It was just like a movie....

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It was just like a movie....

Unread postby travellerguy » 17 July 2022, 16:24

Hey everyone,

I'm new here and will be happy to get some advise from you guys,
A year and a half ago I met one guy and that changed and thrilled my life, to new heights that I didn’t feel much before, and since I’m quiet emotional guy, it had a big impact on me.
‘Hey, how are you doing ?’ he sent a message in the dating app when I was travelling in the country he migrated to with his family, and that I like so much. Quickly the messages turned to conversations longer and longer ones. Our age gap didn’t feel any obstacle – he is in his early 20’s and 25 years gap separates between us. We shared so much in common like views about life, experience in gay life, common culture, help for people in need and maybe the most important – we are coming from extremely enemy sides of the map – he is from one muslim country and I’m from the other side– maybe the biggest enemies that I could ever imagine, and this point showed me how open, tolerant, curious, courage and accepting he is, and I liked it so much. At the end of the day people are people and we share cultures and similarities much more than the gaps between us. We met in his city and we had a wonderful evening together, sharing a lot. The next day morning I took off to the mountains and he stayed in his city.
I wanted to keep in touch and I was happy to see that he wants too, and we kept in touch every day – he knows a lot about me and I know about him, and I was happy to find out more shared interests like minimalism in life, adventure seeking, nature loving and much more. A horrible and violent war that started after our first meeting, not only didn’t separate us but got us closer, and suddenly I heard personal stories from the other side. Amazing how connections can cross so much boundaries, and he is so mature for his age.
We met again at his country and had a wonderful few days trip and then another trip, for a cosmetic procedure that we both wanted to do. I helped him a lot – in that procedure and in other stuff. He was thankful for that. Still – he said few times that our connection is purely friendly – he is not interested in relationship with me because of various reasons – age gap, he is very young and not looking for one now, he is attracted to different look and more. I understood it although maybe only in my head but not in my mind. He said that few times.
Slowly our connection tighten, and we communicated every day, few times a day. We decided to go on a backpacking trip to south-east Asian country, for 5 weeks. He got so excited as it’s his first trip abroad, for me I had dozens of trips before and still I was excited too. I only asked him that during the trip – we should be travelling together and hopefully not meet someone else and continue the trip separately.
We went there and the trip was wonderful – we both enjoyed it so much – waterfalls, temples, night markets, jungles, tropical beaches and so much more. He said that he will remember this trip for the end of his life, as if we would not meet, maybe he would not be able to go for it. He is coming from a poor background and I paid for most of his trip, and I got a lot of experience backpacking and he enjoyed his experience. We had also great conversations and fun.
All was good till he discovered the gay apps – he started to meet guys for the night – 4 times he met someone for the whole night. I must admit – he did it respectfully and always went to meet the guy after I went to sleep and came back early morning and we continued the day as planned. Still – when he came back, he would not tell anything (in order not to hurt me) and I asked a lot of questions about how was it and I felt a knife turning in my stomach as I still felt emotions towards him as our connection was so good. One time we went to a gay club, there were lots of guys there and in few minutes he started dancing with one guy, his hands on his laps. I could not bare the situation and I left the place to the hotel. The next morning, when I woke up and left the hotel, I saw him coming back from that long night and I felt so bad, thinking about what was happening at night.
We talked lengthy about it and he said that he enjoyed so much meeting other gay guy for the night but we are still very good friends, and he would never continue the trip with someone else that he met for the night. Still for me it hurt a lot.
We came back to his home town, where his family invited me for lunch (he told them a lot about me and how he is proud of me and how good our friendship is) and we all went to the beach, talking about how our countries are huge enemies but we are really good friends. It was a wonderful day.
The day before I left back home, after he started thinking about the next country we would go together to backpack there. I liked this idea, very much. Yet, I told him : ‘Listen, I need to heal my broken heart, I feel still very attached and emotionally involved with you and I would like to disconnect for some time, till I heal and then we can get in touch together again and even travel again’.
‘Is this how you feel ?’ he asked. ‘Yes’ I answered. ‘So I totally understand. Take your time. Call me when you feel better. I hope our friendship will last forever’ he said.
I left and came back home. It’s 5 days since, and time does help to put things in proportions, for sure. It’s not as painful as I felt when we were together. Now I wonder if I should contact him ? Plan a trip with him ? I told him that if we travel again, we will set exact expectations like not meeting other guys when we are together but only if we split for few days, and he agreed.
What do you think ?
I’ll be happy to hear.
Thanks for the advise.

O.
travellerguy
 
Posts: 2
Joined: 17 July 2022, 16:16

Re: It was just like a movie....

Unread postby travellerguy » 17 July 2022, 16:25

...And this is the song that reminds me all of the above:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZiAr6O9x-ZU
travellerguy
 
Posts: 2
Joined: 17 July 2022, 16:16


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