Sex bloopers

Share stories, ask questions, get answers.

Sex bloopers

Unread postby Chrisr1818 » 1 January 2021, 00:45

Let’s start the new year off with a bang and a laugh!!

Post your blooper here!

The first one that jumps out of my mind was....

I was blowing this guy with a massive cock and as he was cumming he held my head and was trying to deep throat me. Well I started gaging and coughing than all of a sudden I sneezed and cum came out my nose! I felt like my sinuses were filled and I swear all I could smell for the rest of the night was his jizz in my sinuses.
Chrisr1818
 
Posts: 20
+1s received: 7
Joined: 17 December 2020, 23:19

Re: Sex bloopers

Unread postby richardjohnstone0683 » 1 January 2021, 07:58

What a great topic! Hmmm... I kind of find semen to be sexy though... my best probably what led to me being outed to my family.... I was giving my boyfriend at the time a blowjob and he liked to see cum on my face then used his cock to push it into my mouth for me to swallow... except this time was just before we went to see my family (I told them we were friends)... well I missed a big chunk of cum beside my mouth when cleaning up with a wet wipe. My parents clued in quickly.
richardjohnstone0683
 
Posts: 35
+1s received: 12
Joined: 30 December 2019, 18:35

Re: Sex bloopers

Unread postby jamessemaj » 1 January 2021, 19:14

I was jealous at the start of reading that story...
James
x
User avatar
jamessemaj
 
Posts: 19
+1s received: 3
Joined: 31 December 2016, 15:23
Country: United Kingdom (gb)

Re: Sex bloopers

Unread postby Eryx » 4 January 2021, 20:29

haahah to be honest I find this idea pretty fun, there's some really funny moments in sex. It can't always be like in porn.
Image

Image Image Image

You are not entitled to your opinion. You are entitled to your informed opinion. No one is entitled to be ignorant.
— Harlan Ellison
User avatar
Eryx
 
Posts: 2844
+1s received: 1800
Joined: 20 December 2012, 21:48
Location: Belo Horizonte, MG
Country: Brazil (br)

Re: Sex bloopers

Unread postby VagrantMenagerie » 8 January 2021, 00:55

It was my first time and somewhat his (the most he did before was a blowjob). We went through the rounds, make outs, blowjobs, you get the idea. Well, suddenly in the heat of the moment I wanted to be penetrated. And we didn't have the foresight to have condoms or even lube because stupid.

The guy wasn't all that long but he was definitely girthy, and he only got half an inch in before I immediately told him to stop. The experience was so bad that it wasn't until a couple years later that I tried bottoming again with someone else, PROPERLY; at which point it was fucking great.
VagrantMenagerie
 
Posts: 51
+1s received: 19
Joined: 15 December 2020, 01:31
Country: United States (us)

Re: Sex bloopers

Unread postby Eryx » 8 January 2021, 19:45

Mine was similar but I went through with it. I had just broken up and this was the first guy that actually gave me his address. He was only a few blocks away and I could walk there. He lived in some sort of ingrown village you only see in Rio (it looks like a street you can turn to, but it's a dead end and there are identical tiny houses glued to each other all around you). I got there and he was this very handsome middle aged guy.

Anyway, we started making out, we went to his bed, we undressed, all the usual. We were still making out and got the condom and I positioned myself to ride him. I was so excited to be with someone else that as soon as it all went in, I felt too good... and I came right there. On top of him. In 10 seconds.

He said it was okay and that I was probably too eager whatever... I laid down next to him but he wanted to keep going and I had lost all my libido. I just wanted 10 minutes to recoup and do my job but he didn't want to wait. He escorted me out (more like pushed me like a dog to his front door) and I never thought about him again. Except when I want to make fun of myself.
Image

Image Image Image

You are not entitled to your opinion. You are entitled to your informed opinion. No one is entitled to be ignorant.
— Harlan Ellison
User avatar
Eryx
 
Posts: 2844
+1s received: 1800
Joined: 20 December 2012, 21:48
Location: Belo Horizonte, MG
Country: Brazil (br)

Re: Sex bloopers

Unread postby Chrisr1818 » 8 January 2021, 23:46

Another time I was bottoming and all of a sudden I hear him say oh crap! Condom broke.

I turn around and it’s not broke. It’s gone! We tore the bed apart looking for it, after 5 minutes we realized it must be in my ass. He lubed up his fingers real good and dove in. He pretty much fisted my ass until he was able to pull it out. First and last fisting! Lol

After that it was bareback!
Chrisr1818
 
Posts: 20
+1s received: 7
Joined: 17 December 2020, 23:19


Recently active
Users browsing this forum: CommonCrawl [Bot], Google [Bot], PanicP, René, ryan.j50, Yandex [Bot] and 226 guests