What made you laugh today?

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Re: What made you laugh today?

Unread postby Brenden » 8 February 2020, 22:52

Magic J wrote:Speaking of Gwyneth Paltrow, I recently had cause to investigate some Goop products, since I have need of the good vibes advertised.

The only good vibes Goop produces are in Gwyneth's accountant's office.
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Re: What made you laugh today?

Unread postby Magic J » 8 February 2020, 22:52

Brenden wrote:
Magic J wrote:Speaking of Gwyneth Paltrow, I recently had cause to investigate some Goop products, since I have need of the good vibes advertised.

The only good vibes Goop produces are in Gwyneth's accountant's office.

It's actually shocking. :lol:
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Re: What made you laugh today?

Unread postby Jzone » 8 February 2020, 22:53

Yes, well. Gwyneth Paltrow is to women what PT Barnum was to conjoined twins.
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Re: What made you laugh today?

Unread postby Derek » 8 February 2020, 22:56

Brenden wrote:
Magic J wrote:Speaking of Gwyneth Paltrow, I recently had cause to investigate some Goop products, since I have need of the good vibes advertised.

The only good vibes Goop produces are in Gwyneth's accountant's office.

I take exception. Us accountants don't give a crap if a client is making or losing money. We only care about getting paid and making beautiful spreadsheets.
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Re: What made you laugh today?

Unread postby Jzone » 8 February 2020, 23:00

Stick a jade egg deep in your spreadsheet and inhale some CBD oil while visualizing abundance. Works for me.
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Re: What made you laugh today?

Unread postby Magic J » 8 February 2020, 23:07

Jzone wrote:Stick a jade egg deep in your spreadsheet and inhale some CBD oil while visualizing abundance. Works for me.

I bought a bottle of CBD oil and had a bit. Felt a little bit drowsy. Then, after a quick check to gauge toxicity, took a fucking load of it.

Fell asleep. Was a'ight.
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Re: What made you laugh today?

Unread postby Brenden » 8 February 2020, 23:08

Derek wrote:
Brenden wrote:
Magic J wrote:Speaking of Gwyneth Paltrow, I recently had cause to investigate some Goop products, since I have need of the good vibes advertised.

The only good vibes Goop produces are in Gwyneth's accountant's office.

I take exception. Us accountants don't give a crap if a client is making or losing money. We only care about getting paid and making beautiful spreadsheets.

I thought accountants of super wealthy people and corporations got commission on top of fees?
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Re: What made you laugh today?

Unread postby Derek » 8 February 2020, 23:22

Mmm maybe financial managers do, but the prestigious accountants in tax or audit work at public firms and they typically negotiate a fixed price that covers a certain financial period. I certainly doubt the in-house accountants at Goop Inc. have a stake in the goop.
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Re: What made you laugh today?

Unread postby Brenden » 8 February 2020, 23:25

Then I guess I meant financial manager. :shrug:
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Re: What made you laugh today?

Unread postby Derek » 8 February 2020, 23:28

Hey, it's a big difference! Financial managers tell you how to spend your money. Accountants just tell you how much money you have.
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Re: What made you laugh today?

Unread postby poolerboy0077 » 9 February 2020, 08:18

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Blow: "Nowadays even Liam can release an album of his screechy vocals and it'll probably go #1..."
Ramzus: I can admit that I'm horny just about 24/7
homomorphism: I used to not think your name was deshay and that Erick was just being racist
Hunter: sometimes I think I was literally born to be a pornstar
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Re: What made you laugh today?

Unread postby Magic J » 9 February 2020, 12:35



"It didn't seem like a Nazi march to me. Some people had dogs. Really nice dogs!"

"Hitler liked dogs."

:lol:
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Re: What made you laugh today?

Unread postby Jzone » 11 February 2020, 03:08

I don't imagine this ended well for either of them...

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Re: What made you laugh today?

Unread postby John27 » 11 February 2020, 09:38

Came across a crossword puzzle I was working on recently. It had as a theme possible comments one might see online in 1 star business reviews. My favorite was for a bakery: "BUNS OF STEEL."
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Re: What made you laugh today?

Unread postby Magic J » 11 February 2020, 19:50

René wrote:He's cute.

Well then, check this out. Man's been working out.

Limmy's seriously fucking lost it. Are ye oan somethin', son?

Back oan the smack wi' a bairn an aw. Shameful, Limmy.
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Re: What made you laugh today?

Unread postby René » 11 February 2020, 19:57

I don't understand what's going on anymore :(
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Re: What made you laugh today?

Unread postby Magic J » 11 February 2020, 20:05

René wrote:I don't understand what's going on anymore :(

With regards to Limmy, or just in general?

If this is your first existential crisis, encounter with the Absurd, or angst attack, then please remain calm. Or don't. The universe really doesn't care. :P
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Re: What made you laugh today?

Unread postby René » 11 February 2020, 20:11

Just the former, for I am the very picture of psychological stability.
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Re: What made you laugh today?

Unread postby Brenden » 11 February 2020, 20:49

René wrote:Just the former, for I am the very picture of psychological stability.

You missed an opportunity for a beautiful alliteration and cultural reference: you are the very model of mental mastery.
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Re: What made you laugh today?

Unread postby Brenden » 11 February 2020, 23:05

I think Gritter Thunberg may have just passed by!
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