What's going on?

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What's going on?

Unread postby chocochurro » 13 May 2019, 19:55

Hello beautiful peeps!
I met this guy around the half of April, we chatted a couple of days on Grindr and then we went out, had a drink, a nice talk, and then went to my place and had amazing sex - it was really nice, besides the sex there was a great chemistry and also some laughs...
Then I met him the day after to a party during the last part of the night, kissed and stayed together, then each one to his place since it was really late and we were pretty wasted... I was really honest with him after the party, I told him I like him, and I would be interested in having some more dates and know each other - he told me he liked me too but he wanted things to go slowly.
I went on a trip the day after and when I came back I met him again after a week or so, we had dinner, a couple of drinks to his place and then fell between the sheets.
Yesterday I met him to a party again and after we left he texted me to have lunch together today and so we did since our workplaces are very close each other. It was a nice lunch, we talked, had a walk and everything seemed pretty casual.
I know that I can be intense as I need empirical confirmations that somthing is going on, but on the other side, he seems pretty inconsistent, as he never texts at first and we could even not talk for days, then he comes out with lunch invites, but then he does not answer my texts, or if he does it's the day after or more.
He's 41, I'm 33 and surely he broke up with someone don't know when but he mentioned his ex a couple of times already (no big deal to me), and it looks like they stayed together 4-5 years.
The thing is, should I be patient, take it easy and keep going and wait for his times? I really like him, so maybe I already know the answer...but a couple of recommendations would be very appreciated anyway.

Much love!!! :heart:
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Re: What's going on?

Unread postby Jryski » 14 May 2019, 01:19

I don't know dude... A 41 year old fuck boy huh? Im guessin the couple of days you guys don't talk is how long it takes for him to recharge his libido. If you're the one that's initiating conversation every single time then he's not what you want in life.
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Re: What's going on?

Unread postby Eryx » 14 May 2019, 03:48

I don't think you should worry too much. You're closer to my age (26) and my boyfriend is closer to your's age (40). My boyfriend is super weird with texts and keeping in touch, but he's waaaaaaaay more dedicated to being caring and attentive when we're doing things in person. At first, he was really jealous (while he didn't have to be), because we were still getting to know each other and he felt threatened. We worked together at that point, and I was also really weary because I knew him at a personal level while we were both single and his careless behavior worried me a whole lot. He wasn't a boyfriend material at all.

After a while, we worked through those stages and I realized his frequency with texts and long distance communication wasn't on purpose. He's just not wired for it. If I bring him grief for not being available via text, he calls me, he gets worried, he tries to find me to make it clear that it doesn't mean he's uninterested, unavailable or doing something wrong, it's just that he doesn't get the hint.

From what you described, I don't think your guy isn't there, maybe he just interacts with communication in a different way than you. Be patient, for now. If he flakes out more frequently in your paths ahead, then you can be a little more suspicious.

Good luck!!
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Re: What's going on?

Unread postby chocochurro » 14 May 2019, 05:51

Thanks Eryk.
I'll take it that way and be patient. Hope things work out!
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