2020, 00:56

Are you kidding? I would love it you guys tried bitching me out once in a while. Pooler does it and that's why he's my only friend.
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Re: this forum & the unpleasantness here

Unread postby Eryx » 3 February 2020, 00:02

Your mistake is to think that this being a gay forum means everyone will be nice and cheery all the time, about everything. Maybe that's what happens on insufferably politically correct Facebook groups, but it's not something you're going to find here. I personally think everyone's pretty great and they're there for me when I need a pick-me-up, but they're going to be honest about things and they won't pat you on the head just because life is hard, especially when you've just gotten here.

You're sensitive, I get it, that's not a flaw, but it will bring you issues. Being able to laugh at yourself and see past the spiciness of other people's comments might be a good life skill to acquire.
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