Toys and First Time Anal

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Toys and First Time Anal

Unread postby squiresj0924 » 1 July 2020, 01:09

Good evening, all! Hope you're staying healthy and safe out there. So my boyfriend and I met March 5th right before COVID broke out big time, we sucked each other off that night and, my God, it was GREAT!!! It was my first time being with a guy sexually although I had been attracted to men for over 20 years. It's also the only thing we've did sexually and, since then, have only made out 1 other time and of course I got hard for those 10 seconds. What I wanted to write about tonight though was the fact I've been told that I should buy some anal trainers/butt plugs or something that will help my ass hole get used to something going into it. What I really want outside of catching his load in my mouth like he did mine that first night is for him to empty himself deep in my ass, but moving on. Lol! Is this sound advice? Should I really just buy some kind of toy, use it, and is it safe to leave something like that in our asses for extended periods of time? TIA for any and all advice!
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Re: Toys and First Time Anal

Unread postby ThatNomad » 1 July 2020, 02:03

Alrighty, first question, is that a good idea? Absolutely it's a good idea. If you are an anal virgin I assure you, getting yourself used to something inside you is a wonderful idea. I seriously wish I had done so when I was much younger. It would have made my first time bottoming so very much easier. But I want you to keep in mind that toys are not the same thing as a penis, so don't let the way a toy feels influence your expectations on what an actual penis will feel like. Trust me, a penis feels a whole hell of a lot better. But the toys will help you get used to ways you can help to relax yourself and helps you experience less pain in your first experiences.

Now, on to the second question. I assume you are asking about things like butt plugs. There is some disagreement on this. Especially among fetishists. In general, medically speaking, it is not an acceptable practice to leave a toy inside of your anal cavity for extended periods of time. The risk of injury can be great when an object is left inside and the lubricant is absorbed, leaving less of that slickness over time, and greatly increasing the risk of it causing damage when it is removed and is more reliant on just the natural mucosal lubricant produced by the anus, which is not likely to be enough to protect the mucus membranes found there.

So, yes, get yourself some toys, and get yourself used to being penetrated. In my opinion, absolutely do not leave them inside yourself for lengthy periods of time. But that's just my opinion. If you wish to do so, please educate yourself on the risks before doing so.
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Re: Toys and First Time Anal

Unread postby squiresj0924 » 1 July 2020, 02:17

ThatNomad, thank you very much for your in-depth advice!!! I’m sure you could tell from my original post that I’m pretty inexperienced when it comes to being with men sexually in general. I’m craving his dick, but don’t want to hurt either of us at all let alone during anal. I will definitely look for some toys! Got any suggestions?
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Re: Toys and First Time Anal

Unread postby ThatNomad » 1 July 2020, 02:38

There are a lot of good options out there. I'd suggest getting one of the "kits" that are out there made out of something soft, but firm enough to be inserted, and with increasing girths. I don't currently own any toys myself, and haven't for a few years, so I can't recommend any with any real authority, but I know many friends who have used them and swear by them.

I also want you to know that there will likely be at least a little bit of pain at first, but do know from the get go that any serious pain is not normal and not acceptable. Use plenty of lube, with the proper formulation for the way you plan to engage in intercourse. I personally always use silicone based, but that can have negative aspects in regards to toys, and condoms as well, so do your research in regards to that as well. Use plenty of lube that first time, and take your time.
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Re: Toys and First Time Anal

Unread postby Ander1969 » 1 July 2020, 03:21

And for crying out loud, don't go too big or you'll be disappointed with the real thing. :lol:
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Re: Toys and First Time Anal

Unread postby ThatNomad » 1 July 2020, 03:26

That is factually incorrect. Please do not listen to that advice. A toy will never be likely to be as satisfying as the real thing, no matter the size of either. Not to mention is presupposes the also factually inaccurate assumption that the size of a man's penis actually has a direct correlation to the amount of enjoyment one can derive from anal sex. As a vers bottom I can assure you, that is not correct.
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Re: Toys and First Time Anal

Unread postby Eryx » 1 July 2020, 20:01

Just masturbate with your finger or a toothbrush wrapped up in a condom or something. Nothing will make you a better bottom than being actually fucked.
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Re: Toys and First Time Anal

Unread postby Ander1969 » 2 July 2020, 13:36

ThatNomad wrote:That is factually incorrect. Please do not listen to that advice. A toy will never be likely to be as satisfying as the real thing, no matter the size of either. Not to mention is presupposes the also factually inaccurate assumption that the size of a man's penis actually has a direct correlation to the amount of enjoyment one can derive from anal sex. As a vers bottom I can assure you, that is not correct.

Oh get over yourself. It's basic fucking physiology. One starts off small and eventually moves to bigger. Duh! How many 4 inch pencil dildos do you see out there?
But ok OP, start off with the King Kong dildo, the 15" with the 4" diameter. Go ahead and report back to us please. :lol:
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Re: Toys and First Time Anal

Unread postby ThatNomad » 2 July 2020, 13:43

To the OP please also skip that advice as well. The person giving it apparently has taken a dislike to me and enjoys trying to refute the things I say, even if what they counter with is outlandish and illogical.

The anus is not something you can simply stretch out and it stays that way. So the size of the dildo you use comfortably and safely will not affect your ability to derive pleasure from sex with an actual human being as the muscles will have returned to their equilibrium soon after use of the dildo. Just like the size of a man's actual penis doesn't necessarily correlate to the enjoyment of sex with that man.
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Re: Toys and First Time Anal

Unread postby Ander1969 » 2 July 2020, 14:00

Here is a good article on anal sex for beginners, written by men and for men. Just go slow and use lots of lube.

https://www.menshealth.com/sex-women/a1 ... sex-guide/
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Re: Toys and First Time Anal

Unread postby Ander1969 » 2 July 2020, 14:01

Here's another good article for beginners.
https://lifehacker.com/the-beginners-gu ... 1740981181
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Re: Toys and First Time Anal

Unread postby Ander1969 » 2 July 2020, 23:16

I think my favourite toy is still my Aneros. Never disappoints. :D
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Re: Toys and First Time Anal

Unread postby Dave67 » 26 July 2020, 06:34

My first time anal as a bottom was after my divorce 20 yrs ago and yes I had been with a couple of guys before marriage but never had anal sex until after my divorce but I had been fingered a couple times.
Anyway a female friend of mine that I confided in that I liked men a lot and was possibly gay not just bi told me she worked with a gay guy and would bring him over one night and we could all have some drinks and hang out at my apartment. After a few drinks her gay coworker started hitting on me and kissed me when she went to the bathroom, I liked it A LOT and one thing led to another and I got pounded that night after she went to bed.

I had too much to drink but had decided after my divorce that I would try and come out as I hid being gay my whole life and I was 38 at that time. I woke up the next day realizing what I had done and was freaking out a bit then I could feel where he had been in me, a little sore but a good feeling as well, hard to explain but I got past the panic of omg to omg I gotta have some more of that!

I had used a the ex wifes dildo on myself a few times while married so I was used to the anal bit until you have a real penis there its just no comparison. And if you liked it you will do it again and again and again. For me it was the best sex ever.
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Re: Toys and First Time Anal

Unread postby Ander1969 » 27 July 2020, 15:40

:) Cool story!
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Re: Toys and First Time Anal

Unread postby mysextoyfinder » 25 December 2020, 01:59

I love your story.
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Re: Toys and First Time Anal

Unread postby Aladdin » 25 December 2020, 20:08

Try searching for Pastor Ssempna on YouTube for advice on this.
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