Gay men - if you could, would you be a woman instead?

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Re: Gay men - if you could, would you be a woman instead?

Unread postby jonbennxo » 26 November 2019, 20:52

Brasileiro wrote:I am not even reading your posts completely. It is wearing me out and I made my point days ago.

Thanks for contributing and thanks for your advice as well! I appreciate it! Just to add - we're just debating; I know you've made your point days ago -and I am by no means disputing it, nor am I arguing with it; nor am I trying to get you to change your opinion. It's just a debate; that's all. Thanks again!

René wrote:(as summarised here, here, here and here)

Thanks! I'll definitely have a read. Just to clarify - I am not saying that "those" kids are the "real" trans people. I was just using that example to illustrate my point of coming out as trans - as being a process/journey. Someone who still isn't sure of their gender or is still questioning etc, might say "I want to be a woman" as opposed to saying "I am a woman" - and that's perfectly fine. It doesn't mean they're not trans. That's the point I was trying to make.

GearFetTwinkRomance wrote:Could someone explain the part of "treat one like a woman" vs. "treat them like a man", since I don't follow, what is meant by this.

I'm 99% sure I don't need to explain this as I'm sure you yourself grew up in a hetero-normative society or have seen at least one film where a heterosexual relationship is portrayed. Yes, of course you are correct - gay men can treat each other as two manly men in a relationship, that is 100% fine and normal and valid. They can have scruff snuggles, have dick fights, "wrestle for pole position" and whatnot and that's good for them!

However, no 2 gay men are the same. If I prefer a different dynamic in my relationships, then that is perfectly fine and normal and valid as well. The fact that there are many ignorant people out there who ask questions such as "who's the woman in this relationship?", is sad, but it's nothing to do with me. If I prefer to walk around my house in a tight dress and high heels, and my (bisexual) macho boyfriend treats me exactly the same way he used to treat his ex-girlfriends, then that's my business. Some may call it a "fetish" but to me, that's my reality and that's how my brain is wired and that's what makes me 100% happy (and my partner).

kenzie_matt wrote:Total bottoms can receive blowjobs and really like them (in my experience). A total bottom is merely somebody who doesn't top - in other words, does not put his penis up another guy's ass. Clarity is best here.

I've already addressed this previously - but like I said I just (wrongly) assumed that "total bottom" was the correct term to use everywhere for the definition I had provided. Maybe it's just in my area, maybe just my group of people; I don't know.

My logic was: you said: "somebody who doesn't top - in other words, does not put his penis up another guy's ass" - ok but isn't that just a "bottom"? Why add the "total"? To me, (I thought) someone who always bottoms, and only bottoms, is a bottom. Someone who mostly bottoms, but sometimes they top or they CAN top; is a "versatile bottom". A total bottom = someone who doesn't like to receive blowjobs, made perfect sense to me. How else would you simply call someone who doesn't stick their cock into an ass or into another person's mouth? Like I said, it made sense to me, and good old Urban Dictionary backed me up on this as much as I am now aware that this isn't the correct term that people use worldwide. :shrug:
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Re: Gay men - if you could, would you be a woman instead?

Unread postby René » 1 December 2019, 09:13

I love being a guy. I love having a penis, being able to gain muscle relatively easily, facial/body hair, being able to use urinals and otherwise not having to sit down on a potentially unhygienic surface to pee in public restrooms, not having any of the hormonal issues women get, etc...

So no way, absolutely not. (And for the record, the term "total bottom" is fully applicable to me.)
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Re: Gay men - if you could, would you be a woman instead?

Unread postby kenzie_matt » 4 December 2019, 07:36

The bathroom! If nothing else, the advantages of having access to a urinal is a major plus.
And of course, madly in love with my penis too.
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Re: Gay men - if you could, would you be a woman instead?

Unread postby NobodySpecial » 4 December 2019, 16:49

kenzie_matt wrote:The bathroom! If nothing else, the advantages of having access to a urinal is a major plus.
And of course, madly in love with my penis too.


I was never madly in love with my penis. In fact, it was the opposite for me, I only felt happy frequently hiding it inside a hot man's ass. If only I could have permanently kept it inside another guy's ass, I would have been happier. ;)
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Re: Gay men - if you could, would you be a woman instead?

Unread postby mxguy01 » 4 December 2019, 22:33

René wrote:I love being a guy. I love having a penis, being able to gain muscle relatively easily, facial/body hair, being able to use urinals and otherwise not having to sit down on a potentially unhygienic surface to pee in public restrooms, not having any of the hormonal issues women get, etc...

So no way, absolutely not. (And for the record, the term "total bottom" is fully applicable to me.)


Currently I'm wondering what the hell I identify as bottom, top, horribly verse, just depends upon the moment lately. More on topic. I love my penis no matter where I'm at with the prior and would never be without it! Oh, even better when the my other has one that we can sword fight with. Jeez, no penis, I'd become Catholic again too... Not!
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Re: Gay men - if you could, would you be a woman instead?

Unread postby poolerboy0077 » 4 December 2019, 23:04

René wrote:I love being a guy. I love having a penis, being able to gain muscle relatively easily, facial/body hair, being able to use urinals and otherwise not having to sit down on a potentially unhygienic surface to pee in public restrooms, not having any of the hormonal issues women get, etc...

So no way, absolutely not. (And for the record, the term "total bottom" is fully applicable to me.)

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Re: Gay men - if you could, would you be a woman instead?

Unread postby GearFetTwinkRomance » 5 December 2019, 14:02

jonbennxo wrote:I'm 99% sure I don't need to explain this as I'm sure you yourself grew up in a hetero-normative society or have seen at least one film where a heterosexual relationship is portrayed. Yes, of course you are correct - gay men can treat each other as two manly men in a relationship, that is 100% fine and normal and valid. They can have scruff snuggles, have dick fights, "wrestle for pole position" and whatnot and that's good for them!


Sure I grew up in a common heterosexual society and all the relationships I've ever known of until I was going away at age 17 would be them of heterosexuals.
Yet also I don't see much of a difference in men treating women or women treating men, or for that case, have not seen any man treating a man like a woman, nor a woman treating a woman like a man or things like that. It seems all the same to me, in the same facets of life. To treat one another with some decent respect.

jonbennxo wrote:However, no 2 gay men are the same. If I prefer a different dynamic in my relationships, then that is perfectly fine and normal and valid as well. The fact that there are many ignorant people out there who ask questions such as "who's the woman in this relationship?", is sad, but it's nothing to do with me. If I prefer to walk around my house in a tight dress and high heels, and my (bisexual) macho boyfriend treats me exactly the same way he used to treat his ex-girlfriends, then that's my business. Some may call it a "fetish" but to me, that's my reality and that's how my brain is wired and that's what makes me 100% happy (and my partner).


Okay, thanks for the insight. I thought it was just the same, treating people like people, as equal in their standing, eye level or what they call it.

Fetish would be a variety of cross dressing, I guess. There's people who are trans-indentity by nature, too. Nothing wrong with that, everyone's an individual. As long as everyone's happy with their ways of living life, nothing wrong with that.
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