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Trainer at gym hot/cold (long read)

Unread postPosted: 22 September 2022, 08:02
by Babyspice98
Hello all,

I met this trainer guy at the gym about three years ago, at the time I'd only workout for about two weeks then disappear. Whenever I first met him he complimented my skin and gave me workout suggestions (one seriously made everything snatched if you know what I mean).

This year I returned to working out and he's helped me get back into shaped. The first month he actual told me that he loved me and that he couldn't wait to see his aura all over me (not sure what that means but I went with it and started calling him big bro). Two weeks ago I had really bad sunburn, so I took a week off from working out( and figured he'd miss me). Once I returned, I informed him about having sunburn and moved on (because of a look he gave me). The trainer at some point started mentioning how great it is that we've reunited and would insist that I return everyday at a certain time which is something he typically does, he also mentioned being proud almost everyday.

He is no longer hands on with training (his work girlfriend gets jealous) although he will give me workout instructions but he'll ignore me until I ask repeatedly, today I seriously grabbed his arm before he walked away from me lol. He doesn't seem to mind telling me to do XY&Z so the ignoring me seems like a game he's playing or something.

In the past I've asked that he relax whenever he'd come on too strong (biting his lip and bouncing his pec at me) which will last for about a week. This week he's given me creep vibes... I caught him staring at me with what appeared to be hate in his eyes, he also made sure to be a few feet if not inches away from me at all times while training others in the gym. He seems to resent that I take no issue with not coming to the gym although, he makes no effort to get to know me outside of it. He also likes to distance me from anything that brings me joy like my ear phones, cooling down in front of a fan, and chatting with other gym employees ( he walked over today and told me to stop chatting with an employee and suggested that person and I grab dinner sometime as he put it "denden").
At times he comes across as abusive... On Tuesday I informed not to slap my hand so hard whenever saying hello to me because it hurts, he made light of it and continued. For some strange reason he also likes to comment on being a ladies man ALL THE TIME. He and I have a goal of 70 pull ups a day but for some odd reason whenever I joined him yesterday he asked that I get out of his view because attractive women could be walking by, then said "your cool and all" (which is a way of saying I'm also attractive). I told him to shut up and continued doing pulls up and squats between sets per his request. I get the sense that he's DL and wants to get to know me because he has conveniently touched my behind lightly more than once(making it appear that it's mistake), but at times it seems as if he actual hates my guts. I that he sometimes scares me and his response was "good I want to scared all men". A month ago he commented on my glowing skin, and the whites of my eyes (isn't that considered flirting)?

I can tell he enjoys seeing me which makes his being hot/cold so odd, last week while doing push ups I over heard him asking where I was until he started looking for me and found me.


What's your take on the situation and how should I go about moving forward?

Re: Trainer at gym hot/cold (long read)

Unread postPosted: 22 September 2022, 08:34
by Marmaduke
Personal trainers at the gym earn shit basic salary and make all their money on upselling hours so, like any good staff in the sales industry where your income rests on the amount of work you sell, they frame themselves using what they think you’re looking for.

I’d say he’s gay baiting you to sell training sessions, but I’m a cynic. It’s all too easy to convince yourself something is possible when you want it.

Re: Trainer at gym hot/cold (long read)

Unread postPosted: 22 September 2022, 08:55
by Babyspice98
Thank you for your informed perspective.... he has mentioned the gym tying up his money, he's also shown me the amount of money he gained from a particular investment (I suppose he was proud of himself and wanted to share lol).

I'd prefer that he stopped trying to gay bait me, and wonder how he will respond if I stopped asking for workout suggestions.