Bisexual? Pansexual?

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Bisexual? Pansexual?

Unread postby FirstBorn93 » 2 June 2019, 02:12

Hey everyone,
I'm 25 years old from the US , i consider myself straight but i am not 100% sure about my sexuality.
First off i'll start with the fact that i am addicted to porn for 16 years already.
I watch straight , gay and transgender porn.
I might be hypersexual , i have had sex with women , men , transgenders and crossdressers.
I love women , i have no doubt about that , i want to have sex with them and a realtionship with them as well as a family , i love every aspect of sex with them (kissing , cuddling , oral , penetrating) even though i had times i couldn't get hard and i think that's due to my excessive masturbation and porn addiction.
When it comes to transgenders and men the story is different , the times i have been with transgenders i have always been the top , i never got penetrated but i have sucked their cock , we have kissed but it wasn't really enjoyable for me. Not always i have penetrated them , sometimes i wasn't attarcted to them but i was horny and other times i couldn't get hard (might be ED) , guilt and shame followed after the act.
With men it's even less , i can't let them touch my body , i don't kiss , i don't cuddle , i don't penetrate (the only time i was able was with feminine crossdressers) , the only thing i want with men is getting my dick sucked and that's it , nothing more.
I never had a girlfriend but i had lots of sex with prostitues , anonymous hook ups , lots of porn and masturbation , and multiple times of me not being able to get hard.
All of these things made me question my sexuality to the point of me not knowing what the hell is going on? I love women both physically and romantically but then again i had sex with so many men and transgenders , but i don't love it's only for pleasure.
It's hard for me to know , any advice would be helpful , one of the reasons i had so many encounters with gay or transgeder people is because i always enjoy talking to them , you guys are always nice and understanding lol.
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Re: Bisexual? Pansexual?

Unread postby Iamjava » 2 June 2019, 02:57

its story time!

for a long time i considered myself bi. i i had exgirlfriends with limited sexual experiences (turns out they love my hand work); i occasionaly viewed straight porn. on the other hand, up until i was 15, i had a lot of gay sex, but never a relationship. (at 25 i met my current fiance, a man.)

it wasnt until recently i did some deep reflection. outside of porn, women were never able to get me off, i never enjoyed kissing them, boobs were a turnoff and the idea of putting my lips on their parts was revolting. (to be fair, before my fiance eating cum was, too.)

men, on the other hand i enjoy everything about and always have.

from your story, and this is my observation, you sound like me but with women. the porn, i learned, was simply the penetration and the act of sex.

id also like to point out that many many men in straight relationships who later come out as gay had the same erectile problems with women.

my best advice? if men do not make you happy, them stick with women and dont force yourself into situations where both partners end up unhappy.

edit: i appreciate that last compliment, and no matter the outcome i, at least welcome you. (for the record, im a bit of an ass in person; though i have my moments..)
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Re: Bisexual? Pansexual?

Unread postby Jzone » 2 June 2019, 04:14

Welcome, 1stBorn, good to have you here!
FirstBorn93 wrote:I might be hypersexual , i have had sex with women , men , transgenders and crossdressers...
All of these things made me question my sexuality to the point of me not knowing what the hell is going on? I love women both physically and romantically but then again i had sex with so many men and transgenders , but i don't love it's only for pleasure.

My advice regarding the above is to stop trying to force yourself and your sexuality into some predefined label. You are SEXUAL -- let that be enough. You are romantically / sexually attracted to women, and you enjoy having your cock sucked by guys. All good. You want a long-term relationship and family eventually -- great! Until then you are free to explore. No need to limit yourself to one of society's boxes.

It's hard for me to know , any advice would be helpful , one of the reasons i had so many encounters with gay or transgender people is because i always enjoy talking to them , you guys are always nice and understanding lol.

Gays and trans are often more comfortable talking about sexuality than str8s, simply because they have already challenged the norms. I think you will find that on this forum at least. Good luck figuring it all out for yourself. It can be an adventure, as well as a mystery. Just know you are not alone.
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Re: Bisexual? Pansexual?

Unread postby Jryski » 2 June 2019, 08:08

It sounds like you just want to get off. It doesn't matter if you're gay, straight, bi, pan, or whatever but as long as you're comfortable with yourself and see your sexual partner as an actual human being then that's fine. Treat the other person with respect and dignity. If they gross you out then don't get bjs from them. Do feel free to explore with human beings you actually find attractive. It'll make sexual exploration way more enjoyable than just getting off.
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Re: Bisexual? Pansexual?

Unread postby FirstBorn93 » 2 June 2019, 20:11

Iamjava wrote:its story time!

for a long time i considered myself bi. i i had exgirlfriends with limited sexual experiences (turns out they love my hand work); i occasionaly viewed straight porn. on the other hand, up until i was 15, i had a lot of gay sex, but never a relationship. (at 25 i met my current fiance, a man.)

it wasnt until recently i did some deep reflection. outside of porn, women were never able to get me off, i never enjoyed kissing them, boobs were a turnoff and the idea of putting my lips on their parts was revolting. (to be fair, before my fiance eating cum was, too.)

men, on the other hand i enjoy everything about and always have.

from your story, and this is my observation, you sound like me but with women. the porn, i learned, was simply the penetration and the act of sex.

id also like to point out that many many men in straight relationships who later come out as gay had the same erectile problems with women.

my best advice? if men do not make you happy, them stick with women and dont force yourself into situations where both partners end up unhappy.

edit: i appreciate that last compliment, and no matter the outcome i, at least welcome you. (for the record, im a bit of an ass in person; though i have my moments..)



Thank you for reading my post and taking the time to reply.
I know i like women but the horniness that i have which now is hypersexuality is so strong which makes men a perfect option for that.
What i mean by it is that it is incredibly easy to find men online that are willing to give me a bj after a few messages without knowing each other , on the other hand with women it's much more work.

Jzone wrote:Welcome, 1stBorn, good to have you here!
FirstBorn93 wrote:I might be hypersexual , i have had sex with women , men , transgenders and crossdressers...
All of these things made me question my sexuality to the point of me not knowing what the hell is going on? I love women both physically and romantically but then again i had sex with so many men and transgenders , but i don't love it's only for pleasure.

My advice regarding the above is to stop trying to force yourself and your sexuality into some predefined label. You are SEXUAL -- let that be enough. You are romantically / sexually attracted to women, and you enjoy having your cock sucked by guys. All good. You want a long-term relationship and family eventually -- great! Until then you are free to explore. No need to limit yourself to one of society's boxes.

It's hard for me to know , any advice would be helpful , one of the reasons i had so many encounters with gay or transgender people is because i always enjoy talking to them , you guys are always nice and understanding lol.

Gays and trans are often more comfortable talking about sexuality than str8s, simply because they have already challenged the norms. I think you will find that on this forum at least. Good luck figuring it all out for yourself. It can be an adventure, as well as a mystery. Just know you are not alone.


I partially agree with you on the first part , i think that all people have a need to define themselves in some sort of way which forms our overall identity.
The thing here is that by receving oral sex from men is an act that makes it hard for one's self to claim to be straight , it's like eating beef but claiming to be still vegan lol.
And about the second comment i agree , it's always easy to talk about these type of things with gays or trans , so my confusing about my sexuality is i guess a great ice breaker with them plus there are nice people everywhere regardless.
Thank you!

Jryski wrote:It sounds like you just want to get off. It doesn't matter if you're gay, straight, bi, pan, or whatever but as long as you're comfortable with yourself and see your sexual partner as an actual human being then that's fine. Treat the other person with respect and dignity. If they gross you out then don't get bjs from them. Do feel free to explore with human beings you actually find attractive. It'll make sexual exploration way more enjoyable than just getting off.


I do want to get off , too much where it got me to the point where i don't do simple life tasks and important one's because i want to masturbate/watch porn or meet people for sex.
I always treat everybody with respect regardless if i am attracted to them or not , although im pretty rough lol.
Thanks for replying.
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Re: Bisexual? Pansexual?

Unread postby Iamjava » 2 June 2019, 20:51

you, my fair sir, are an addict. you need help before you end up with every std out there. i understand hypersexuality (re: bipolar disorder) pretty well, but even in that mode i dont bang anything that moves..

seriously, slow down before you burn.

one other thing: you dont have a sexuality, you just have sex. if sex is overcoming your life then it has gone from mere pleasure to an addiction.
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Re: Bisexual? Pansexual?

Unread postby Eryx » 3 June 2019, 03:35

My 10 cents are that you should prioritize knowing about why you love sex so much before you focus on where in the sexuality spectrum you fall under. Figuring out your sexuality is the simpler part, it won't change things that much. Figuring out if your sexual activity is healthy, and leading to the future you aspire, is more urgent. Talk to someone who can really help you.
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Re: Bisexual? Pansexual?

Unread postby FirstBorn93 » 6 June 2019, 01:41

Eryx wrote:My 10 cents are that you should prioritize knowing about why you love sex so much before you focus on where in the sexuality spectrum you fall under. Figuring out your sexuality is the simpler part, it won't change things that much. Figuring out if your sexual activity is healthy, and leading to the future you aspire, is more urgent. Talk to someone who can really help you.


Thank you.

Iamjava wrote:you, my fair sir, are an addict. you need help before you end up with every std out there. i understand hypersexuality (re: bipolar disorder) pretty well, but even in that mode i dont bang anything that moves..

seriously, slow down before you burn.

one other thing: you dont have a sexuality, you just have sex. if sex is overcoming your life then it has gone from mere pleasure to an addiction.


Exactly.
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Re: Bisexual? Pansexual?

Unread postby Iamjava » 6 June 2019, 03:10

well thats step 1..
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Re: Bisexual? Pansexual?

Unread postby shyseed » 16 June 2019, 17:59

by defination bisexual i swing both ways
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