bottom of the relationship

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bottom of the relationship

Unread postby bilbo98 » 15 March 2019, 17:00

Hello everyone
I need some advice, I don't know what to do with my relationship. I've been with a guy for 2 years and I've really been very pleased with him until a few months ago when I started to get frustrated. When we met I was passive (almost all my previous experiences had been passive, although I had some active that I liked).
When I started with this guy I was always passive and he was always active, I didn't care, I thought that if we were serious he would agree to be passive from time to time. I told him and he told me that I would be passive later, that I was not prepared. I didn't care.

However, in the last few months he has been frustrating me and we have had conversations about it. He told me that once I tried and that he didn't like me, that he couldn't do anything about it, right after, I went for a few months to study abroad for a few months in the hope that when I got back I would have changed my mind.
The thing is that nothing changes, I got frustrated and decided that if he didn't make the effort to try to be passive with me (we've been together for 2 years, he's never had a boyfriend before, I don't know who I would try but of course he wasn't as trustworthy as me) I wouldn't make the effort either. I have to wipe my anus, wax my ass etc. And so we have been 2 months, having sex but without anal penetration, until the situation became somewhat tense and we had a conversation. He told me that he can not give me what I ask, that I can not ask him to be passive because he does not like, literally told me that asking him to do passive is like asking a straight guy to kiss another guy. I told him that okay, we'll see what we do. And since then the situation is no longer tense as before.

However, I'm spinning my head again and I'm getting frustrated again. The truth is that I don't know if being active is something I'm going to like (I haven't been active for more than 2 years and the experience I have in it is minimal). If I continue with it, I resign myself not to try something that I want to try and that frustrates me if I leave it with him, I risk losing someone I love, for something that I really do not know if I like it and that frightens me. Right now, I don't see myself in a future with him, I don't know if it's because I give them a lot of thought or what.

In the relationships of 2 guys it is normal that there are 100% marked roles? I'm avorthinking something that doesn't really matter that much?

Sorry if my english is not correct.

Thank you in advance for your answers.
bilbo98
 
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Re: bottom of the relationship

Unread postby Eryx » 15 March 2019, 21:43

In my relationship I'm always the bottom and he's always the top. I like being the top sometimes too, but I don't mind that he doesn't like it. He was upfront about not enjoying it since the beginning and I respect that. If I ever feel like I need to fuck someone, I'll just buy a fleshjack or tell him about it so we can figure out a solution together (i.e. sharing our bed with another bottom).

So yeah, those are my two suggestions. Why does it matter so much anyway? Is it a necessity in your life to be fucking someone right now? I suspect you're letting your mind wander to obsessions that aren't even relevant.
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Eryx
 
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