Need some advice

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Need some advice

Unread postby Plantguy » 26 March 2019, 02:15

So I am not currently in a relationship but I do have a question related to them. So I have super low self-esteem when it comes to my body, personality, and my life in general due to past struggles. Whenever I see gay guys either in public or online and I talk to them or just see them they look so perfect. They are fit or athletic, handsome, great personalities, confident, and it doesn't seem like they have any baggage. Has anyone else ever experienced this where they just don't fit in with the rest and don't feel like they ever will or is it just me? I know that people who I talk to don't need to know my life unless they care or whatever but I've made scars on my body that make my past impossible to cover up. Please feel free to ask any questions and respond. Thanks!
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Re: Need some advice

Unread postby Eryx » 27 March 2019, 02:07

Hey! I think that's not exclusive to gay guys. Everyone sees other people and thinks they're successful, attractive, and doing better than us. We struggle to see other peoples' personal demons and hardships. The grass is always greener.

Truth is, a lot of us are insecure, and it's a common theme for gay guys to experience low self-esteem with all the abuse and the hiding we have to go through in our lives. It's something you need to work on individually, by working on your body, your mind and your goals. The gay guys who are fit and athletic out there had to start from somewhere, you know?

As for being attractive and with great personalities, well, that isn't really true and you know it, right? Sure, there are gorgeous guys out there and the fact that gay guys pay a little more attention to their appearance than our counterparts certainly helps, but gay men come in all shapes and sizes. And some of them are really terrible people, too.

If you don't feel like you're going to fit in with the guys you think are above you, then stop trying to. Look for people you feel comfortable around. They don't even have to be gay. Once you feel like you have a circle of people around you that props you up, that you're moving forward with your life and that you're working on being always healthier, the self-esteem problems will probably get better and you won't feel so out of place anymore.
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