I'm gay but I found happiness with a woman , don't give up

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I'm gay but I found happiness with a woman , don't give up

Unread postby Criston Green » 6 January 2020, 06:46

Hello,

I've since been out of my last relationship and I've met a woman who is my friend, but we're becoming close in a more than platonic way. It's different, its more than friends and She knows I'm gay. We are connecting in a very "We're both just people" kind of way. I have strong feelings toward her and the amount of love and good emotion I feel toward her is more than I can put into words. She's so kind to me and very respectful and it feels so good to be treated like a valuable person for once. I actually cried tears of joy the other day and I really cant say enough how loved I feel.

She has had a hard road, her last three boyfriends were super abusive, she got pregnant three times and was pressured into getting abortions and her last boyfriend got her hooked on drugs and intimidated her into selling them.

My last boyfriend was just interested in a sexual relationship and so were those before him. Like many of you, I didn't have a loving childhood and I'm learning disabled too. I didn't get a much love and the stigma of being in Special Education was bad. I've spend a long time feeling like less of person and just inferior. I made three suicide attempts when I was a teenager and I've had lifelong depression. More than anyone has before, she just understands me and treats me how I would like to be treated. She so sweet but she has had bad luck, and she has a big heart. She's so smart too.

Her grandmother who doesn't know I'm gay introduced her to me, thinking I was a nice guy and a potential boyfriend. When I met her, I was honest with her and she was okay just being friends, she needed one.

She asked to kiss me the other day and we did, it was good in a strange way. She liked and and I liked that I was able to do something for her. We're going to try actually being together. She told me that she'd we like to have a more physical relationship, when and if I'm ready. I really feel like I could try. We getting ready to live together.

I'm happy, you know? I had almost given up and I just wanted to share this with anybody that may be feeling like I was. Don't hurt yourself or be down on yourself. I never thought that a woman would be so good to me, :heart: somebody out there will love you for who you are. :heart:
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Re: I'm gay but I found happiness with a woman , don't give up

Unread postby Brenden » 6 January 2020, 06:52

Well, I'm happy for you! :)

But,
Criston Green wrote:Like many of you, I didn't have a loving childhood and I'm learning disabled too.

That's a very presumptive statement.

Criston Green wrote:I'm happy, you know? I had almost given up and I just wanted to share this with anybody that may be feeling like I was. Don't hurt yourself or be down on yourself. I never thought that a woman would be so good to me, :heart: somebody out there will love you for who you are. :heart:

That somebody could be of the same-sex, too! ;)

You seem to be making an assumption that same-sex relationships are always just sexual in nature or emotionally flawed or something.
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Re: I'm gay but I found happiness with a woman , don't give up

Unread postby Criston Green » 6 January 2020, 07:11

I mean having a tough childhood, not learning disabled. In my experience, I've know many gay men that had very hostile childhoods.
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Re: I'm gay but I found happiness with a woman , don't give up

Unread postby Brenden » 6 January 2020, 07:12

Yeah, and it's still a presumptive statement.
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PostThis post was deleted by René on 6 January 2020, 07:17.

Re: I'm gay but I found happiness with a woman , don't give up

Unread postby GearFetTwinkRomance » 6 January 2020, 17:21

Criston Green wrote:I mean having a tough childhood, not learning disabled. In my experience, I've know many gay men that had very hostile childhoods.


Same here, my childhood was rather horrible, all the violence from various sources, special school, church people, villagers, parents, strangers and the brother into fascism. Yet I beat depression embracing sports. I have quite a few women for pen pals and surf 'mates'. One of them I wrote things to, my mother and father never would know about. She's like my chosen sister of sorts, we write from 1997 on.
Though, orientation wise I'm attracted to rare a type of guys only.

Sounds nice you found happiness with the girl there. Maybe you're bisexual a wee bit and have not had the chance to find out so far. Yet making this "many of you" thought go out, always is like a merry wild guess away.
If ya want to hang with me, let's go windsurfing!
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Re: I'm gay but I found happiness with a woman , don't give up

Unread postby mxguy01 » 6 January 2020, 17:29

Here's the thing to ask yourself. Say you meet the perfect guy (close enough should do as you seem to be willing to make trade offs which is understandable) while still being with this woman?
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Re: I'm gay but I found happiness with a woman , don't give up

Unread postby Subra » 7 January 2020, 12:33

Maybe you're bi and not gay?
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Re: I'm gay but I found happiness with a woman , don't give up

Unread postby Frigid » 10 January 2020, 09:45

Don’t give up what, exactly?
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Re: I'm gay but I found happiness with a woman , don't give up

Unread postby MattPSmith » 12 January 2020, 14:29

As a bi man who has been married to a woman for 12 years and just came on here looking for help, i would say that if you are gay and not bi that being in a sexual relationship with a woman who is already emotionally damaged will hurt her (and you) far more in the long run then just being good friends
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