Thoughts on an ex

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Thoughts on an ex

Unread postby Finn » 16 June 2021, 03:57

Decided to take a step back. Thanks All
Last edited by Finn on 16 June 2021, 15:29, edited 1 time in total.
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Re: Thoughts on an ex

Unread postby pozboro » 16 June 2021, 08:10

If there are exes, especially ones still involved in a partner's life, it's pretty hard not to wonder, at least occasionally, even in the best of circumstances. You don't mention being jealous outright, so I'm going to set that possibility aside. Other than the length of your relationship and the statement that you moved to be with this person, it's really hard to say since 1) don't know how much experience you two have being in relationships in general or 2) what kind of spoken agreements and expectations you have both agreed to. So I think a lot of what can be said is either in the realm of "it depends" and "try not to overthink it".

As for using the wrong name - this is not uncommon - think in terms of 1) your partner's age 2) how long they were together and 3) how long they've been apart. Just using someone else's name isn't any crime, especially if one does it when emotionally excited, especially if those two were together for any length of time. I've got a newish dog and yet I've screwed up and called him by a dog's name I had over a decade ago. WTF?!? At least he didn't bite me over it! Levity aside, we all make mistakes.

That said, if it happens regularly then you might have to talk about it. Likewise if "I think my boyfriend still has deep rooted feelings for him." really starts to cause a problem for you. Not going to say anything more since from what little I know it doesn't sound like your there yet. Just keep in mind different minds work differently so there might even be an actual reason the name thing happens and you just don't know all the details. That's why talking (and not when you're upset or angry) is important.

Given what you've said, that's all I've got for you. Good luck!
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