Lost, Lonely and Bewildered

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Lost, Lonely and Bewildered

Unread postby 7 of 9 » 26 February 2019, 20:16

Hello everyone,

I'm not a social media or forum person but I've found this site and hope for "insight" or suggestions.

I've been in my relationship for 18 years. Although my partner and I have lived in large cities with vibrant gay scenes we currently live very rural. At least two hours to a major city. We work from home and hence haven't met any people to socialize with. While my partner is more of a hermit I tend to be gregarious.

My partner was diagnosed with cancer three months before my mom died of cancer. My world is very chaotic right now.

There's a gay man in a retail shop close by and I'm desperate to befriend him. Its weird because I don't even know if we'd get along. I just yearn for a friend outside of my marriage. I love my partner very much and will never leave him. Is it appropriate to try to befriend someone while he is battling cancer?

Thank you.
7 of 9
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Re: Lost, Lonely and Bewildered

Unread postby Eryx » 26 February 2019, 20:42

Welcome! I guess it depends on what your intentions are with him. You told us you love him very much and will never leave him, so I'm assuming friendship is all you're seeking. In that case, I don't think so! Everyone can use a few friends, especially in a new place. I don't think you seeking out a different kind of relationship equates abandoning him or not caring for him at a difficult time. You need to cope too, even if you're not the one who's sick. At least that's what I think.

And maybe, if you do become friends with this person, you could introduce him to your partner. I know you said he's more secluded, but maybe he could also use someone else to talk to about his current issues and life in general, just to vent.

Good luck to him and a speedy recovery. Hope you two stay well :)

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