Refusing your boyfriend/partner

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Refusing your boyfriend/partner

Unread postby Danny88 » 1 July 2019, 11:59

Bottoms in a relationship, would you ever refuse your top? Or tops in a relationship how do you feel about a bottom refusing?

I am the bottom in my relationship and would never refuse my boyfriend, my mouth and ass are there for his needs anytime.
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Re: Refusing your boyfriend/partner

Unread postby Marmaduke » 1 July 2019, 14:31

I have, I would, it’s not unusual for me to be not particularly in the mood or not want to go past a certain point. I’m understanding of those feelings in others. I couldn’t ever imagine myself being with someone for whom that was an issue.
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Re: Refusing your boyfriend/partner

Unread postby Eryx » 1 July 2019, 15:14

It really depends on the mood. I'm not always ready. And I wouldn't make a mess on the bedroom from being horny either.
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Re: Refusing your boyfriend/partner

Unread postby PopTart » 1 July 2019, 21:06

I would never take exception if a bottom refused to bottons for me and I expect the same the other way.

Now, if it became a consistent thing, I'd want to talk about it, incase there is some underlying reason as to why anal was off the menu.

But I wouldn't get upset or anything if my partner was to say... I dont really fancy it right now, something else?
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Re: Refusing your boyfriend/partner

Unread postby uncut7in » 1 July 2019, 21:08

Fortunately in my last relationship my sub b/f always begged me to fuck him, so how could I refuse?
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Re: Refusing your boyfriend/partner

Unread postby erti » 1 July 2019, 21:14

There was many times I try to say no in sex in a relationship and I gave in because he wouldn't stop. I didn't make an issue on it so it's whatever so I did whatever to shut him the fuck up. Luckily it wasn't so much of anal or vaginal sex... more so when I gave him a blowy he'd stop touching me. It's OK to say no. Don't follow my example lol.
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Re: Refusing your boyfriend/partner

Unread postby NobodySpecial » 4 July 2019, 23:33

Topping another man is an honored privileged -- not a right. I always made sure a partner was up to it before going for home base. I recall few times when a bottom had a higher sex drive than I did. Perhaps one was a guy who was constantly hard, and would have wanted to sit on my cock all night long. I think he may have been high on something as he seemed to be acting like someone on something like speed. I don't know if that effects ones cock, but his cock was so very hard the entire time -- maybe he took a blue pill also.

Other than that recollection, I was always the one with the higher sex drive. I was the one who needed to be told to calm down a bit. I've been with my partner for some 16+ years.

While I like masculine men, one of the flaws I see in his masculinity is he keeps pain pretty much to himself. Case in point, he got a cavity filled the other day, but it started hurting him. I asked him if he was up to going to work. He said yes. Low and behold, I get a call about 3 hours later from the dentist office that he had to have that tooth pulled to stop the pain. I wasn't mad at him at the least, but I was concerned. I just think he should have been kinder to HIMSELF. Sometimes when I do help him out, he complains that he doesn't want to be coddled. Again some of this macho BS that I challenge him on sometimes. The worse was when he ended up getting 5 bypasses. Thank goodness he didn't have a heart attack, but he covered up the pain for quite a while by simply popping antacids --thinking it was just indigestion.

So giving you some background on his personality, I had to watch myself when I fucked him. I would look for any signs of discomfort while I was fucking him as he wouldn't have the heart to ask me to stop sometimes. I was capable of fucking for a decent amount of time. He wanted me to get my nutt, but more important to me is that he was happy, comfortable, and no damage to his body as he means everything to me. I've always craved fucking a man, but that is secondary to my partner's happiness and well being.

Some bottoms may enjoy the thought of an overbearing top, but the best of tops always makes sure the bottom is doing fine. I maybe a pain in the ass, but I Insist on being a kind, caring pain even if it means taking a break or calling it quits for the night.

Fucking a bottom gives one great orgasm; loving a bottom and his well being can give you a lifetime of orgasms and happiness.
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Re: Refusing your boyfriend/partner

Unread postby rogonandi » 5 July 2019, 04:14

Even if you're in a relationship or marriage/partnership, it's never cool to force yourself on your partner.
People love to follow fools; they don't feel so alone then.

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Re: Refusing your boyfriend/partner

Unread postby Yeauxleaux » 5 July 2019, 23:56

I have a pretty high sex drive and would be in the mood to go pretty much any time with a guy I really liked. That said I don't see why it would be a big deal if, sometimes, you just don't wanna have sex, or at least anal sex anyway. Anal takes a lot of preparation (for it to be clean, at least) and sometimes you just really need to be in the mood to enjoy getting fucked.

I don't think it needs to be a big deal or something you need to be apologetic about, you say "ehh not right now..." and that's enough for any respectful guy who really likes you.

Also it's not one-sided, sometimes a top might not be in the mood for sex either.

There have been times where, tbh, I've continued letting a guy fuck me when I've lost interest halfway through. None of those situations were rape, mind you, I've never like outright told a guy to stop and he didn't, but sometimes I'm just like "eh whatever, there's no harm in this, I'll let him have his fun".
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