Can gays themselves be homophobes ?

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Can gays themselves be homophobes ?

Unread postby naskurnarah » 1 February 2019, 07:47

Do you think gay guys can themselves turn out to be homophobes ? I know of a person, who I am sure, is interested in gay sex. Don't know if he is gay or bi, but I am sure he is interested in other men. He is also a homophobe. How can that be ? What do you think about it ? Do you know any such guys ?
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Re: Can gays themselves be homophobes ?

Unread postby Stardust » 1 February 2019, 08:45

Anything can happen in the weird minds of people.
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Re: Can gays themselves be homophobes ?

Unread postby DannyBoy99 » 1 February 2019, 09:28

See i would say that its more due to the nature of gay people / how they act? [its hard to describe] But obviously you get your straight acting gay people, and then the more camp ones.

So i guess it could come down to that and whether camp people bother you ? [as they make up a large part of the gay community]
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Re: Can gays themselves be homophobes ?

Unread postby rogonandi » 1 February 2019, 09:46

Of course they can be homophobic and gay at the same time. There are plenty of gay people who bear the attitude of their community, and any toxic influences that come with it. There are also those who use self hatred as a way to cope with lack of romantic success.

In either case, it’s self-destructive and needs to be dealt with if these people are ever going to be content.
People love to follow fools; they don't feel so alone then.

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Re: Can gays themselves be homophobes ?

Unread postby PopTart » 1 February 2019, 10:30

I think some homophobes, are the result of internalized homophobia, yeah. As Nandi says, it can be a powerful motivator, shame, the social expectation of ones peers. Some people can't accept it, internalize it, hate themselves for it and hate those who exhibit what they hate and hate them all the more for being able to accept, what they themselves, cannot.

It's sad, it's something they need to deal with to find peace and acceptance of themselves.

The rest, I'm with Stardust, who can say for certain what qualifies for justified motivation in their minds.
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Re: Can gays themselves be homophobes ?

Unread postby Eryx » 1 February 2019, 12:15

Grindr is a perfect place to find heaps of gay homophobes. I feel sorry for them.
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Re: Can gays themselves be homophobes ?

Unread postby poolerboy0077 » 1 February 2019, 13:27

Sure. It’s a free country.
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Re: Can gays themselves be homophobes ?

Unread postby Brenden » 1 February 2019, 14:08

A significant number of well-known homophobes (politicians, preachers, etc) have turned out to be gay.

There is in fact a whole website devoted to these people: https://gayhomophobe.com
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Re: Can gays themselves be homophobes ?

Unread postby bubbling_over » 1 February 2019, 15:29

Brenden wrote:A significant number of well-known homophobes (politicians, preachers, etc) have turned out to be gay.

There is in fact a whole website devoted to these people: https://gayhomophobe.com


I'm shocked that gay conversion therapy seems to be legal still...
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Re: Can gays themselves be homophobes ?

Unread postby Stardust » 1 February 2019, 17:49

To be honest I think a lot of homophobes have repressed desires, like other people in this thread have probably said :(

So they focus their internal anger outwards and hey presto, a homophobe is born.
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Re: Can gays themselves be homophobes ?

Unread postby poolerboy0077 » 1 February 2019, 19:02

Brenden wrote:A significant number of well-known homophobes (politicians, preachers, etc) have turned out to be gay.

There is in fact a whole website devoted to these people: https://gayhomophobe.com

I’ve always been kind of annoyed at the coverage this gets, though. It’s almost a stereotype at this point to assume that all over-the-top homophobes must necessarily be repressed or closeted gays themselves. It has the effect of giving heterosexuals the impression that they bear no responsibility for homophobia, giving them a kind of free pass.
Blow: "Nowadays even Liam can release an album of his screechy vocals and it'll probably go #1..."
Ramzus: I can admit that I'm horny just about 24/7
homomorphism: I used to not think your name was deshay and that Erick was just being racist
Hunter: sometimes I think I was literally born to be a pornstar
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Re: Can gays themselves be homophobes ?

Unread postby Eryx » 2 February 2019, 13:28

The stereotype exists because it happens often. As tends to be the case with stereotypes! :P
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Re: Can gays themselves be homophobes ?

Unread postby poolerboy0077 » 2 February 2019, 17:21

Eryx wrote:The stereotype exists because it happens often. As tends to be the case with stereotypes! :P

My issue wasn’t that it doesn’t happen at all. Of course it happens—that’s why you can repost instances of it. My issue is with the people who spread them to insinuate that this is some kind of trend or that there is a pervasiveness.
Blow: "Nowadays even Liam can release an album of his screechy vocals and it'll probably go #1..."
Ramzus: I can admit that I'm horny just about 24/7
homomorphism: I used to not think your name was deshay and that Erick was just being racist
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Re: Can gays themselves be homophobes ?

Unread postby Dextroque » 2 February 2019, 20:34

Oh please.... :blargh:

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Re: Can gays themselves be homophobes ?

Unread postby Eryx » 4 February 2019, 02:24

True, Pooler, but it's nonsensical to keep complaining about it. It's going to happen again and again.
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Re: Can gays themselves be homophobes ?

Unread postby Yeauxleaux » 4 February 2019, 04:20

I find the term "homophobia" extremely rinsed.

I guess, if it's like a very deeply closeted gay person who actively supports legislation against LGBT people or who bashes gay people constantly.

I don't think it's necessarily "homophobia" or "internalised homophobia!" to simply have a difference of opinion on some things though. It gets tiring hearing very openly gay men get accused of that, just because they might prefer to date masculine men (or fit men), or if they're not really be into "the scene", or if they think Pride is a bit too raunchy for something that happens in broad daylight in public. Literally none of that equates to hating gay people or gay sex.

Also yeah I think the whole "homophobes are always gay" meme is a bit of an oversimplification, although there's definitely some truth to it. Some of these extremely anti-gay people really are just straight conservatives who believe all manner of things about gay people. I also think sometimes it's not that these men are gay necessarily, it's just that they're not very comfortable in their masculinity even as straight men.
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Re: Can gays themselves be homophobes ?

Unread postby iBttm » 19 February 2019, 15:41

I might be considered "homophobic" for not agreeing with what the "gay community" does. Just because I suck dick and am really comfortable with how I am sexually with men doesn't mean I'm tied to any community like LGBT. The ones I will help or talk to about things are other younger effeminate bottoms. The same was done for me a long time ago (and no it wasn't the "gay community").

I also really don't care about politics or who has homophobic feelings. I've had really amazing sexual interactions with men for the longest time now, and boys when I was young-er, that the only opinion about me that matters is the guy(s) I sleep with. Or at least it was this way until everything same-sex encounters automatically had to be considered gay. It also made self-identification way too complicated and depressing because its really not that easy for a lot of guys to tell it on the mountain!

Besides, if anybody says homophobic things they're typically directing them at one or two people like that one drag queen who taught 5th grade boys how to wear makeup and be pretty then teach them the new meaning of 'gender.' Not all gay people agree with that, so they're excluded from the homophobic attacks! They're also not talking about me because even though I'm really sexual, I'm not in everybody's face about what I do with men. Not everybody will be so excited to hear details and that's fine.
This is why I soo miss the m4mNSA scene.
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