Seeking advice!!

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Seeking advice!!

Unread postby free_cantrell » 27 November 2018, 15:36

Over the course of the last 2 months I have been texting with a guy that I met on FB. We have grown to really care about each other. He says that I mean a lot to him and that I make his heart smile, he feels things he has not felt in a long time. We are both in unhappy relationships. We both have said that we wish things were different so that we could be together but I know there are several states between us. If we were to end our relationships, he would go back home to another state and the same for me. I have feelings of love for him brewing, I am not sure about him. Maybe? He recently posted a "happy anniversary" pic with his Husband. The caption was sweet and thanked him for another year of love, and being a soulmate. I asked about this, because I felt lied to and stupid for falling for it. He said Facebook is not always real life. I get it. The day we started texting, he sent a dick pic I liked it but now I wonder if it was so easy for him to send that to me, and I didnt ask for it.. is he doing this with other guys? I asked about this too and he said he doesn’t, that I am the only guy he talks to. He is consuming my thoughts... I am seriously falling for him. He makes me feel wanted.. His last text to me every night as he goes to bed is "see you in my dreams" He is calling me, in his texts Babe and my sweets now...
Should I walk away? Stop talking to him? I am having an emotional affair and reality says that he and I really never will be together due to distance and the fact that both of us are not in a position, currently to leave our relationships.
What do I do...

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Re: Seeking advice!!

Unread postby Felice » 27 November 2018, 15:58

Hi free_cantrell .
I know the feeling of talking to someone online and having feelings for .. or at least in my case some sort of a start of a crush.
But The thing about people online is that MOST of them Lie to get you naked on cam or Get nude pics.
And anyone who send a dick pic without you asking ,is definitely playing .. Especially since he already Has someone to go to ..

I don't normally tell anyone what to do or how to act .But i Think It's best to Not give him any more of your time .. it hurts a bit and it may make your head spin that you are not talking to him, but it's NOT worth it .

Trust me after a while You will be Glad that you cut him off .. It Would only end in tears .. especially since he said "It's not real life"
you won't find me here i'm deleting my account .
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Re: Seeking advice!!

Unread postby PopTart » 27 November 2018, 17:04

There is one telling detail, you met him on FB and he himself has said, facebook isn't always real life. He has a real life, with his husband, what he has with you, sounds like a distraction, something to titilate and excite.

Perhaps he is disatisfied, he might crave the attention or some affection that is missing in his relationship, but he has no problem, displaying that affection, be it genuine or rote, to his husband on FB.

I think, at the end of the day, the guy is taken. As are you, if either of you were really serious, I think, you'd both be more than willing to end the relationships you were unhappy in and do whatever you needed to, to be together.

But neither of you have. If your unhappy in your current relationship, I'd encourage you to confront that and either work on your relationship or walk away from it. I can't imagine anything worse than staying in a relationship that you are unhappy in, for any reason. Financial obligations included.

This guy might be in the same boat as you but that doesn't mean you are an ideal match.

As yourself what it is your unhappy about your current situation. Do you no longer love your partner? Are you just bored?

You could ask this guy the same questions too, but I suspect, that, chances are, he wont have good answers for you.

Also I think it's worth remembering, that any relationship that begins in infidelity, is always going to face a massive challenge regarding trust, once the "newness" has worn off. If he could cheat and be unfaithful with you, while married to his husband, whats to say he wont do the same with someone else, while being commited to you? You will ask that question at some point and you want to be sure that you are secure in any relationship to be able to handle the implications of the question.
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Re: Seeking advice!!

Unread postby Jzone » 27 November 2018, 17:12

Felice and PopTart said it. Work on your relationship or leave your partner if it's not working. Just don't expect to live happily ever after with some fantasy facebook lover.
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