Being Gay with mental illness

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Being Gay with mental illness

Unread postby Koftruecross » 23 April 2019, 06:24

Being Gay in the Mental hospital was easier than on the outside because we were locked in a state of virtual unreality. I had fellow male and female inmates come on to me. The worst one was Lloyd. He tied his mother to a chair and set her house on fire. Fortunately she was able to escape. The court deemed him so dangerous the judge and lawyers brought the court to the mental hospital and they held a court hearing right there in our occupational therapy room. I wasn't afraid of Loyd because he was actually a bit of a cream puff. So I wasn't afraid to rebuff his unwanted advances.
I used to cut myself with razor blades in order to get locked back up in there. Cuts had to be deep enough for stitches or they wouldn't take me back in. And cutting myself made me feel good. Sounds bizarre I know. But inside it made perfect sense to me and my fellow inmates. I was NOT the only one that did things to get thrown back in. It was the same group of people in and out like a revolving door. It took a lot of therapeutic prodding before I realized that living outside is not necessary a bad thing. Even now I sometimes think if my life takes a turn for the worst I can always go to the mental hospital.. One time the locks on the doors malfunctioned and only ONE of us escaped. And even she came back later and asked to be let back in. All my friends were in there. Sometimes we were like, "Lets get locked in at the same time." Because they would not allow former inmates to visit other inmates inside. I would meet a guy in there and when we were released we would hook up and have sex. Never had sex inside. Not possible. Staff was always watching.
Koftruecross
 
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