My top sure doesn't like the idea of bottoming

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My top sure doesn't like the idea of bottoming

Unread postby jaredjoy90 » 4 June 2020, 21:05

Years ago I was involved in a mountain bike accident which caused significant nerve damage to my penis and made it super difficult to get an erection, even years later. My girlfriend and I couldn't get past it, and not wanting any more sexual frustration with women but wanting company, I decided to try dating men and I quickly met my husband and explained my injury to him, which he said wasn't a problem as he is a total top.

I LOVE ANAL SEX. But I also still love getting off and the idea of someone making my penis cum. Anyway, lately I've been doing lots of stretching exercises and I've been able to achieve an erection, with no pills or anything, but not as hard as it was before my accident. This is the first time I've had any hope in years, and the doctors never really helped, all they did was give me prescriptions for viagra which never helped.

So the other night during sex I started to get hard and just caressed my husband's ass. He slapped my hand away and called me the fag in our relationship. When I expressed that its been years since another person has made me cum, and would love to try anything: anal, oral, even a handjob, he is absolutely against the idea and won't have anything to do with getting me off. Of course he proceeded to fuck my ass without any remorse.

How do I go about getting off? Even though I like my husband as a person, I was "forcibly" gay and now I'm seeing sparks of light of re-expanding my sexual horizons. He is 100% against me getting off. Should I cheat or just separate and see if there are any girls out there?
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Re: My top sure doesn't like the idea of bottoming

Unread postby Choicespecs » 5 June 2020, 06:34

If youre gonna cheat it just shows there is something wrong with the relationship

Calling someone a "fag in the relationship", getting angry and invalidating someones feelings- - that is toxic and abusive behaviour.

Also the term "forcibly gay" is a concern for me. Thats not how it works. Phrasing it like that implies being gay is a choice. Which is a different set of toxic issues.
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Re: My top sure doesn't like the idea of bottoming

Unread postby rogonandi » 5 June 2020, 09:20

Your boyfriend sounds like a total asshole. The ‘fag’ in the relationship? Saying that is not only toxic and nasty, but he’s delusional if he thinks he isn’t gay because he likes to top exclusively. :rolleyes:

Rather than cheating on him, you should just dump him instead. A relationship is an equal partnership, and what you’re describing doesn’t sound equal or fair.
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Re: My top sure doesn't like the idea of bottoming

Unread postby Eryx » 8 June 2020, 14:38

He's an asshole, but if you cheat to get off, you'll be one too. If you feel like now that you can get hard, you need it in your life, then explain to your boyfriend that unless he's willing to compromise, you're now sexually incompatible. Then go get girls or guys to fuck. You can date someone else who will fulfill your wishes.

However, if you think he's the man for you and that your feelings are greater than your need to be sexually fulfilled with your dick, then start trying to get used to the idea that what you're getting is what all it's ever going to be. At least with this awful person you're dating.
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Re: My top sure doesn't like the idea of bottoming

Unread postby Frigid » 8 June 2020, 14:51

Move on because he sounds like a bastard.
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Re: My top sure doesn't like the idea of bottoming

Unread postby Mikeg132 » 12 June 2020, 12:28

Wow! You deserve so much better! A sexual relationship isn’t about power over another person it’s supposed to be about being intimate, together and pleasuring one another.

Someone once said to me “if you can accept this for the rest of your life without feeling bad about it, then carry on, if you can’t then find what you deserve”
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Re: My top sure doesn't like the idea of bottoming

Unread postby Christian2 » 12 September 2022, 13:33

Hi, a top is a top. You will not change him. Same with my boyfriend. I am only allowed to masturbate. Directly after having received a fuck from him. No exception. I was also called the fag. Sounds not so new to me.
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Re: My top sure doesn't like the idea of bottoming

Unread postby jaredjoy90 » 13 September 2022, 00:44

Christian2 wrote:Hi, a top is a top. You will not change him. Same with my boyfriend. I am only allowed to masturbate. Directly after having received a fuck from him. No exception. I was also called the fag. Sounds not so new to me.
Chris


Hi Chris,
I actually divorced my husband in the 2 years since posting here, our divorce is actually almost finalized. He is now with a woman and they are happy together. I've learned lots about myself in the time since.. While I did have my hopes up about being able to return to my old virile self, it never really came to fruition and can't really get or maintain an erection long enough to ejaculate, plus it's not really fair to my partner if they were always getting a lacklustre performance out of me. Therefore I am back to being the best bottom I can be. :)
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Re: My top sure doesn't like the idea of bottoming

Unread postby asianduck888 » 13 September 2022, 05:42

Ahhh,,, this is the complete story.
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Re: My top sure doesn't like the idea of bottoming

Unread postby Christian2 » 13 September 2022, 15:57

Thanks a lot for sharing your whole story with us. Very interesting!
So maybe your husband has never been really gay?
Did he really love you? Or did he love to have sex with you? Was Sex an important part in your relationship?
I have not heard that this happens often. My top would for sure not fuck girls. Other boys yes, but not females.
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Re: My top sure doesn't like the idea of bottoming

Unread postby jaredjoy90 » 22 September 2022, 22:38

Christian2 wrote:Thanks a lot for sharing your whole story with us. Very interesting!
So maybe your husband has never been really gay?
Did he really love you? Or did he love to have sex with you? Was Sex an important part in your relationship?
I have not heard that this happens often. My top would for sure not fuck girls. Other boys yes, but not females.
Chris


He is bisexual. Into people younger than him. He loved me but he was lazy. Sometimes people change. Circumstances change. You'd probably think if you saw he and I together that our roles in the bedroom were reverse.
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