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Twitter

Unread postby GaySpacePirateKing » 13 January 2020, 19:16

Just wondering how people feel about twitter as I don't have it. Is it useful for meeting new people? Is it common for people to use it for dating and making new friends?
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Re: Twitter

Unread postby René » 13 January 2020, 19:39

I only recently set up an account and I've hardly used it so far, so I can't tell you much. It always seemed rather pointless, though slightly less so now that the character limit isn't absurdly low anymore. I always hated how it reduced sophisticated people like senior statesmen to talking in what amounted to text speak, which is less of an issue now.
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Re: Twitter

Unread postby GaySpacePirateKing » 13 January 2020, 19:54

I've never understood it either as I've always thought you can do more with facebook, but I know people who have met people through twitter. I guess they just posted about things they like and followed people who like the same things.
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Re: Twitter

Unread postby mxguy01 » 13 January 2020, 19:56

Twitter - for extremely shallow people who want to put hardly any effort into even just being that.
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Re: Twitter

Unread postby GaySpacePirateKing » 13 January 2020, 20:06

mxguy01 wrote:Twitter - for extremely shallow people who want to put hardly any effort into even just being that.


Much like every other social media platform including online forums then...
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Re: Twitter

Unread postby René » 13 January 2020, 20:11

GaySpacePirateKing wrote:
mxguy01 wrote:Twitter - for extremely shallow people who want to put hardly any effort into even just being that.

Much like every other social media platform including online forums then...

Except on forums people can and do write rather deep posts of hundreds or even thousands of words and really get to know each other just through that platform. There's a bit more effort there, and it's enabled by not being limited to xxx characters (as well as other advantages).

I've never heard of people making friends through Twitter, but I suppose it must happen sometimes.
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Re: Twitter

Unread postby mxguy01 » 13 January 2020, 20:30

And yet forums are withering at best while (instant gratification) social media sites thrive...
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Re: Twitter

Unread postby GaySpacePirateKing » 13 January 2020, 20:52

René wrote:
GaySpacePirateKing wrote:
mxguy01 wrote:Twitter - for extremely shallow people who want to put hardly any effort into even just being that.

Much like every other social media platform including online forums then...

Except on forums people can and do write rather deep posts of hundreds or even thousands of words and really get to know each other just through that platform. There's a bit more effort there, and it's enabled by not being limited to xxx characters (as well as other advantages).

I've never heard of people making friends through Twitter, but I suppose it must happen sometimes.


GayForum is hardly a bastion of 'deep posts' though is it?

Forums can be as shallow as pretty much everywhere else or they can not be, which was my only point there.

Also I've made the mistake of writing of 'shallow people' before who I later discovered where actually quite intelligent just that they acted in ways or liked things I considered 'shallow'.
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Re: Twitter

Unread postby René » 13 January 2020, 20:57

GaySpacePirateKing wrote:
René wrote:
GaySpacePirateKing wrote:
mxguy01 wrote:Twitter - for extremely shallow people who want to put hardly any effort into even just being that.

Much like every other social media platform including online forums then...

Except on forums people can and do write rather deep posts of hundreds or even thousands of words and really get to know each other just through that platform. There's a bit more effort there, and it's enabled by not being limited to xxx characters (as well as other advantages).

I've never heard of people making friends through Twitter, but I suppose it must happen sometimes.

GayForum is hardly a bastion of 'deep posts' though is it?

Forums can be as shallow as pretty much everywhere else or they can not be, which was my only point there.

Also I've made the mistake of writing of 'shallow people' before who I later discovered where actually quite intelligent just that they acted in ways or liked things I considered 'shallow'.

Did I say it was?

My main point was that I've really gotten to know many people and made quite a few true friends, and even met the person I ended up marrying, through forums. It's hard to imagine that happening so easily through Twitter.
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Re: Twitter

Unread postby GaySpacePirateKing » 13 January 2020, 21:40

Did that take a lot of time and investment in the forum?

I think its pretty hard to get to know people on forums especially since most forums that have been going for awhile usually already have inner circles already built. They are also impersonal until you start talking to the same people regularly and pm them.

With social media platforms and other dating apps and so on it is probably quicker to meet and start talking to a new person.

Anyway I was just considering whether its worth me trying to get more active online as a way to meet people as I am a bit at a loss as to what to do.

I've also spent a bit of time lately looking around for gay support groups in the UK that can help with things like loneliness and mental health and there seems to be very little out there.
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Re: Twitter

Unread postby Brenden » 13 January 2020, 21:55

GaySpacePirateKing wrote:I've also spent a bit of time lately looking around for gay support groups in the UK that can help with things like loneliness and mental health and there seems to be very little out there.

Do you like the outdoors/walking? Because there's the Gay Outdoor Club. Look for them on Meetup if they have any events you can get to, perhaps by carpooling. It's mostly older guys, but there are some young guys in the mix, and usually plenty of interesting characters to converse with during events. (There's also OutdoorLads, which has a slightly younger average demographic, but I found their organisation to be too corporate and less friendly, and expensive. I felt like besides overpriced membership, they kept wanting to sell me gear through affiliates.)
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Re: Twitter

Unread postby René » 14 January 2020, 03:40

GaySpacePirateKing wrote:Did that take a lot of time and investment in the forum?

Yes, for example on the forum where I met most of the people I now know apart from relatives, including my now husband of 10 years (who lived on the other side of the Atlantic at the time) and a dear friend who recently drove 10 hours up from London after learning I was in the hospital in Glasgow, I had 16,395 posts totalling approx. 663,586 words.

GaySpacePirateKing wrote:I think its pretty hard to get to know people on forums especially since most forums that have been going for awhile usually already have inner circles already built. They are also impersonal until you start talking to the same people regularly and pm them.

I actually created the aforementioned forum as an off-shoot of a forum that had been going with a well-established user base for years, having established myself over the course of about a year (I was made a moderator a few months in), after which the admins there went on a power trip and the community needed a new home. My husband joined the new forum, which had inherited the "inner circles" of the original one, more than a year later and successfully established himself there, and his posts were enough to make me romantically interested in him.

I've never found forums impersonal. Throughout my life, I've found them by far the easiest way to get to know new people and make friends. But then, I've probably had more contact with people posting on forums ever since I was about 12 years old than through the entire rest of my life combined, and my Asperger's is probably involved, so I suppose it makes sense that someone who hasn't had that lifelong experience would have a different perspective :P

GaySpacePirateKing wrote:With social media platforms and other dating apps and so on it is probably quicker to meet and start talking to a new person.

Of course it is, especially in the latter case which was designed for that specific purpose.
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Re: Twitter

Unread postby homomorphism » 14 January 2020, 14:31

René wrote:I've never found forums impersonal. Throughout my life, I've found them by far the easiest way to get to know new people and make friends.


In a lot of ways, they're a lot more personal. If this were a subreddit, for example, I don't think I ever would've talked with you (or anyone else) directly. The sheer volume of people posting on any popular subreddit would have pretty much guaranteed that I would have, at best, vaguely remembered your handle. If I used some extension, I could've tagged you as an insightful poster or something, but it probably wouldn't have gone beyond that. And conversations aren't chronological on most modern web apps anyway, so you're not really following a dialogue. You're looking at individual conversation offshoots.

The bulletin board experience has a much larger community and social aspect to it than modern social media.

mxguy01 wrote:And yet forums are withering at best while (instant gratification) social media sites thrive...


I haven't looked at the numbers, but I have no doubt that bulletin boards are down in traffic. I think it's a little much to say this is all due to instant gratification. BBs were always kind of a niche area -- nobody was getting invited to the cool kids' lunch table because of their sick UseNet mailing list, and BBs are a natural extension of that. BBs are dated. Technologically speaking, there's not a ton of difference between GFO and forums from 20 or 30 years ago. People have different expectations today for what websites look like and the devices they use to interact with them. Modern web apps are in the mainstream, so there's a pretty direct path for taking people to them, while BBs always required work to get to know. The personal and social nature of BBs means it's a lot harder to become "in" with the community, whereas e.g., subreddits have little barrier to entry.
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Re: Twitter

Unread postby poolerboy0077 » 14 January 2020, 16:51

René needs to create a site that’s all imaged based where you score points the sluttier you are. The GTF floozies would flock back in a heartbeat.
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Re: Twitter

Unread postby homomorphism » 14 January 2020, 17:46

poolerboy0077 wrote:René needs to create a site that’s all imaged based where you score points the sluttier you are. The GTF floozies would flock back in a heartbeat.

And the barrier to entry is that you need to post a slutty selfie.
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Re: Twitter

Unread postby John27 » 19 January 2020, 22:28

mxguy01 wrote:And yet forums are withering at best while (instant gratification) social media sites thrive...


Yes, and I've heard others make that comment. I've also seen decline of forum activity with some forums--although that may be a marker of forum trends in general, or some issue specific to that forum (like some toxic personalities driving everyone else away).

One thing I've noted with Facebook groups: the overall experience doesn't work as well as a good forum. But there is huge convenience, particularly with joining. Click a button, maybe answer a couple of quick questions, and wait for approval. No need to find a user name that hasn't been taken. Activate through an e-mail link. And it's conveniently integrated with Facebook, so one can go there to see the photos from your aunt's birthday party, watch a cute cat video or two, and then go to a group.
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Re: Twitter

Unread postby John27 » 19 January 2020, 22:35

René wrote:I've never found forums impersonal.


I've heard the "impersonal" argument, but I can't say I've felt that way. I know of several forums where users have formed "real world" connections. And that may not happen on other forums as readily, but the people become "known" on that forum. I think it all depends on the specific forum.
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Re: Twitter

Unread postby John27 » 19 January 2020, 22:40

As for Twitter, I joined at one point, but I've never actually used it. I think I Tweeted two times. It's more use for reading stuff posted by others, and even that is something I don't bother with consistently.

While a lot does seem shallow, I have seen some stuff that has substance, although some of that is split across multiple Tweets (at which point,one can argue a different platform might make sense).
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Re: Twitter

Unread postby GaySpacePirateKing » 22 January 2020, 21:33

Brenden wrote:
GaySpacePirateKing wrote:I've also spent a bit of time lately looking around for gay support groups in the UK that can help with things like loneliness and mental health and there seems to be very little out there.

Do you like the outdoors/walking? Because there's the Gay Outdoor Club. Look for them on Meetup if they have any events you can get to, perhaps by carpooling. It's mostly older guys, but there are some young guys in the mix, and usually plenty of interesting characters to converse with during events. (There's also OutdoorLads, which has a slightly younger average demographic, but I found their organisation to be too corporate and less friendly, and expensive. I felt like besides overpriced membership, they kept wanting to sell me gear through affiliates.)


Cheers! I am not very outdoorsy though but is maybe something to consider when the weather starts getting better.

I've tried meetup before though and never found much use for it as didnt seem to be much on it. I tried joining a group for lgbt people that would meet for coffee and play board games somewhere as that seemed easy but never did get admitted to it.
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Re: Twitter

Unread postby John27 » 23 January 2020, 09:12

I've heard Meetup suggested before on another forum. Some people have had very good luck, but I haven't been terribly impressed by the offerings in my area. I imagine some areas have better selection of groups than others. That said, it's worth at least looking into.
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