Top advice

Talk about anything and everything.

Top advice

Unread postby Rarest-Dave » 2 January 2020, 20:55

I am new to the Bi Scene, though I have been Bi curious since my late Teens. After a failed and loveless marriage, I took it upon myself to see if my bi/gay impulses were strong enough for me to put into practice, they were.
I am currently in a friends with benefits relationship with an Older man, infact we have become very best friends. He is a bottom with eons of experience compared to me..
He isn't in the best of health being on hormone Therapy and recovering from radiotherapy for Prostate cancer, so things in the bedroom have been a bit quiet.
But, my friend wanted to give anal sex ago as he felt ready even though he has ED. Though I got an erection and was ready to Top in the heat of the moment, we hadn't really prepared properly and once we did, I just lost my libido.
Is this the case epic failure on my behalf due to no experience.
Or just a case of if at first you don't succeed, tey, and try again?

Was any of your first attempts to Top a no go? And a case of let nature takes its course? I've been told it'll all come in good time and it'll eventually happen ... Its just I don't want to lose the special friendship I have with my friend.

Thanks for your time x
Rarest-Dave
 
Posts: 3
+1s received: 1
Joined: 2 January 2020, 09:55
Country: United Kingdom (gb)

Re: Top advice

Unread postby Eryx » 3 January 2020, 15:37

There's a lot of things that come into play here. Inexperience helps you feel nervous and not perform properly, maybe you're just not physically attracted to him (are you?) or maybe you'd rather be a bottom and feel like trying to top just because he can't perform.

It is a case of you trying again and trying to keep calm, but it could also mean there's someone else you should be doing this with, or maybe even his ED threw you off because you can't gauge how excited he is about having sex with you.

You can also try viagra (sildenafil). I've said this somewhere else on the forums, but for me and my ex it was a lot of fun. I don't have a problem getting hard but I lasted a whole lot longer and it was a lot faster for me to be ready for the next round, and as for my ex, who sometimes under-performs, his pipe worked better than ever. Word of caution, however, depending on the reason you went limp, viagra might not help.
Image

Image Image

You are not entitled to your opinion. You are entitled to your informed opinion. No one is entitled to be ignorant.
— Harlan Ellison
User avatar
Eryx
 
Posts: 2219
+1s received: 1169
Joined: 20 December 2012, 21:48
Location: Belo Horizonte, MG
Country: Brazil (br)

Re: Top advice

Unread postby Rarest-Dave » 4 January 2020, 04:33

Thank you Eryx for your reply, in answer to your question if he turns me on, he does I have no problem in him giving me soft play or Oral.
When I attempted to Top I needed the loo (not to bursting point) so whether that had an impact I don't know.
But I think it could be more pyscological (mind block), the not knowing. I am attracted to him and have deep feelings for him, I will try viagara as it may give me that extra confidence, and next time round I probably won't need it x
Rarest-Dave
 
Posts: 3
+1s received: 1
Joined: 2 January 2020, 09:55
Country: United Kingdom (gb)


Recently active
Users browsing this forum: CommonCrawl [Bot], John27, LostGuy94, Mojeek [Bot], Yandex [Bot] and 1100 guests