Is it ok to ask my friend to take an at home HIV test?

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Is it ok to ask my friend to take an at home HIV test?

Unread postby unhappycardboardgame » 11 November 2020, 22:44

:shrug: Is it ok to ask my pal to take an at-home HIV test (both of us) before having sex? He insists on having sex without a condom. We’ve already had the conversation about our sexual history and testing. He told me he’s negative. On the contrary, he’s had 23 sexual partners in the past (he’s 23 years old). Is it selfish of me? Would you see this move as agressive?
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Re: Is it ok to ask my friend to take an at home HIV test?

Unread postby Eryx » 12 November 2020, 00:37

I don't think it's aggressive, it's only fair. But still, even if he does, there's no guarantee he isn't infected if he's frequently having bareback sex. HIV can take three months to come up positive so even a negative result in his case isn't much. If he really wants to fuck you without a condom, make sure you're both monogamous for at least that period, and then have him take an HIV test.

The only other solution is for you to get on PrEP, wait for a couple of months and then have bareback sex with him. That way you'll stay protected even if you don't get into a relationship with him. It's the only way I'd do it, anyway. That is, if someone I'm not even with was worth it enough for me to take a daily drug for a while just to fuck him.
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Re: Is it ok to ask my friend to take an at home HIV test?

Unread postby Jasper1 » 12 November 2020, 11:33

The health risks people are prepared to take for sex! :shrug:
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Re: Is it ok to ask my friend to take an at home HIV test?

Unread postby René » 12 November 2020, 13:04

If he's had 23 sexual partners and insists on unprotected sex, there's no way I would have sex with him at all, with or without an HIV test, and with or without a condom or PrEP. You won't be the only one he's insisted on having careless sex with. And besides the concerns Eryx voiced, HIV isn't the only scary STD out there. And condoms don't even protect against all of them.

This guy just sounds like an idiot, to be honest - one who loves taking risks and is eventually going to get very ill even if he hasn't yet. You can find someone to have sex with who doesn't casually risk his health and likely yours.
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Re: Is it ok to ask my friend to take an at home HIV test?

Unread postby rogonandi » 12 November 2020, 16:03

It’s absolutely okay to ask him to get tested. Getting tested is an excellent safety precaution that anyone who is sexually active should do from time to time.
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