Falling in love with an escort

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Falling in love with an escort

Unread postby johnnybic » 24 October 2017, 13:50

I am 64 and should know better, but the heart goes where it wants. I recently spent more than a week with an escort--not only is he great looking and "into older guys," but he is so incredibly NICE. I know there is no future--he lives a continent away and he's in a relationship--but I cannot stop fantasizing about him. Ten years ago my last relationship ended badly--in the end it was loveless, passionless, and quite destructive. I know I have been in a "self-protection" mode since the break-up, but this guy pushed every button. I think I enjoyed being desired, having attention paid to me, and being genuinely happy for 8 days. I haven't smiled that much in years. In a sense, now I am grieving. How can I handle this? Anyone been there? I keep thinking, "No fool like an old fool."
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Re: Falling in love with an escort

Unread postby Yeauxleaux » 24 October 2017, 15:54

Wha...

Just accept that he was acting (no shade, it's just what escorts are paid to do) and stop talking to him until you forget...
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Re: Falling in love with an escort

Unread postby Derek » 24 October 2017, 16:20

Yeauxleaux wrote:no shade

Did you see where he said that he's 64?

I recommend hiring a different escort so you can find true love with someone who lives closer by.
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Re: Falling in love with an escort

Unread postby Marmaduke » 24 October 2017, 19:02

Not to cast aspersion on your sex life, but do you think perhaps an absence of other suitors for an extended period may have led you to particularly enjoy the attention given to you by someone apparently out of your league (I don't mean that to sound quite so cunty as it does, but were he in your league you wouldn't need to be paying him)?

I mean, your apparent profound enjoyment of this arrangement means you're probably going to do it again. I suppose all I can do it caution that this sort of misplaced and unchecked attachment is what gets people taken advantage of. Perhaps take a more cautious and cynical approach with your next prostitute, at least until the end of the second week? I'd hate to see you give thousands of pounds to a Ukrainian twink with a tale of wanting to free his Grandmother from her Crimean oppression under Putin's boot heel. He'll only spend the money on Yeezy Boosts and rent and his Grandmother's travel arrangements will only get more expensive and drawn out.
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Re: Falling in love with an escort

Unread postby johnnybic » 24 October 2017, 21:30

You are, of course, correct. And I know he was paid to do this. Perhaps, I've just had really bad escorts prior to this? It's not cunty--it's real. I have always been cynical with my previous encounters with prostitutes. I don't know why this one was different. Thanks for taking the time to respond, though. Fortunately, there were no appeals for extra money or to save a grandmother from Crimean oppression. Yet.
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Re: Falling in love with an escort

Unread postby Jzone » 24 October 2017, 22:06

@johnnybic
It's entirely possible that you found a fantastic escort who is a really cool, caring guy. (Not speaking from personal experience, but I assume they exist.) Who wouldn't fall in love after a 10-year dry spell? Just be real about the situation. If you can't buy him away from his partner (and I don't suggest you try) then be happy for those 8 days and move on. At least you will always have Paris, or where ever it was.
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Re: Falling in love with an escort

Unread postby johnnybic » 25 October 2017, 04:46

LOL. It was Palm Springs, but it might as well have been Paris. Thanks for the feedback. And, no, I can't buy him away (unless I win the PowerBall in the next few days). I can barely pay my medical bills!! I also just realized this forum is for "younger gay men" so now I really feel like a dizzy old queen. Ah, well. I will write my autobiography and this will make a darkly funny chapter!
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Re: Falling in love with an escort

Unread postby Jzone » 25 October 2017, 05:17

I also just realized this forum is for "younger gay men" so now I really feel like a dizzy old queen. Ah, well. I will write my autobiography and this will make a darkly funny chapter!

Where did you get that impression?!

This is all that the posted rules have to say regarding a user's age:
Eligibility

This forum is meant for persons age 18 and older. Users who lie about their age during account registration in order to bypass this requirement will be banned.

What would these youngsters do without our wisdom and sage advice???
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Re: Falling in love with an escort

Unread postby Subra » 25 October 2017, 18:15

I can empathize. Infatuation like this after a long drought is bound to make anyone giddy. As people grow older they also grow lonelier and your escort probably provided you with the company you thought no longer possible.

Unfortunately it is a profession, and the good ones know how to make you feel this way. It's an art really, but it leads to confusion about true feelings since they hide them so well and you wear yours on your sleeve. I'm sure he's as wonderful as you say, but he also has bills. Maybe try seeking companionship with someone you don't have to pay. There are many young-ish guys who are into older.
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Re: Falling in love with an escort

Unread postby johnnybic » 26 October 2017, 01:06

You are correct. I am feeling like a junior high school student again with a crush on my science teacher (Mr. Thornton). And I think I got my answer: he is in town and evidently doesn't want or need my business. Sometimes life just sucks. Thanks for taking the time to respond.
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Re: Falling in love with an escort

Unread postby acpro » 26 October 2017, 08:13

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Re: Falling in love with an escort

Unread postby poolerboy0077 » 26 October 2017, 20:30

acpro wrote:


Damn it you beat me to it! :lol:
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Re: Falling in love with an escort

Unread postby Grovern » 27 December 2020, 19:08

Wow, I really feel sorry for you. I've never had a similar situation, but I'm sure it's terrible. All that connects me to the escort is that I once ordered party girls for my friend's party. I haven't had a relationship in a long time, because I can't keep it together. Perhaps this is due to the fact that I can not love anyone. YES, you can say that it's very easy to love someone, but because I've been holding back my feelings for decades, now I've just forgotten what it's like to love someone. Perhaps this is my plus, since I will never suffer because of the breakup of a relationship, but do not forget that I will never be able to understand the feelings that couples in love experience :(
Last edited by Grovern on 5 January 2021, 12:52, edited 1 time in total.
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Re: Falling in love with an escort

Unread postby NobodySpecial » 28 December 2020, 15:52

My sexuality was definitely influenced by a somewhat older man who was seeking to have a "kept" young man. Note, I was never escort material. While I felt I was good in bed, I wasn't blessed with a stallion's cock nor a blemish-less body. Even if I had the ideal body, I don't think I could have gone that route as I would have felt owned, and I never wanted to be in a "sugar daddy" arrangement I I don't like feeling indebted to someone else.

Nevertheless, at one point in my early years centuries ago, I realized just how angry and bitter I was that I could never have the body of someone who could make their living that way. In a restroom in a campus building where I had many classes, a man started putting on the walls that he was looking to pay the way for a young, handsome college man in exchange for weekend visits for sex. I found myself covering up those messages not out of moral indignation of the arrangement, but because I saw it as something for a guy who was a league or two above my lot in life... I was simply being a jealous asshole.

Long story short, I finally met that guy in the restroom, and he invited me to his hotel. It was more about curiosity than anything else. Note, the guy was probably 10 years or so older than me. Note also that he was not a very attractive man by any definition.

We did a lot of talking that night, and my heart went out to him. He had his heart broken several years earlier. He had a younger man who he loved dearly. One day his partner said someone died in his family and he needed to go out to California to deal with it and that he would need some money. Well this faithful partner gave him the money he requested and looked forwarded to his return. Well the young man disappeared. So the man hired a detective to find out what happened as he was concerned about fowl play. Long and short, the young man had left him, and took money that he felt he was entitled to for having "acted" the role of his partner. The young asshole didn't even have the decency to tell his partner that he wanted out. He just pulled this scam on his partner...

Anyway, the man decided he was never going to let himself be that vulnerable again. So he started "paying" for sex. He figured if he was going to spend his money to have a "kept" young man, he might as well set a high standard for the physical attributes he wanted in that young man.

When I heard his story, I realized that it wasn't about my inability to measure up to those standards that was in question, but rather how some gay men can be so ugly that they would use other gay men to the point of breaking their heart.

That night was just a one night thing with this man, but it was very pivotal for me. Though I had been having sex with men for about two years by then, not one of them had ever let me top. I had a lot of doubts at to whether I was really gay when up to that point m2m sex was so pathetic. Nevertheless, this heart broken, unattractive John Doe woke me up to the real joys of m2m sex.

I only hope that one day he found someone who genuinely cared for him -- and not just his money. As for me, I realized that there are a lot of reasons that some men pay for gay sex. It is not all about kinky sex, power plays, and money. Some like this guy have big hearts, and cannot deal with another broken heart.

Johnnybic, I don't think you are an old fool for desiring an escort who was kind to you. The greatest gift gay/bi desire really isn't the sex -- no matter how extremely HOT it can be. Rather it is the desire to love and be loved by another man. Plenty of us get hurt really bad when we try. I've had my own examples of that. All I can say is I hope one day you are up to trying again. I don't see the escort (no matter how kind he seemed) will give you want you want. I've been blessed to have been with my partner for 17+ years now. I now fail at the sex part because I have a huge problem with ED, yet he still stays. His commitment only makes my heart beat that much stronger for him. To me he is my angel on earth. I hope you find someone truly interested in you one day.
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Re: Falling in love with an escort

Unread postby Fishzhil » 13 February 2021, 11:33

That sounds painful for me when someone cannot afford himself to be near his beloved, it is really sad, but this is love and we can't control someones fate. I also had a similar situation with an escort, a really nice guy that was always happy and it was fun to be with him, I spent a lot of time and money with hope to make him love me. But he said he is too young to be with me and it is not possible to be like that and I agree with him. I appreciate that he was correct and he didn't spent time with me for my money. My friends told me I am stupid because I believed in a relation with an escort, but I know that even an escort deserves a couple. Now I found a partner on https://www.charlotte-stripper.com/bach ... rip-clubs/ and I believe it will be alright, because all of them are really cool there.
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