Marry Him?

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Marry Him?

Unread postby littlebat » 12 February 2020, 02:46

Hi. I'm currently studying in the UK and I met this Welsh daddy on Jack'd since October. He's fine-looking, fit and has two stable jobs. We met and had dinner every Sunday. He drove 1.5 hours everytime just to come to see me. I insisted on paying separately but he always asked to pay for me. The only time I allowed it was after an exam; he says that is a celebration.

Last Christmas, he invited me to spend the holiday with him at his place. He snore really loud so I slept in the living room. On Christmas I woke up seeing a mountain of gifts; I've never received so many presents all Christmas in my life.

I've told him I'm a sadist and a side (no anal) since we've first met. He says he's versatile but we never had anal. One night he took me to an Italian restaurant and I drank a glass of rose wine. It was my first time drinking wine; I got tipsy and laughed on the way to the car. Then we went back to my University accommodation and I got horny. He put a condom on me and I fucked him really hard, in three positions he recalled. Then I got sober and was very embarrassed.

Afterwards our relationship became awkward. Few weeks later I told him I belong to the BDSM community and I hope we go back to being friends. He was very, very sad and went home.

He didn't stop texting me and we got back together again one day.

On one recent visit he prosed to me; as he always wanted to go to New Zealand to start a new life (he already got a job offer there), he'll marry me and take me there to live with him. He'll support me until I find a job there. I told him to give me some time and think about it; it's the biggest decision ever in my life.

I really like the UK and I want to stay, having to find a job in order to do so; at the same time I feel like if I let this guy go, I'll never meet someone who loves me like that again...

What should I do?
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Re: Marry Him?

Unread postby NobodySpecial » 12 February 2020, 12:16

He sounds like a wonderful man. He seems to have a big heart. When you meet a guy with that much caring who gives you his ass,, he probably does it because how much he cares for you -- as opposed to just being a slut who will take any cock...

In other posts, you said you don't care for anal. Likewise, you are 23, like where you are (UK), and are more into BDSM. You don't mention his age, but labeling him a "daddy" makes me think he is at least 10 years older. Do you two have much in common? Note that a long term relationship is more about intimacy than "intensity". Romantic dates can be great, but long term is simply about spending time together doing mundane living together stuff. If you don't have much in common, you might find yourself getting bored.

I also think perhaps he is a bit lonely having lavished so much on you in such a short amount of time. Will he be ok with the BDSM, or will he simply go along with it because it makes you happy? Also just how far do you go into that lifestyle since you are only 23? He wants a lover, do you? Or do you want some kind of slave?

Bottom line, he sounds like a great catch, but is he a great catch for YOU?... Good luck on making your decision.
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Re: Marry Him?

Unread postby mxguy01 » 12 February 2020, 16:45

NobodySpecial wrote:... but long term is simply about spending time together doing mundane living together stuff...


Funny because I think of that as partially correct and also totally incorrect. Mundane? One might assume that but from my perspective to this day it was anything but mundane. Even the end is/was quite spectacular LoL. Oh the serious side though, it went by so fast. Does mundane go by so fast? Hell no. The things we shared in life, the way we lived, no doubt anything but. Now add two kids, haha. If you think that was mundane. I have always said "kids were the hardest thing in my life AND they were the best thing in my life". We were both ok with that as we were so much in alignment with each other all our lives. Me! Who do I make friends with that easily; let alone take it to the level of partner. It simply just worked. Oh, remove the kids from the equation and I would say that about my whole relationship with my ex. I think we just simply went to the next phase of our lives together with the kids. Everything was still good. I think we both seen that past kids, it simply was not working for us anymore. I wouldn't consider a second of it mundane nor would I undo any single thing. The past is the past. Well, if you stuck with that paragraph or if you read these last words -

not mundane at all.
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Re: Marry Him?

Unread postby Frigid » 12 February 2020, 18:10

Is this real?
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Re: Marry Him?

Unread postby René » 12 February 2020, 18:11

Frigid wrote:Is this real?

Somehow, I believe so.
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Re: Marry Him?

Unread postby Eryx » 12 February 2020, 19:57

This is way too fast to move countries.
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Re: Marry Him?

Unread postby Capt._Trips » 13 February 2020, 00:46

How long have you known this guy exactly?
There isnt enough information to really offer much advice.
Is a long distance relationship not an option?

Based on what you've written so far I'd say never settle unless it's something you want to do. No one here could ever tell you what you should do. Only you can make YOUR life decisions like that.

My initial answer is hell no don't marry a guy in fear of losing them. He does sound sweet but i think it's a pretty shitty thing to do to put you on the spot like that.

Good luck no matter what though.
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Re: Marry Him?

Unread postby Eryx » 13 February 2020, 01:40

Not to mention he's into different things than you, and would probably grow frustrated that you're not interested in all the same stuff as him. That's what it seemed like from what you shared anyway.
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Re: Marry Him?

Unread postby Subra » 13 February 2020, 14:27

Frigid wrote:Is this real?

In gay world.
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Re: Marry Him?

Unread postby Brenden » 13 February 2020, 14:37

It sounds really transactional. Like, him buying you so many Christmas presents and always paying for dinners out, and then asking to marry him and wanting you to drop everything and move to a new country where he'd (continue) supporting you financially.
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Re: Marry Him?

Unread postby Eryx » 13 February 2020, 14:53

And eventually he'd have to do everything the guy wants because "I gave you all this stuff and you can't even do this for me?"
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