How to practice safe sex.

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How to practice safe sex.

Unread postby Bourdain » 21 December 2012, 10:08

Hello, seeing as most people are under 18 in this forum, you might not know where to get cheap or free condoms, this might be a good start, if you have started being sexually active it's best to keep yourself protected from the dangers. If you haven't started being sexually active it's best if you know what's coming and how to get yourself ready while staying protected.

First of all, why have safe sex?
You're probably asking yourself, "Oh why do I even want to have safe sex? Bareback is so much better and I don't have to worry about getting my partner pregnant, so why even bother?"

Having unprotected sex is a serious health hazard, it's possible to transmit sexually transmitted diseases. For example HIV, Gonorrhea, Chlamydia, Herpes, Syphilis, HPV, etc etc. It is very important to use protection. Having sex even with your partner should be done with protection. HIV and other STIs can take several months to show up on tests, during that period you will show up as negative but still be able to transmit diseases. It is very very important to keep yourself protected, you never ever know if the guy you're having sex with has diseases or not, it sometimes doesn't show up until very late, so it's best to get yourself tested regularly: http://goo.gl/maps/vZ9JH

Brenden wrote:For HIV transmission, the risk for bottoming is 50 per 10,000 exposures (1 in 200), while the risk for topping is 6.5 per 10,000 exposures (1 in 1,500). That means the risk of transmission is 7.7 times greater for the bottom. [source]


I will mainly focus on condoms.

It is possible to get condoms for REALLY cheap in the US and UK in large bulks. These condoms follow safety standards and can be used as regular store bought condoms. You can get (or used to be) free condoms in your local plan parenthood section of a clinic, if you feel comfortable, go ahead.

Please get condoms that fit your size, if they're too big they may slip out during intercourse, if they're too small they may rip. Do NOT use condoms that have gone past their shelf date, aka expiration date. The latex may be very weakened and it may break during intercourse, there are some types of lube you should and should not use. For example, it's best if you use a lot water-based lubricant as it won't degrade the condom as fast and tens to be much safer.

The three main types of lube are:

Water-Based
  • rinses off easily from skin and fabric
  • cheaper and easier to find than silicone-based lube
Silicone-Based
  • lasts longer than water-based lube
  • best for anal sex
Flavored
  • usually a water-based lube with flavor added, often contains sugar
  • best for oral sex, especially when using a condom

DO: use lube for anal sex.... every time!
Lube is a must for anal sex. Since the anus is not self-lubricating, anal sex without lube is painful and risky. Friction during anal sex can cause tears to the tissue, increasing risk of STIs, including HIV. To reduce tearing and increase pleasure, apply lube (and a condom) before penetration, and reapply as needed.

DON'T: use an oil-based product as lube during sex.
Oil-based products rapidly degrade latex condoms, putting you at risk for STIs and unplanned pregnancy. Oil-based products include Vaseline, baby oil, olive oil, chocolate syrup, whipped cream, and hand or body lotion. As a rule of thumb, do not use any cooking or beauty products as lube; only use products specifically designed for sex.

DO: use silicone-based lube during anal sex.
Because the anus and rectum absorb water, silicone-based lube lasts longer than water-based lube. If the only lube available to you is water-based lube, use it and reapply often.

STIs aren't the only issue regarding unsafe sex; unprotected anal sex can lead to urinary tract infections due to the residual faecal matter. There are also recent links between unprotected oral and anal sex leading to an increased risk of developing mouth and anal cancers.

Condoms in the UK

In the UK, anyone can get free condoms from a Contraceptive and Sexual Health (CASH) (formerly known as Family Planning) or Genito-Urinary Medicine (GUM) clinics. They would have to see a Health Care Assistant (HCA) or specialist nurse, but would otherwise be given free condoms.

Anyone between 14 and 24 can also sign-up for something called a C-Card (Condom Card), which allows them to simply pick up a packet of 3, 6, or 12 condoms each week from any place displaying the C-Card logo (namely CASH/GUM clinics). The amount you can get depends on your age and whether you're sexually active. They offer a choice of condoms; regular, flavoured, ribbed/dotted, large, snug, feather, sensitive (doesn't have spermicide), and latex-free. Lubricant can also be requested (it's not usually offered by the health care professional due to higher costs), but it's anyone's guess what you'll get.

Joe wrote:Sexual Health in Bristol

REMEMBER THAT SEXUAL HEALTH SERVICES ARE COMPLETELY CONFIDENTIAL UNLESS THE STAFF BELIEVE YOU TO BE AT RISK, IN WHICH CASE THEY MAY HAVE TO TELL SOMEONE ABOVE THEM, BUT THIS WILL BE DISCUSSED WITH YOU AND WILL NOT BE SHARED WITH ANYONE WHO DOES NOT ABSOLUTELY HAVE TO KNOW.

In Bristol, sexual health services for young people are managed by a branch of the NHS called 4YP, which stand for 'For Young People'. 4YP have a distinctive logo:

Image

This is displayed in pharmacies, doctor's surgeries, the GUM clinic in the City Centre, some youth clubs and some colleges. Anywhere you see this you can pick up a chlamydia test (a shiny blue packet for males and a shiny pink one for females) and a packet of condoms. This packet normally contains eight condoms and two sachets of lube. There are normally a mix which equates to roughly 4 standard, two flavoured, a ribbed or dotted one and an extra safe. Lube-wise, there are normally two packets of plain lube.

You can go into any 4YP Doctor's Practice and ask for a drop in. They will normally see you within 15 minutes, and your consultation normally lasts 15 minutes, but can be as long as it needs to be.

You can talk to them about anything, as long as it's sex or relationships related. You can register for a C-Card, which is a condom card, as explained by Reitou Sakura above. Differently though, you can use it as many times as you need to in one period. There are ten empty squares, which get filled in as you use it. When asking for a C-Card, you are given something called 'the condom teach', in which they show you how to properly use a condom, explain sexual health to you and try to dispel any obvious myths. The condom teach is simple and easy to understand so ensure you ask away!

There's a link to the website below.

http://www.4ypbristol.co.uk/

Just remember, the key to good sexual wellbeing rests with you.


Condom links
They will come in discrete packages and will NOT have any condom or sex related work on the package, it will not also show up in your credit card history any condom related word, but instead as a company.

America:
http://www.condomusa.com/4dollar.asp (For the 100 condom order)

United Kingdom:
http://www.freedoms-shop.nhs.uk/ (Check the Mates condoms).

Brazil:
Eryx wrote:http://www.buscape.com.br/preservativo.html
http://www.sitedacompra.com.br/departam ... vo-Blowtex

Free condoms are offered in clubs, concerts, public squares, schools and malls... I have over 50 condoms to spend with my boyfriend... We paid for two. :P


Worldwide:
Adam & Eve sex shop, they offer condoms for a real cheap price. At checkout type in the code DV to get 50% off anything with free shipping, so condoms get super cheap.

PS: PM me where you can get free condoms or cheap condoms so I can add the information here.



----------Health Clinics----------
http://goo.gl/maps/RgPd9


It's very affordable and it will last you a long time, it's a really small price for such a large order.

How to put on a condom.
Image

For more information on HIV and other STIs, check this thread!

mattyengland wrote:Good morning boys and girls. I've noticed around the forum that an alarmingly high number of you have got various facts twisted and wrong over HIV, particularly amongst our younger members. Seeing as some of you have in all likelihood had insufficient sex ed, here is a sex ed class for you. Having had a friend who had a near miss with HIV and his research into it, I'm going to just give you all what the SCIENTIFIC viewpoint is on HIV at the moment. Obviously there is a large amount of fear and controversy surrounding HIV, but the more you know about it, the better you'll be able to avoid it.

Why are you telling us this?
HIV is on the rise worldwide. In the western world, a large proportion of new cases are in gay men. The National Health Service in the UK reckons that 1 in 8 gay men in Brighton are HIV positive, and 1 in 10 in London. These are shockingly high percentages, although the NHS does work on that only 3% of the population are Men who have sex with Men. The Centres for Disease Control in the USA reckon that up to 20% of gay men in San Francisco are HIV positive, they have had even higher estimates in the past as well.
These are sobering statistics so pay attention.

How do you catch HIV?
HIV is transmitted primarily by:
- Unprotected Anal sex
- Unprotected Vaginal sex
- sharing needles EDIT (prompted by Geometrix)
I'd also stress being extremely careful with needle use!
I'm not sure about the rest of the world, but right now in Toronto, Canada there's been a spike in people between ages 14 - 25 using needles for drug use, and unfortunately sharing.

EDIT (prompted by Davey): - Blood and sexual fluids through open wounds, this is mainly relevant to medical professionals and is one of the reasons that gloves must be worn by medical staff.

Can I catch HIV from unprotected oral?
This is a subject of huge scientific debate. There have been many studies done over the years. There are two types of data: the behaviour reported by patients and data collected from a study. Patient sourced data is notoriously unreliable. This is because people either lie, can't remember (alcohol and drugs) or are in denial. The CDC in the USA did a study using patient sourced data and concluded that 8% of new infections were due to unprotected oral. This study has been largely discounted because it is believed to be wildly inaccurate and is now getting quite old. Since then, there have been several studies involving scientists monitoring serodiscordant couples (where one is positive, and one is negative). Condoms were used for anal and vaginal sex, but not for oral sex. One of these ran for over 10 years and included 19,000 acts of oral sex. There was not a single transmission in any of the studies.
So, in short, we believe that there is no risk from being sucked, and only a theoretical risk from sucking someone. It is good practice though not to allow ejaculation in the mouth. This is not to say it's impossible to catch HIV from Oral Sex, but it is highly improbable. However, whilst you are unlikely to catch HIV from oral sex, you can catch most other STDs very easily from oral sex, so protection should always be considered, even with oral sex.

Why is it harder to catch HIV from Oral sex?
Your mouth is like a fortress to HIV, it's designed to keep out bugs in the first place. Your saliva is also very good at destroying HIV, since it contains enzymes that damage HIV, making it unable to reproduce. There are also very few of the cells that HIV can infect in the mouth, since HIV needs certain select cells.

How can I protect myself?
Use condoms, it's pretty obvious really. Condoms prevent transmission of HIV effectively. Make sure you use plenty of lube for anal sex, and don't double bag condoms, this will only cause friction making them more likely to break. Also, everyone should get tested once a year, regardless of having protected sex or not. Those who have unprotected sex should test more regularly.

Can I catch HIV from a surface/kissing/etc?

No. HIV is very vulnerable to changes in temperature and PH. Essentially, once it's left the body, it will not be able to reproduce because it will have been damaged. Only body to body will generally allow transfer. HIV is actually quite hard to catch.

Help! I had unprotected sex with someone who is known to be positive/I've been raped/any other scenario.
The following MUST be done within 72 hours of the event, and preferably ASAP. Go to the emergency department at your hospital IMMEDIATELY. They might give you a medication called PEP which if taken properly will reduce your chance of becoming positive. PEP is essentially HIV medication, and will probably make you suffer some pretty horrendous side effects like vomiting etc, but it will be worth it. PEP is not suitable for all cases, so it's up to the duty doctor to decide. In countries with a health system (UK, Canada, most of Europe) it will be free.

So what are the stages of HIV infection, and what's AIDS?
There are two stages of HIV infection:
- initial infection/Seroconversion
- Late stage/AIDS
Seroconversion will occur approximately 4-6 weeks after the infection, with the average time to seroconversion being only 22 days. Symptoms may or may not occur, but when they do occur they are very similar to mono/glandular fever. They include: flu, fever, rash, sore throat and swollen lymph nodes. There are many symptoms for HIV, which may or may not occur, and the presence of these symptoms does not mean much since they occur in many many other conditions.
AIDS is when your immune system has collapsed. Your T cells number under 200. This leaves you open to many opportunistic infections, like pneumonia.

So when can I test?
Testing at 6 weeks after an exposure gives you a pretty high accuracy rate, but it cannot be considered conclusive. All tests MUST be repeated at three months after an exposure to confirm the result. However, someone who tests negative at six weeks, is highly unlikely to become positive at three months. You should also get a whole panel of STD tests done, since the others are far more infectious than HIV.

Is HIV a death sentence?
If diagnosed as early as possible, absolutely not. Medical professionals in all likelihood will be able to help you live a 'relatively' normal life. However, if only diagnosed at the AIDS stage, the prospects are not so good. HIV medication is now very good, and can help the immune system to recover.

Any other tips?
Although not HIV, Hepatitis B is 100X more infectious than HIV and can permanently damage your liver. Certain countries, like the UK, offer free Hep A/B vaccinations to men who have sex with men because we are considered an 'at risk' category. See your Dr for more information. EDIT (prompted by Ryan101), since vaccinations are available for Hep A & B, it is very sensible to actually get vaccinated. We can't vaccinate HIV, but we can vaccinate Hep A & B, so it's worthwhile.
EDIT (prompted by Davey): There are also many other STDs, far more infectious than HIV which can also cause severe problems. This is why you should carry out a full STD screen, rather than just screening for HIV. Also, if your body's immune system is weak due to the presence of another STD, like Syphilis, then you may be at more risk of contracting HIV, as HIV may be able to 'piggy back' the Syphilis into the body.

If you have any questions, feel free to ask. I'll try to answer them as accurately as I can, otherwise I will point you at the appropriate organisations.
I know this is a mammoth essay, but follow this information and you'll probably remain negative.
Safe sex, ALWAYS! Even in a relationship you should keep practising safe sex until you have both attended testing, and been tested negative TOGETHER. Simply asking someone if they're negative offers no proof into whether they actually are.

Some of the organisations where this data came from: WHO, UN, US CDC, NHS, POZ, Terrence Higgins Trust.
Last edited by Bourdain on 26 January 2013, 23:29, edited 6 times in total.
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Re: How to practice safe sex.

Unread postby Eryx » 21 December 2012, 15:26

Add Brazil to that list oface.
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Re: How to practice safe sex.

Unread postby Bourdain » 21 December 2012, 16:53

Eryx wrote:Add Brazil to that list oface.

Where can you get cheap or free condoms from .br sites?
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Re: How to practice safe sex.

Unread postby mattyengland » 21 December 2012, 17:22

You've reminded me that it is time for a substantial rewrite of the original HIV thread. This sounds like a project for my winter holidays.
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Re: How to practice safe sex.

Unread postby Frigid » 21 December 2012, 17:38

This topic would be better with photographs of the effects that STIs can have, as well as proper listing of symptoms.

STIs aren't the only issue regarding unsafe sex; unprotected anal sex can lead to urinary tract infections due to the residual faecal matter. There are also recent links between unprotected oral and anal sex leading to an increased risk of developing mouth and anal cancers.

Condoms in the UK

In the UK, anyone can get free condoms from a Contraceptive and Sexual Health (CASH) (formerly known as Family Planning) or Genito-Urinary Medicine (GUM) clinics. They would have to see a Health Care Assistant (HCA) or specialist nurse, but would otherwise be given free condoms.

Anyone between 14 and 24 can also sign-up for something called a C-Card (Condom Card), which allows them to simply pick up a packet of 3, 6, or 12 condoms each week from any place displaying the C-Card logo (namely CASH/GUM clinics). The amount you can get depends on your age and whether you're sexually active. They offer a choice of condoms; regular, flavoured, ribbed/dotted, large, snug, feather, sensitive (doesn't have spermicide), and latex-free. Lubricant can also be requested (it's not usually offered by the health care professional due to higher costs), but it's anyone's guess what you'll get.
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Re: How to practice safe sex.

Unread postby DK » 21 December 2012, 18:19

Being overly nerdy is the best form of safe sex. Well, the best is being ugly, but not everyone can be so lucky in that respect. For the rest of us, NERD OUT!
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Re: How to practice safe sex.

Unread postby ShutUpAndBeHappy » 21 December 2012, 23:51

This is awesome!!!

Are there any unique ways to practice safe sex that would apply to our lesbian members, or to those who participate in heterosexual activity?
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Re: How to practice safe sex.

Unread postby Marvolo » 21 December 2012, 23:53

Lesbians who stick with other lesbians are probably the safest people around when it comes to sex, very little PIV going on there.
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Re: How to practice safe sex.

Unread postby Blaz » 22 December 2012, 03:15

How about a section to cover myths? The one I hear alot is that the top is less likely to become infected during unprotected sex. How about other venereal disease symptoms to look out for?
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Re: How to practice safe sex.

Unread postby Frigid » 22 December 2012, 09:22

ShutUpAndBeHappy wrote:Are there any unique ways to practice safe sex that would apply to our lesbian members, or to those who participate in heterosexual activity?

Nothing unique. You should put a condom on sex toys (where possible) or at least wash them thoroughly between use and if sharing. Also, dental dams should be used when performing oral sex whether on the vagina or anus.

Also, don't forget that if someone has an active cold sore and sucks you off/ licks you out, you can develop genital Herpes.
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Re: How to practice safe sex.

Unread postby Brenden » 23 December 2012, 14:18

Blaz wrote:How about a section to cover myths? The one I hear alot is that the top is less likely to become infected during unprotected sex.

That's not a myth. For HIV transmission, the risk for bottoming is 50 per 10,000 exposures (1 in 200), while the risk for topping is 6.5 per 10,000 exposures (1 in 1,500). That means the risk of transmission is 7.7 times greater for the bottom. [source]
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Re: How to practice safe sex.

Unread postby Blaz » 23 December 2012, 17:46

Brenden wrote:
Blaz wrote:How about a section to cover myths? The one I hear alot is that the top is less likely to become infected during unprotected sex.

That's not a myth. For HIV transmission, the risk for bottoming is 50 per 10,000 exposures (1 in 200), while the risk for topping is 6.5 per 10,000 exposures (1 in 1,500). That means the risk of transmission is 7.7 times greater for the bottom. [source]


Wow that's informative.
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Re: How to practice safe sex.

Unread postby Eryx » 24 December 2012, 23:39

Bourdain wrote:
Eryx wrote:Add Brazil to that list oface.

Where can you get cheap or free condoms from .br sites?
http://www.buscape.com.br/preservativo.html
http://www.sitedacompra.com.br/departam ... vo-Blowtex

There are more, but it's Christmas :rolleyes:

EDIT: Free condoms are offered in clubs, concerts, public squares, schools and malls... I have over 50 condoms to spend with my boyfriend... We paid for two. :P
Last edited by Eryx on 25 December 2012, 06:35, edited 1 time in total.
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Re: How to practice safe sex.

Unread postby canna » 25 December 2012, 00:47

Well I treat people with STD's quite often (EMT-B). So I get checked quite often. Never had anything but I would just like to say something, don't think sex is the only way to catch something. I have worked with several people who have contracted STD's by treating patients.

As for sex, No comment. Stay safe.
"Ignorance more frequently begets confidence than does knowledge: it is those who know little, and not those who know much, who so positively assert that this or that problem will never be solved by science." -Darwin
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Re: How to practice safe sex.

Unread postby Joe » 26 December 2012, 00:48

Sexual Health in Bristol

REMEMBER THAT SEXUAL HEALTH SERVICES ARE COMPLETELY CONFIDENTIAL UNLESS THE STAFF BELIEVE YOU TO BE AT RISK, IN WHICH CASE THEY MAY HAVE TO TELL SOMEONE ABOVE THEM, BUT THIS WILL BE DISCUSSED WITH YOU AND WILL NOT BE SHARED WITH ANYONE WHO DOES NOT ABSOLUTELY HAVE TO KNOW.

In Bristol, sexual health services for young people are managed by a branch of the NHS called 4YP, which stand for 'For Young People'. 4YP have a distinctive logo:

Image

This is displayed in pharmacies, doctor's surgeries, the GUM clinic in the City Centre, some youth clubs and some colleges. Anywhere you see this you can pick up a chlamydia test (a shiny blue packet for males and a shiny pink one for females) and a packet of condoms. This packet normally contains eight condoms and two sachets of lube. There are normally a mix which equates to roughly 4 standard, two flavoured, a ribbed or dotted one and an extra safe. Lube-wise, there are normally two packets of plain lube.

You can go into any 4YP Doctor's Practice and ask for a drop in. They will normally see you within 15 minutes, and your consultation normally lasts 15 minutes, but can be as long as it needs to be.

You can talk to them about anything, as long as it's sex or relationships related. You can register for a C-Card, which is a condom card, as explained by Reitou Sakura above. Differently though, you can use it as many times as you need to in one period. There are ten empty squares, which get filled in as you use it. When asking for a C-Card, you are given something called 'the condom teach', in which they show you how to properly use a condom, explain sexual health to you and try to dispel any obvious myths. The condom teach is simple and easy to understand so ensure you ask away!

There's a link to the website below.

http://www.4ypbristol.co.uk/

Just remember, the key to good sexual wellbeing rests with you.
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Re: How to practice safe sex.

Unread postby Bourdain » 26 December 2012, 09:59

I will organize the thread whenever possible, right now I'm just doing some info dump, I have to go study, by the time I return or anyone sees this it will probably be all pretty, I just wish this forum had the other type of spoilers where we it's a collapsible quote like thing.
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Re: How to practice safe sex.

Unread postby Paragon » 28 December 2012, 23:38

Back when I used condoms, I got them for free at Pride Parades and events. Some events have booths that promote this or that organization, and they give away free condoms with advertising on the packets.

Youth centers also have small supplies.

Some may have figured it out, but it's important to note that size does indeed matter. If a condom is too large for the penis, it may slip off during use. If it is too small, there is risk of tearing.

Also, condoms do have a shelf life. The rubber degrades over time. It could be as long as five years before a condom becomes "unsafe", or maybe as little as one year depending on what else is on it - like lube and spermicides. Don't even bother using a condom if the packet has been opened before it's time to use it.
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Re: How to practice safe sex.

Unread postby Milo » 30 December 2012, 10:33

Excellent thread bouby :thumbsup:
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Re: How to practice safe sex.

Unread postby demo » 2 January 2013, 10:07

Milo wrote:Excellent thread bouby :thumbsup:

+1 :thumbsupwink:
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Re: How to practice safe sex.

Unread postby Xan » 3 January 2013, 04:19

Apollo wrote:Don't even bother using a condom if the packet has been opened before it's time to use it.


Who would use a condom that had been opened already...? :crazy:
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