One sided love.

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One sided love.

Unread postby Lonely2989 » 2 July 2019, 14:00

Hey all.. I am from india age 30.gay single as i can say now.. I am going through a pretty tragic heartbreak. I met him last month via grindr. He is smart stunning so at first i thought after seeing me he might reject me as i dont have much attractive features. Avarage looking avarage build guy i am. But he continued our conversation. Then one day he called me at his place to meet him. Like a date. He lived bit far but i visited him though i was hesitant at first. But finally i met him he brought me at his place.. He was so caring offered me breakfast as i haven't had breakfast but couldn't tell him as i am bit shy in nature. But he sensed it and gave me breakfast. Even at one time he feed me by his own hand.i felt so good that i never have felt. Then we talked a few hours more. He is super handsome marvelous. But suddenly he jumped on me and initiate the sex. Took my virginity. It was amazing. He said he wants me. I came back frm there that day but he still keep messeging me. I couldn't spend the night there because he had to go somewhere else for his official work. From that everyday he used to call me after office for a chat. Then two weeks earlier from now he had his birthday. So i bought a gift for him. And met him. That everything was as usually smooth between us. Normal conversation then sex. Everything happened. Outing in his bike.. He let me hold him tightly while riding the bike. I felt so good that day.. Then we spend night togather. Next day he almost bring back to my place.. And went back. And also promised me to seeing me everyweek. I was very happy to hear that. Everything was fine untill the last wednesday.. Since last wednesday he stopped calling me. Stopped replying me. If i consistently messege him he will reply only one or two. He doesn't even want to talk with me. If i request only then he picks up or talk. But only for 5-10 mins. While we were in constant chat he showed a love sign after our furst encounter. But now nothing.. Doesn't even care to reply. I am very very heartbroken now.. I can't forget him. Crying all the time whenever i get some space. I just want to know what happened that changed everything. I am feeling frustrated now.. What should i do.. Can't even sleep properly or eat or drink.. Feeling like my life ended. I have deleted all the dating apps after meeting him.. Now even if i need to reinstall it again.. But my mind is not allowing me. I just cry for him. All the time. What should i do... Please help me to get out of this pain..
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Re: One sided love.

Unread postby Eryx » 2 July 2019, 15:01

All you can do now is give it time. Even if he tells you exactly why he grew more distant, that closure is probably not going to help with the pain you're feeling all that much. The only way out of a heartbreak is for it to fall into the past.
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Re: One sided love.

Unread postby Lonely2989 » 3 July 2019, 16:34

Thanks eryx. For your suggestion. But its very very painful for me to thinking about forgetting him.. Forgetting the time we spent together. I never had this feeling before. I met guys before but they never invited me to their places or met me after our first meet. I am not open to my family.. So i can't share this to my family. All the time from waking up to going to bed only his name comes in my mind. I see his face all the time. I pray to god to bring him back to my life again.its becoming unbearable for me. I can not even think about moving on. I am so frustrated. Don't know what made him upset about me that he stopped replying. I can't change my looks because its inborn. If i go for surgery then its very very unaffordable for me. Sometimes i cry in my office bathroom thinking about him. Just a month and it seemed over. Can't even think about dating again.. I am one man's man.. Do not like promiscuos nature. Don't know how will this deep wound heal. Just can not accept that fact that we are not togather anymore
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Re: One sided love.

Unread postby erti » 3 July 2019, 16:55

I've dated a guy from when I was 18 up until I was almost 24 years old. It' s hard. I'm 29 years old now. We hardly talk anymore. I slowly got over it. We were going to marry. We were possibly going to have kids. I thought I we were in love but he broke up with me at an anime convention out of anxiety. Surely if he cared about how I felt he'd do it at a better time and place. Then we continued to have a sexual relationship. I fooled myself into thinking if I had sex with him enough he'd want to get back with me. Boy was I wrong. I felt crushed when he started looking for other women. Then he got together with his current girlfriend. I cried... but I got over it. It's apart of life... your heart is going to be broken so many times in your life until you find someone who you can share your life with and be true together. Sometimes people will never find that someone but you have to accept that as a possibility. You gotta love yourself first. It's going to hurt, possibly for a while but you can't dwell on it for too long. It took a long time for me to accept it.. Now that I accept it, it's a lot easier talking to him. It's a lot easier to accept his girlfriend and their relationship. We're still friends but sometimes people find it easier to cut off contact in order to heal. You may need to do that for a while.
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Re: One sided love.

Unread postby Eryx » 3 July 2019, 17:55

What you're feeling is something almost everyone on this planet has had to deal with at least once. I've had my heart broken more than a couple of times, most people have. If you put yourself out there to date guys, this is bound to happen. So you need to be strong and understand that these feelings will pass. He's not going to be the only man for you, and if he was the right man for you, he'd still be with you.

I know it seems impossible to forget him now and get through this, but it is possible and you can get through it. In not too long, this will be nothing but a lesson.
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Re: One sided love.

Unread postby Lonely2989 » 4 July 2019, 16:32

Thank you both of you.. You are much experienced in this case. For me it was the first time. Felt like i can hold him for the rest of my life. But right now i can't go back to the dating scene. I am tormented. Totally confused heartbroken. Feeling like missing something in my soul. Loving someone desparately and not getting love in return is the most terrible thing in this world i can feel now. What happened to those promises he made me. I don't know if i would get ever anybody who will love me the way i will love him. When i see my friends who got lovers, spending time togather.. Share pics over facebook..i feel very very lonely.. Even when i walk on the road.. I feel if there could be someone like him who can walk beside me. But no i am as lonely as a desert..
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Re: One sided love.

Unread postby erti » 4 July 2019, 16:44

I can understand having friend who are in relationships and you're not. It's hard seeing them seemingly happy and have their shit together. I had a crush on this guy and actually have had sex with him but he didn't share the same feelings as I did. Now he's with someone he likes and it got me thinking, "what's wrong with me?" but there's nothing wrong with me. He was just not the one. Don't let it ruin your self confidence. You'll get to a place where you can find someone else. Maybe not today or tomorrow but someday. You'll be alright :)
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Re: One sided love.

Unread postby Eryx » 4 July 2019, 21:41

Lonely2989 wrote:I don't know if i would get ever anybody who will love me the way i will love him.
You will, trust me.
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Re: One sided love.

Unread postby Lonely2989 » 6 July 2019, 07:12

Thank you very much for your kind support my friends. I feel very lonely here where i live.for my job. Far away from my home. He came in my life like fresh air. And made me float like the falling leaves. Never felt so happy till now.. But didn't last. But getting hope from you guys. Thank you again. This path of my life is lonely. Might get a hand of someone to walk tagather in future i hope. Thank you so much.. ❤️❤️
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Re: One sided love.

Unread postby Eryx » 8 July 2019, 05:05

Stick around, and we'll be always happy to talk to you!
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Re: One sided love.

Unread postby poolerboy0077 » 8 July 2019, 05:48

One-sided love. Hmm. That basically describes all my interactions with the twinks on these forums.
Blow: "Nowadays even Liam can release an album of his screechy vocals and it'll probably go #1..."
Ramzus: I can admit that I'm horny just about 24/7
homomorphism: I used to not think your name was deshay and that Erick was just being racist
Hunter: sometimes I think I was literally born to be a pornstar
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Re: One sided love.

Unread postby Jryski » 9 July 2019, 02:26

poolerboy0077 wrote:One-sided love. Hmm. That basically describes all my interactions with the twinks on these forums.

Awwww :( *hugs*
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Re: One sided love.

Unread postby Jryski » 9 July 2019, 02:31

Lonely2989 wrote:Thank you very much for your kind support my friends. I feel very lonely here where i live.for my job. Far away from my home. He came in my life like fresh air. And made me float like the falling leaves. Never felt so happy till now.. But didn't last. But getting hope from you guys. Thank you again. This path of my life is lonely. Might get a hand of someone to walk tagather in future i hope. Thank you so much.. ❤️❤️

I think what you're describing happens to everyone lots of times over and over again. Pretty much the same thing happened to me with the guy I lost my virginity to. I quickly realized that I was being naive for liking someone so much just because they found me slightly attractive. *hugs* feel better dude. Don't let boys hurt your feelings. But if they do end up hurting your feelings, just remember that boys have this thing called a bulge. Punch it!
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Re: One sided love.

Unread postby Lonely2989 » 10 July 2019, 03:02

Thank you all of you for your kind replies. I am pretty much distorted mentally by that unexpected breakup. Now i really fear to date again. Because coping with this situation is unbearable. Can't forget him. I am missing him a lot.. Don't know how long this problem will stay
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