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Is my gf gay?

Unread postPosted: 17 May 2022, 17:09
by Delpedro21
Hi everyone, I desperately need some advice about my gf. I am a 32 years old Portuguese, straight male, and my gf is 37, English "straight" female. We have been together 8 years and we had a year apart in between that. I have always thought from day one that my gf was at least bi, at a push maybe even lesbian. It didn't bother me much the first 2-3 years since it didn't interfer with our relationship or chemistry. Now after the year we were apart things have changed.
During that year apart, I moved out of our house. My gf asked a female friend to move in with her. A friend she only knew for a couple of weeks then, and even gave our/hers big room to this girl, and moved to the single spare room herself. When we got back together after that year, I couldn't go to the house (I lived in for 5 years before) while her friend lived there. Also once or twice a week they would have a alcohol and drugs session and I couldn't call that night or ask about it. Gf would just lie if I asked. Couple months later the friend moved out and I moved in. Since then my gf has visited/ dropped some stuff off few times, lied about it and told me only months later. If I ask she gets very defensive, and won't answer me. I also found out they used to have physical fights with each other. Apart from all that, our sex life changed after that year apart.
Gf won't let me go down on her, I can't finger her etc. Our sex consists exactly of me getting the "tip" in and not move at all while she uses the vibrator. Always like this. I have asked if she preferred women, I didn't mind if it made her happier. Her answer is always no. Is my gf a lesbian? What do I do?