Who are you out to?

**Mod** · by **Mod** » 2 January 2013, 06:43

The people that know me I guess. Everyone figured when I added Ben as a relationship status and I'd drunkenly told those closest to me before. It's never really come up so I'm not sure who knows and who doesn't these days although NZ's pretty straight foot so between 'intellectual' conversations and discussions of feminism its easy for outsiders to figure.

Sometimes I meet new people who I think are great and I get protective like Ev does and fret over them knowing and distancing themselves but I think that's my innate paranoia than anything else -Besides, living as a hermit means that other people don't have to do much distancing work themselves.

I'm keenly interested in the next year when I'll get my shit together and go out into the world once more.

**Wallace** · by **Wallace** » 2 January 2013, 11:48

Mr.Monkey wrote:NZ's pretty straight foot so between 'intellectual' conversations and discussions of feminism its easy for outsiders to figure.

Oh how nice people associate homosexuals with intellectual conversations and discussions of feminism. Didn't know it's a gay thing.

**Mod** · by **Mod** » 2 January 2013, 11:55

Wallace_Wells wrote:
Mr.Monkey wrote:NZ's pretty straight foot so between 'intellectual' conversations and discussions of feminism its easy for outsiders to figure.

Oh how nice people associate homosexuals with intellectual conversations and discussions of feminism. Didn't know it's a gay thing.

If you aren't talking about rugby or shagging keen sluts it is probably nerdy or gay. Talking about feminism is right up there with veganism. For example the only men that take gender studies at uni are fags* didn't ya know?

*Or lads trying to impress chicks.

**Wallace** · by **Wallace** » 2 January 2013, 12:01

Mr.Monkey wrote:
Wallace_Wells wrote:
Mr.Monkey wrote:NZ's pretty straight foot so between 'intellectual' conversations and discussions of feminism its easy for outsiders to figure.

Oh how nice people associate homosexuals with intellectual conversations and discussions of feminism. Didn't know it's a gay thing.

If you aren't talking about rugby or shagging keen sluts it is probably nerdy or gay.

The amount of shallow straights guys and gay guys are more or less the same, tbh. Only a small number of people (gay and straight) could actually converse such discussions. But yeah, I've yet to meet a straight guy that talks about feminism as passionate as me

**Mod** · by **Mod** » 2 January 2013, 12:17

Wallace_Wells wrote:The amount of shallow straights guys and gay guys are more or less the same, tbh.

Orly? Yeah I kinda knew although there are always more straight people than gays.

Only a small number of people (gay and straight) could actually converse such discussions. But yeah, I've yet to meet a straight guy that talks about feminism as passionate as me

You'd be surprised to both of those.
It's not exactly rare here unless you're talking to many students or focus grouped "middle New Zealand" though to be fair they're a sizeable group. That sort of group calls you gay, arrogant, a tall poppy, egg head and all kindsa words for having an intelligent talk or speech pattern while the older largely white, mid-upper class, business/right wing NZ just calls you a hippy.

**Wallace** · by **Wallace** » 2 January 2013, 12:28

Mr.Monkey wrote:
Wallace_Wells wrote:The amount of shallow straights guys and gay guys are more or less the same, tbh.

Orly? Yeah I kinda knew although there are always more straight people than gays.

Yeah, that's why I have trouble finding the right gay guy cause most of the gays I've met are shallow.

Mr.Monkey wrote:You'd be surprised to both of those.
It's not exactly rare here unless you're talking to many students or focus grouped "middle New Zealand" though to be fair they're a sizeable group. That sort of group calls you gay, arrogant, a tall poppy, egg head and all kindsa words for having an intelligent talk or speech pattern while the older largely white, mid-upper class, business/right wing NZ just calls you a hippy.

Hmm, interesting. I don't know what the society call people who like to have an intellectual conversation here. Never heard any complains really.

Why so much hate from the New Zealanders?

**Mod** · by **Mod** » 2 January 2013, 12:56

Wallace_Wells wrote:Hmm, interesting. I don't know what the society call people who like to have an intellectual conversation here. Never heard any complains really.

Why so much hate from the New Zealanders?

Too many people never quite left High School. They're in a majority so their views were never challenged enough to change and it's too easy to rely on sport/physical prowess. It's like that classic mistake of assuming that everyone at University will be highly driven and responsible only to find that the dicks there getting shitfaced starting fights while reciting "C's get degrees" for their Commerce/Accounting/Communications/Business degree.

I'm bitter -there's a sizeable population of them everywhere and sooner or later they always bother me.

**Eryx** · by **Eryx** » 2 January 2013, 15:58

Now that I told my grandmother (it was a total mess), EVERYONE! Yay!

**Bang** · by **Bang** » 3 January 2013, 01:37

**Xan** · by **Xan** » 3 January 2013, 04:18

All my immediate family, friends I am still in contact with and coworkers know. Some extended family knows, but others don't because I barely ever talk to them. Some old HS friends I have never told, but I think they know through the grapevine at this point.

I have only ever come out to my parents and one friend. Everyone else just found out through observation or someone else telling them. I never liked or felt the need to have "the conversation" with people so I just didn't.

**Brenden** · by **Brenden** » 3 January 2013, 13:21

Bang wrote:
Brenden wrote:
Bang wrote:
Brenden wrote:
Bang wrote:
Brenden wrote:
René wrote:They were all completely fine with it, except for a few cousins who later turned around (and one of whom turned out to be bisexual himself ).

"bisexual"

Did he suck off René?

lol wut?

He's just really gay-acting/looking. I think he's still ashamed of being entirely gay so he's coming out as bi.

In my opinion this is silly. I know a couple masculine gay men but I also know quite a few effeminate heterosexual men. I can't speak for yourself, but I find it ironic when others say they don't enjoy being judged on the outside yet go out of their way to judge others in the same manner they don't wish to be judged in.

Well, there's also the fact he used to say René was sinful and such for being gay, suggesting strong inward issues of his.

His family is more or less religious. I fail to see how these are clear indications about his sexuality. It's all guessing as far as I'm concerned.

His family was more accepting of René than he was. It wasn't him being a parrot. It was him having deep issues with his own sexuality, which I think is entirely gay.

**René** · by **René** » 3 January 2013, 13:59

Brenden wrote:
Bang wrote:
Brenden wrote:
Bang wrote:
Brenden wrote:
Bang wrote:
Brenden wrote:
René wrote:They were all completely fine with it, except for a few cousins who later turned around (and one of whom turned out to be bisexual himself ).

"bisexual"

Did he suck off René?

lol wut?

He's just really gay-acting/looking. I think he's still ashamed of being entirely gay so he's coming out as bi.

In my opinion this is silly. I know a couple masculine gay men but I also know quite a few effeminate heterosexual men. I can't speak for yourself, but I find it ironic when others say they don't enjoy being judged on the outside yet go out of their way to judge others in the same manner they don't wish to be judged in.

Well, there's also the fact he used to say René was sinful and such for being gay, suggesting strong inward issues of his.

His family is more or less religious. I fail to see how these are clear indications about his sexuality. It's all guessing as far as I'm concerned.

His family was more accepting of René than he was. It wasn't him being a parrot. It was him having deep issues with his own sexuality, which I think is entirely gay.

Mhm, even his evangelical Christian mother has always been totally happy for us. This guy has admitted that he used to be anti-gay only because he was fighting his own feelings and hating himself for them. He has never had a girlfriend. I wouldn't be at all surprised if he was gay rather than bisexual.

**larouxfan** · by **larouxfan** » 3 January 2013, 14:52

I'm out to my entire family (including all the aunts, uncles, cousins, etc). As for friends, came out to a few in high school and now if people ask me I won't deny it, and I've told the people who already know that they don't have to treat it as a huge secret either

So I think most people know... I just get the occasional idiot oblivious friend who asks me opinions about girls and whatnot, or the rare homophobic comment in my presence, which is always awkward for me and the rest around me who know xD

**ksk** · by **ksk** » 4 January 2013, 02:04

Almost everybody knows that I am gay. If they are interested to know.

**darwin** · by **darwin** » 4 January 2013, 05:32

Everyone!! (Except my muslim boss and coworkers, but hopefully that will come soon)

No experience has had a more positive influence on my life than coming out. To feel that freedom and liberation can't be explained. No matter how pessimistically you might view the outcome, only good can come in the end from coming out. It's never as bad as you might expect.

**Alex Malfoy** · by **Alex Malfoy** » 4 January 2013, 20:26

My parents and my closest friends.

**rxxli** · by **rxxli** » 4 January 2013, 22:39

A single friend. And even that because I've met him on a gay dating site and we started talking, ... So he knew that I was gay before he knew who I was. Then we actually found out that we are going to the same university. And we became friends then.

And that is it. It would probably help getting out but I am too insecure to do that.

**ThePhilOfIt** · by **ThePhilOfIt** » 6 January 2013, 04:48

Every person on the planet.

Including my psycho uncle, his ADD wife, his uber religious kid, his idiot wife who is so religious she doesn't even know who Cher is, and their kid. EVERYONE. lol

**Mephisto** · by **Mephisto** » 6 January 2013, 15:16

Everyone except my super bestest friend ever.
Awks.

**xyz72** · by **xyz72** » 6 January 2013, 15:48

I got leave from school to get married to my boyfriend. EVERYBODY knows.

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