Open relationships

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Open relationships

Unread postby Wackyzackyz » 10 April 2021, 08:16

Hi guys, so I have a question. Specifically for guys who are in open relationships.

Background info: me and my partner will of been together for 10 years this summer, when we got together I was young and pretty naive, I believed sex was something that only two people who loved each other should do, and disagreed with one night stands and hookups.
  So my partner is the only person I have ever slept with, as he was My first and only boyfriend. My views on sex now are completely different as I've grown older and my eyes have opened a bit more.
  I still love my partner and we still have a healthy sex life for a couple of ten years, however I grow more and more 'thirst' for other guys I see. I would never cheat on my partner, but I am interested in suggesting to him about maybe opening our relationship.

So my question is, how do I approach this subject with him without offending him or upsetting him?
And if you're in an open relationship how did yours form, from the get go?
Or something you decided late on in your relationship?

Thanks
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Re: Open relationships

Unread postby René » 18 April 2021, 01:14

Wackyzackyz wrote:me and my partner will of been together for 10 years this summer, when we got together I was young and pretty naive, I believed sex was something that only two people who loved each other should do, and disagreed with one night stands and hookups.
  So my partner is the only person I have ever slept with, as he was My first and only boyfriend.

I don't think it's naïve. That's largely my view, except I'm polyamorous so it becomes possibly more than 2 people who love each other. (I've only had sex with two people in my whole life, both of whom I'm with in a now three-way relationship; I hope to grow old with them and never to be with anyone else. :keke:)

Wackyzackyz wrote:I would never cheat on my partner, but I am interested in suggesting to him about maybe opening our relationship.

So my question is, how do I approach this subject with him without offending him or upsetting him?
And if you're in an open relationship how did yours form, from the get go?
Or something you decided late on in your relationship?

I don't have any experience with open relationships, but I know the mere suggestion has been enough to trigger some relationships ending, so be prepared for that if you're not certain how your partner will react. (My husband and I got into polyamory after almost 10 years of marriage (with us likewise both having been virgins when we met and only been with each other until that point), but I already knew he was open to the idea of that. Based on what you've said, I guess your partner hasn't expressed any positive sentiments about open relationships?)

It's also possible he'd be more open to the idea of trying a threesome.

I would be significantly more open to the idea of an open relationship if there weren't STIs out there which can spread even when people don't have any symptoms and are associated with developing serious health problems like cancer and Alzheimer's Disease.
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