Hello I am Gay and ai am Married

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Hello I am Gay and ai am Married

Unread postby Heart1 » 28 July 2020, 14:25

Hi Folks thank you for letting me join this forum on the advice of my doctor. I am gay and been so since 1976 during the hot summer. My name is Will and I am 63 this year. I have a big heart and I have been married since 1980. I have met men over the last 15 years and I enjoy the close contact of men who aporeciate my body and soul. I do love my wife and grand kids but Iwant to my life to be happy and to be honest I want to make the most of life can give. Is there anyone who can help me in the Wellington part of Somerset. ? X
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Re: Hello I am Gay and ai am Married

Unread postby xeta » 28 July 2020, 16:53

Hello Will, welcome to the forum.

What a difficult situation for you. Before we can help you, what is it that you want? You think about coming out? Since the doctor recommended this forum I guess you are really struggling and hurt. I seriously feel for you. Keep in mind that you are not alone. I don’t say its going to be easy, but at least we are here to support, listen and try to give advice. I think many people here are willing to help.

Again, welcome!
Acceptance doesn't mean resignation; it means understanding that something is what it is and that there's got to be a way through it.
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Re: Hello I am Gay and ai am Married

Unread postby biguy87 » 28 July 2020, 19:13

Hi Will. Welcome!

I'm assuming your doctor has advised this so that you have like minded people to talk to. I don't know of anyone on here in or near Somerset but there are certainly lots of great guys who are ready and willing to listen and advise.
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Re: Hello I am Gay and ai am Married

Unread postby Heart1 » 28 July 2020, 19:31

Thank you for your help,.I t is difficult to deal with as I am feeling trapped and wanting at the same time. I married as you know and thought this would stop any thoughts of continuing to struggle with being gay.My father knew I was and always called me a nancy boy or poof. But overthe years I have began to feel astronger bond towards being gay and told my doctor who has readily supported me. I am now the only one alive from my parents and sister. So I cant chat to my sister about it. I have abig heart and want to continue as grandfather , But the one thing I am missing is a close relationship phyiscal one with someone will hopefully understand my situation.I can give love and also cheerish it. I have a big heart that has been cracked before xx
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Re: Hello I am Gay and ai am Married

Unread postby Brenden » 28 July 2020, 19:36

I feel so sorry for your poor wife.
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Re: Hello I am Gay and ai am Married

Unread postby Heart1 » 28 July 2020, 19:46

Brendon you are not helping
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Re: Hello I am Gay and ai am Married

Unread postby Brenden » 28 July 2020, 19:55

Does your wife know you cheat on her with men? Do you know your HIV status? Does she? What about other STIs? How many have you given her?
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Re: Hello I am Gay and ai am Married

Unread postby xeta » 28 July 2020, 20:06

Brenden wrote:Does your wife know you cheat on her with men? Do you know your HIV status? Does she? What about other STIs? How many have you given her?


I must agree on this one.....
Acceptance doesn't mean resignation; it means understanding that something is what it is and that there's got to be a way through it.
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Re: Hello I am Gay and ai am Married

Unread postby Jzone » 29 July 2020, 01:01

Heart1— If expressing yourself here can be a part of your self-acceptance and healing, this forum can support you. As Brenden implied, however, if your healing may be harming someone else that is not something to support. The world was a different place in 1980, but you made a choice that has consequences. I made a similar choice to marry a woman and raise children before I allowed myself to explore my sexuality fully. I did not have relations with men until after divorce. My (young adult) children and most of my family met the man who loved me. That relationship came to an end, but the people who matter to me know me more fully now.

Change may get more challenging as we get older, but you and your family will be better off if you are honest with them. That is the only way for your big heart to be truly free.
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